Haunting Past
by KB0408
Summary: Ziva finds a message that will make her fend for her life, but when she finds out Tony's life is now also under threat she will do ANYTHING to stop it, even if it means sacraficing herself. Many twists leaing up to what is a totally TIVA story. :
1. Chapter 1

**A.N Hey I would love to hear any feedback on this so I know how I am going and if I can improve, it would be much appretiated. If you like the story just leave a comment and I will continue on with it. Enjoy! :)**

It was a sunny Sunday afternoon, and it was the perfect weather, not too hot, and not too cold. Special agent Anthony DiNozzo was spread out on the sofa while the credits of his 3rd movie scrolled down the television screen. After playing football all morning Tony was tired and could feel himself slowly drifting off, his eyes were heavy and he was finally giving in. Tony loved Sundays, he could do whatever he wanted and at that moment it was to sleep. As the afternoon sun drifted through the small windows along the living room wall Tony felt like nothing could be better than this, nothing could wreck this moment… the peace and quiet at last, no McGee, no Gibbs, no dead petty officers, no worries.

Finally Tony dozed off into the best sleep he had been able to get all week, he had been working a lot of overtime, meaning some nights not getting sleep at all. By the end of the week he was exhausted and grumpy, hoping never to come to work again, but unfortunately the world would not let him catch a break, just as he started to get into a deep sleep he was woken by the loud buzzing of his phone vibrating on the wooden coffee table. Startled and disorientated he tried to reach for the phone while knocking almost everything over within a one meter radius, he finally grabbed the phone and flipped it open.

"What!" he snapped, there was a slight pause on the other end before a heavenly accented voice purred through the receiver, "Someone is happy".

Instantly Tony felt bad hearing Ziva's voice on the other end of the phone. Ziva, a former Mossad agent now NCIS, beautiful, cunning, deadly and mostly the receiving end of Tony's teasing and insults. Although they seem like they don't get along Tony likes to think that something is there, although they have always been attracted to one another, they would never think of dating and with everything that has happened between them was it even possible?

"Sorry Ziva, just woke up. What's the matter?" A short pause came before Ziva replied, "Dead navy Lieutenant at Anacostia park".

Anacostia park, Washington's largest recreational area spread out over more than 485 hectares with swimming pools, skate parks, ball fields you name it. When Tony finally made it to the north end of the park he was relieved to see that he was not the only one in casual attire. With jeans and a loose cotton T-shirt Tony waltzed over to where McGee and Gibbs were standing around the NCIS truck.

"Where's Zee-vah? She told me to get here ASAP and she's late?"

"Here 20 minutes before you" Tony Jumped as Ziva whispered it in his ear.

"Ziva, you seriously have to stop doing that!" Ziva gave a soft chuckle as Tony tried to stare her down unsuccessfully.

"Are you two finished? Cause you might want to start doing your jobs!" Gibbs said giving the whole three a stern look. "DiNozzo, photos; Ziva, bag and tag; McGee with me".

"Yes boss" said Tony and McGee simultaneously as McGee trudged off after Gibbs always trying to impress.

As Tony got the camera out of his backpack he realised for the first time what Ziva was actually wearing. Instead of her usual baggy cargo pants she had Denim, skin tight jeans that showed her every perfect curve and contour. Tony then slid his eyes up to her torso where she had a tight fitting black tank top and then he looked up to her face her long dark brown curls which were left out instead of in a tight bun as usual were framing her face bringing out her deep brown eyes. Tony always though she was beautiful but today she looked stunning. He couldn't help but to take a picture just to remember the moment. Ziva had now caught on to the fact Tony was staring at her and she started to wonder why all of a sudden he cared what she wore, _does he feel differently about me? No impossible_ she thought, Tony and her were just partners… nothing more.

"Tony! What are you doing!" Ziva's sharp voice snapped Tony out of his imagination and back into reality.

"What? What did I do?" Tony genuinely didn't know what she meant; Ziva gave him a confused glance as she thought about what to say. "You were staring Tony…" "No I wasn't" "Yes you were…" Ziva quickly replied letting Tony know he was caught.

"You just look different, like with what your wearing, and your hair…" As Tony said this he had walked up to her and was now standing very close. He looked her up and down once more and started to twirl her hair around his index finger only to be startled as Ziva grabbed his wrist suddenly and forced it away. Tony narrowed his eyes before walking off holding his left wrist to go and take some more photos… of the crime scene this time.

Ziva turned around and started to look at the murdered Lieutenant that lay before her in a pool of his own blood. She started to recreate what happened in her head… _surprise __attacker__, knife across his throat, no chance_. Ziva started to go through the pockets of the Lieutenants Navy uniform, one that will never be warn again. While searching for personal affects she heard Gibbs in the distance call for Tony, half tuned in half tuned out she continued to search and came up with nothing until she found a slip of white paper in the inside of his jacket. She opened the half folded slip of paper to read one word, a word she had hoped not to hear in her lifetime. She stared at the slip of paper with trembling hands and she read that one word over and over, swallowing hard and becoming that bit more uneasy every time. There was no doubt that it couldn't be just a coincidence, it wasn't, the message was meant for her, this murder was for her.

"Lieutenant James Wilson, aged 35 from Quantico" stated McGee as he read off his portable fingerprint scanner.

"Where the hell is Duckie! I called over an hour ago!" Gibbs was pacing, coffee in hand.

"This is why he shouldn't let the autopsy gremlin navigate, every time they get lost!" Tony was about to go on when another NCIS truck pulled up near the scene.

"Mr Palmer why do you insist on navigating when all you do is get us lost! We have work to do!" Ducky was using his frustrated tone and when he walked up to the rest of the group flustered and red they knew it had been a long drive. Palmer was right behind him carrying the medical bags, him too looking quite agitated. Tony decided that it wasn't the time for a wise crack joke so he just stared at Palmer with a mocking look on his face as a wicked smile tugged the corners of his mouth. It's safe to say that Tony and Palmer were not the best of friends. "I'll show you the way, Ziva should be finished bagging and tagging by now so you will have the body all to yourselves" Tony started to trek eagerly down the hill towards the body with a less than enthused Ducky and Palmer slowly following behind.

When they reached the Lieutenants body Ziva stood motionless staring at the message in her hand, when she heard Tony make his way over to her with his companions she hesitated slightly before swiftly slipping the piece of paper into her back jean pocket. Tony looked over at Ziva and watched her. He noticed her shaky hands and a look of dread on her pale white face which was normally the colour of melted gold.

"Ziva… Ziva…Zeeevahhh! Oi!" Tony still received no response from his partner. Tony walked over to her now concerned and lightly tapped on her shoulder. "Ziva, are you alright?"

"What" said Ziva as her head whipped round so suddenly that she was a little of balance and Tony had to steady her. Tony looked deep into her eyes with one big warm hand on each shoulder, again he asked if she was ok and waited as she just stared back trying to think what she can and can't say. "I am fine" she said finally and receiving a not so convinced look from Tony. "I just feel a bit queasy, I am fine, just a lack of sleep" she said this with a weak reassuring smile. Although unconvinced Tony dropped it and told her that Gibbs said they can go home and catch up on their sleep and that they will be meeting early the next morning. Normally they would have to work through the night; everything else can wait including sleep itself. But for the first time the long hours must be catching up on Gibbs also meaning they can finally get a rest just before another long week of catching a murderer.


	2. Chapter 2

A.N. Hey here is the second chapter it was quite long so I split it into 2. I would love feedback anything that will help me improve my writing. Also if people like it I will continue writing the rest. Enjoy

"Morning McGoo, what are you doing there?" Tony walked over to his desk and dumped his backpack, took his gun, badge, phone and keys and slid them into his draw. He then walked over and stood in front of McGee's desk while he was concentrating on his computer screen.

"I have just Overclocked my CPU, boosting performance in the processing of data. I Also updated the Hard Drive to 10'000rpm raptors, lowering seek time and assisting the loading data. The GPU has been tweeked so that it is operating at optimum levels. I have also..." Tony was standing with a neutral look on his face completely tuned out. "Stop with the McGeek speech McGeek. Last time I ask you what you are doing."

Tony walked back to his desk and leaned back in his chair, he glanced over and just then realised that the desk opposite was unoccupied. "Where's Ziva?" said Tony, he started to think about how she acted in the park yesterday and hoped that she was just on a coffee run and not actually ill. "Ummm, hasn't come in this morning" said McGee still not lifting his eyes from the computer monitor and typing at lightning speed.

Tony logged into his computer and started researching the background of the dead Lieutenant although not concentrating very much he found enough to keep Gibbs happy, not that Gibbs is ever really happy… o well it was enough. What Tony was really concentrating on is Ziva, _why does it bother me so much? She can take care of herself. _Tony felt down knowing that she had fallen ill and he wouldn't get to spend yet another day with her in the bullpen. He hadn't really realised he would care so much if she wasn't there which yet again got him thinking how he really felt. He had really screwed up her life, he felt pain when thinking about killing her boyfriend, and if it wasn't for that she wouldn't have gone back to Israel. She wouldn't have gone back to Mossad and she wouldn't have been captured and tortured for 3 months, mentally and physically. This is what hurt Tony the most, he can remember thinking she was dead. How his life just stopped, how he felt… crushed. He remembers her face when he first saw her in Somalia. The scratches on her face, the bruises, the scars and her lifeless expression, if already dead.

"Where's Ziva? Tony!" Gibbs was standing in front of Tony's desk impatiently waiting for a reply.

" I don't know boss isn't she sick? I thought she had called you?" "Well do you think I would be asking if she had, Tony?" "No boss, I will call her right away", Tony picked up the phone and dialled the too familiar number. No answer. He tried a second time, a third, he tried her mobile her home, no answer. _This__was not like Ziva she would have called and she is always on time_. Tony felt the same worry he experience seeing her in the park yesterday afternoon, _what if something really was wrong, she wasn't sick she was in trouble… why didn't I see it!_

"Boss she isn't answering… I think something is wrong." Gibbs looked up and stared in question. Tony told both Gibbs and McGee about what had happened the day before. "This isn't like her boss… I think she may be in a lot of trouble", and Tony knew it.

It didn't take long for Abby to find out about Ziva's disappearance and she was pacing up and down in her lab, a look of worry spread over her face and when Tony walked into her lab he almost got knocked flying when Abby and him in one of her hugs.

"I can't lose her again Tony! It was too close last time, not again! Oh please tell me she will be ok, I guess she can take care of herself being an assassin and all, but what if she isn't Tony!" Tony just embraced her hug and let her get it all out, he rubbed his hand up and down her back trying to soothe her. "Abby, I'm sure she will be fine" _I hope she will be fine._ "Abby can you trace her phone; we need to start looking for her".

Abby dropped her arms from around Tony's neck and raced over to the computers in the middle of the room. She brought up the search and typed in Ziva's number. After a couple of minutes the computer beeped to show it had found the results. Abby read the computer and with a confused tone simply said "It says she's at home". Before Abby could even say another word the room was empty.

The car tires screeched to a halt as Tony pulled up to the curb opposite her building, double parked like the night he went up and killed Rivkin. Tony shuddered at the thought and hoped that this time wouldn't be so dramatic. He was out the car door and across the street within seconds before looking up the building and sliding in the glass doors. Tony pushed the button for the elevator and after waiting for a mere 5 seconds couldn't wait any longer and dashed for the stairs. _Why does she have to be on the top floor, _Tony was panting hard when he finally reached Ziva's door hoping that she would be inside.

Tony walked closer to knock when he saw a fine crack down the edge, his eyes slid down to the lock, _tampered._ Tony had his gun out when he slowly pushed open the door, it creaked loudly and the room was dark. "Ziva? Ziva are you in here, its Tony" No response came from the dark apartment. Tony slid across the wall feeling for the switch and it was soon clear that there was no Ziva. The dim light filled the room and revealed open draws, paper scattered across the floor boards, there was broken glass and photos knocked down, he saw that every book in the bookshelf had been thrown across the room, someone had trashed her apartment in search of something, _but what?_

Tony walked into the middle of the living room where a mobile phone sat on a cleared coffee table, Ziva's phone. Tony picked up her phone and flipped it open, he decided to look through her previous calls and messages to look for a clue on what might have happened the only problem was that there was no memory; all her messages, photos and contacts had been erased. Tony snapped the phone shut and looked down to see a message on the table. Tony picked up the note and started to read the one sentence written in neat hand writing, Ziva's neat hand writing.

_**Please do not come after me, stop looking. **_

_**Ziva**_


	3. Chapter 3

**A.N. Hey 3rd Chapter up! I hope you all like it and I would realllly appretiate Reviews! they mean so much to me and help me/ modivate me in writing more chapters so I would love more reviews with any tips on them you have :) I would also like to thank a good friend of mine with helping me in writing this story. Enjoy!**

_Where to go, where is a safe place, how much do they know about me, are they following? Have they found me already?_

Ziva grabbed a backpack and stuffed it with the necessities barely enough for a few days but she had no time to grab a suitcase. Ziva grabbed all her I.D and all her important documents and placed them in a large zip-lock bag making sure the top was sealed. She ran into the bathroom and opened the top of the toilet, she slipped the bag down leaving a little bit at the top to curl over the back of the toilet and shut the lid. The only identification she had on her was her passport which she had slid to the bottom of her backpack; she then felt around in the pockets of her coat and pulled out her mobile. She flipped her phone oped and went into her contacts; a little box appeared on the screen, _Delete all contacts? _Ziva pushed the left hand key corresponding to yes. She ran to the bookshelf and ripped a page out of the first book she grabbed and she rummaged for a pen in the bottom of her desk draws, she simply wrote:

**Please do not come after me, stop looking. **

**Ziva**

She quickly ran to the coffee table and swept of the smashed glass of the vase that once stood there and put the note on the table with her phone on top. She started off to the kitchen when she stood on a photo frame that lay on the ground. She picked up the pine photo frame and turned it over to see a photo of herself around 7 years back. She stood next to a tall man with black hair, both of them smiling and enjoying each other's company. She took the photo out of the frame and roughly folded it into her pocket before grabbing her gun and slipping out the front door. As she ran for the stairs she heard footsteps coming up at a slow pace and heavy breathing. Instincts told her run and she dashed for the elevator which opened immediately as she pushed the button, _Convenient._ Ziva took a deep breath as the elevator light above the doors showed it slowly going down through the levels, this was the first time Ziva had a chance to just stop, breathe and think. Although she knew she needed to run she had no idea where and she was still contemplating whether she should go and find the person who left the message, a long lost friend. _I hope he is ok… _

When the elevators finally opened on the ground floor Ziva looked around making sure the lobby was empty before swiftly moving from the elevator, through the lobby and out the front doors onto the street into the rain. Before making her way up the street she glanced across the road to see Tony's car double parked and very much crooked to the side of the curb. Ziva's heart skipped a beat as she looked frantically for Tony in the car, empty. Her heart ached thinking about leaving Tony but she didn't want to bring him into it or any of the others, but especially Tony. She knew he would do something stupid and risky if he found out was happening just like how he flew into Somalia to her rescue. _Stupid Tony! Doesn't he know he could have been killed! Why did he do it? _Ziva still wasn't sure, a warm sensation covered her body at the thought that it may be he cared for her more than partners. As Ziva thought about it more she started to realise what she needed to do, what she has to do or she will never forgive herself. Ziva started walking in the opposite direction to originally planned, she needed a taxi… it was too far to walk.

* * *

Tony stood in the middle of Ziva's apartment with the message in his hand. _Why shouldn't I go look for her? I want to find her; I want her in my arms safe and sound…_ Tony's heart sunk when he read this message, just thinking of Ziva running away, just thinking that he may never see her again, thinking that she may be in too much trouble for to handle herself. Tony paced her apartment, mobile in hand, _should I call Gibbs? Abby? _Tony decided against it knowing that Ziva had asked for no one to get involved. He decided to honour that… partially. He won't tell anyone about the message or her apartment, but nothing will stop him from looking for her, even Ziva herself.

Tony decided to call it a night; he started the long trip home to his apartment thinking about where Ziva could be at this moment. 2 days ago he didn't even realise how strong his feelings really were for Ziva until he lost her. He felt the same in Somalia but because of everything that had happened he let it go. But this time is different; Tony thought about how she felt and became doubtful. _Ziva wouldn't feel the same… would she? _

Tony pulled up in front of his apartment, this time he was not double parking and in no rush to get to his empty, dark apartment. Sleeping was not really possible while Tony had everything rushing through his head, still trying to process. Tony took the elevator this time after swearing to himself never to take stairs when there is a lift present. Tony walked the small distance from the elevator to his apartment door and sluggishly turned the key to unlock the door in a swift movement he tried to turn the handle expecting the door to open but instead ran straight into the locked door. Tony had re-locked it. _Did I leave it unlocked this morning? No… I defiantly remember locking it._ Alarm bells went off in Tony's head as he carefully unlocked the door and crept in.

"Hello?" Silence answered as he continued to edge forward into the living room. Tony had his gun out now and turned on the switch. The room was empty.

"Hello? Anyone here?" Tony called out again to the empty living room. This time Tony heard something, not a reply but a soft weeping sound coming from the bedroom. Tony stood back to the wall next to his bedroom door as he breathed deeply, _1, 2, 3, go! _Tony whipped around the corner gun pointed to see someone sitting against his bedroom wall, arms wrapped tightly around legs brought closely to their chest, a soft weep came from the person. Tony's hand slid slowly to the light switch and flicked it on casting a dim light across the room. He knew who it was immediately by the messy brown curls draping down her back and surrounding her face. He noticed the same jeans and black tank top she wore yesterday and she was soaking wet from the rain outside.

"Ziva?"


	4. Chapter 4

**OK! So here is the next chapter, there should be alot more TIVA in this chapter. Thankyou sooo much for all the reviews and I hope to get more from you with ideas and/or suggestions. It is very helpful so here is the next part hope you enjoy! :o)**

"Hello? Anyone here?" Tony called out again to the empty living room. This time Tony heard something, not a reply but a soft weeping sound coming from the bedroom. Tony stood back to the wall next to his bedroom door as he breathed deeply, _1, 2, 3, go! _Tony whipped around the corner gun pointed to see someone sitting against his bedroom wall, arms wrapped tightly around legs brought closely to their chest, a soft weep came from the person. Tony's hand slid slowly to the light switch and flicked it on casting a dim light across the room. He knew who it was immediately by the messy brown curls draping down her back and surrounding her face. He noticed the same jeans and black tank top she wore yesterday and she was soaking wet from the rain outside.

"Ziva?"

Tony waited for a response but got none in return. Tony had never seen Ziva as vulnerable as she was at this moment. Normal Ziva was the rock in the team, not showing any emotions… the perfect warrior. Even when rescuing her in Sudan she stayed strong although physically weak and Tony had always admired her for her strength. But now, now she was broken. Tony had never seen her cry before and he really didn't know what to do, an ache spread from the inside of his chest as he stood there silently watching her fists clench and unclench around her knees and as she slowly took deep breaths trying to keep herself calm. It was evident that she was trying to regain her strength but was too overwhelmed to pick it all back up and bottle it inside. Tony couldn't take it anymore… to see her so upset just made him feel terrible inside, like he too was part of it all. Tony walked into the bathroom and grabbed a towel that was hanging over the top of the shower. He walked back to Ziva and draped the towel around her shoulders before sliding down the wall and sitting next to her with his legs stretched out.

"Ziva… please talk to me, what is going on? I want to help you." Tony looked her over as she sat still with her knuckles white from clenching her fists so tightly.

"You cannot help me." Ziva finally said without lifting her head. Although barely audible, tony could hear how weak her voice was.

"Then why are you here Ziva?" Tony said this in a soothing voice trying to get Ziva to talk. Ziva stirred before finally lifting her head, bloodshot eyes stared into Tony's and he noticed the gash across the left side of her forehead. Her eyes were puffy and red and her cheeks were damp with tears.

"I do not know. I am sorry. I… ", Ziva could barely get anything out before tears welled in her eyes. The real reason was that she was scared, although she would not tell Tony; she needed him, just to see him and only him. Tony's hand cautiously whipped the tears off her cheeks before pushing her wet curls behind her ear to inspect the gash. Normally Ziva would have not let him do this but at this moment her guard was down and the only relief she felt was when Tony was with her.

"Come with me" Tony stood up and held his hands up for Ziva to take them. She hesitated before gently placing her hands in his and being pulled up to her feet. Tony let go of her hands too quickly and before he knew it she was falling from her weak, shaky legs. Tony caught her and pulled her close to him watching her every movement closely. Just the warmth of the side of her body pressed into his sent shivers up his spine, his heart pounded inside his chest as her long brown hair brushed against his bare arms, he had to stop himself from pushing her up against the wall and feeling her soft lips moving against his. _No, now is not the time, she needs a __**friend**_.

He wrapped a long arm around her waist securely before leading her out into the living room and gently letting her down on the sofa. Tony then realised she wasn't just trembling but shivering, her clothes were almost dry but her long wet hair would have made her freezing in the cold temperature. Tony walked back into the bedroom and returned with a thick coffee coloured mink blanket and draped it around Ziva's shoulders and wrapped the rest around her legs.

"Coffee?" Ziva nodded her head weakly not meeting Tony's eyes. Tony again felt a dull ache come from the middle of his chest and spread down into his abdomen. She was distraught, weak and upset. This broke Tony's heart and he promised himself to do anything it takes just to see the warm cheeky smile spread across her face again. Tony looked at the gash that had left a trail of dry blood down the side of her face. _What has happened? How serious is this? _

_

* * *

_

Tony handed Ziva hercup of steaming coffee while he took his own and sat next to her on the sofa. Her trembling hands shook as she brought the cup slowly up to her mouth to take a very small sip. Tony stared at her face intensely and Ziva could feel his eyes on her. She turned to look at him, still deciding what to say, what she can tell him.

"Please Ziva, what has happened to you?" Ziva turned to stare deeply into his eyes. Just looking at him sent her heart pounding and before she could say anything the room started spinning until all she could see was blackness. The light in the room slowly came back as she then realised she now had her head against Tony's chest. Her heartbeat was hammering in her head and her breathing had become short, shallow breaths. Tony's hand sweep across her face collecting her hair and again pushing it behind her ears.

"You need a doctor now, come on I will…" Tony couldn't even finish before Ziva's head shot up and her hands flapped in front of her as a gesture.

"NO, no, no you cannot Tony please. No!" Her face was pleading and Tony noticed the fear within her. _Why is she afraid, why won't she go to the hospital, she NEEDS a doctor!"_

"Why not, please Ziva tell me what happened… If you don't then I am taking you. You will have no choice." Ziva was torn; she stared off into space as her brain sorted through her options. She glanced at Tony and took a deep breath before reaching into her pocket and pulling out a piece of white paper and handing it to Tony.

"What is it? I can't read it, it's in Arabic?"

"Yes. It is in Arabic. It was left for me at the crime scene on Sunday." Ziva took a deep breath and looked up to read Tony's reaction, confusion mostly but a bit of disbelief was mixed in.

"What's it say?"

"The word does not mean anything. It is made up, like if I were to put a whole random lot of letters together. It means nothing." Tony just stared at her with an 'I am totally lost now you need to explain more' look on his face.

Ziva went on, "It is not what the word means but the meaning behind it. 7 years ago I was on assignment for Mossad, it was me and a friend of mine, his name was Anah Kishon." Ziva again rummaged around in her pocket before pulling out a crumpled photograph of her and a tall man with black hair. "This is him" she explained while pointing a long index finger at the man in the photo.

"I cannot say what the assignment was but it was of high priority and very dangerous. At one stage Anah and I got split up. We were to go alone and try to take down the head of the unit we were targeting. This photo was taken just before we split, we both knew that there was a good chance that we would die, but at the time… I did not live for anything; I was brought up a killer and I did not care about dying. I had nothing to live for." Ziva's tears began to splash onto the photograph in her hands. Tony held her hand as he rubbed his thumb up and down between the base of her thumb and index finger. Her head swayed right as she leant into Tony's shoulder. Her wet tears soaked the sleeve of his shirt and he could feel her hot breath down his arm.

"Ziva…" Tony said her name in a hushed soothing voice, unsure what to say next he decided to let her have a moment and he rested his head on the top of hers before embracing her in a hug. Tony's hand rubbed up and down her back between her shoulder blades and she felt calm and happy for the first time since she discovered the slip of paper. After a moment Ziva lifted her head and continued with her story, Tony listened intently.

"When we split up we made up that word" she said pointing to the slip of paper on the coffee table. "The word means that our cover is blown, it is a warning that either one of us is in trouble. That we are being hunted…" Tony almost didn't believe Ziva when she said they would be hunter, but when she looked up into his eyes there was no doubt of the seriousness of the message.

"Tony you do not understand what these people can and WILL do! Anah and I were the only ones who knew enough to shut down their operation, and we still are." Ziva began to fidget and her fear was evident. _She is not safe… if I lose her again, not again. _

Ziva wiped tears from under her red, puffy eyes and went on...

"When we split up I never heard from Anah again. We were almost certain he had been killed and I was on high alert for the next year at least. I have never seen him again; I thought he died 7 years ago! But when I saw… when I saw that piece of paper, the way the lieutenant had been… killed. He must be here Tony, I have to find him. He may be my only chance of surviving." Although it killed Tony to think of Ziva's protection in the hands of another man he understood her thinking. Tony waited until she seemed to be relatively emotionally stable until he went on.

"Your apartment has been raided".

"I know… I was there." Tony's face was utter disbelief and then worry as he again looked at the 6 centimetre cut on the left of her head. "I am OK Tony. He came in as I was about to get the hell out of there. There was only one man. I heard things being smashed, thrown around. I went to grab my weapons but he surprised me from behind, knife to my neck… I panicked… which is not like me. I swerved to get out of his hold but he got me, hence this." Ziva pointed to her head while looking down at the ground tugging her lips to one side. "He had me against the wall… he was too strong. I could not…" Ziva was getting agitated and she shook the memories out of her head. She closed her eyes tightly and frowned, she blamed herself. Tony took her face between his hands and gently whipped a tear running down her cheek.

"Tony if you had not come, I would be dead." A small but weak smile tugged the corners of her mouth slightly as she gazed into his eyes. This was the first time she had smiled, although very small it made Tony happy.

"What do you mean if I hadn't come? I never saw you or him."

"When you screeched to a stop and slammed the car door like you did he looked out the window, saw you coming and took off. I do not understand why he did not just kill me, I mean he had the time but… he saw you and bolted." Ziva shook her head, still not believing her own story. "I grabbed some stuff and ran, I… I could not face you. I did not want to hurt you. I was going to leave, move just never come back, but when I saw your car I just, could not leave. That is when I just had to see you, I do not know why, but something made me come." Tony's lips curled upwards showing his big white teeth. Ziva loved when Tony smiled, it always made her feel warm inside and this made the next thing she said one of the hardest things she would ever have to do.

"I had to say goodbye."

This stopped Tony, his smile quickly faded and he felt his heart sink. The feeling he hoped to never feel again turned in his stomach. _Ziva… is leaving?_When Tony thought everything was going so well, that after this there may be a possibility of them being something more. After everything she had just said to him, he was crushed, stopped in his tracks. Ziva saw his face and the tears came streaming down, she lost control and what was a trickle down her cheeks became a river.

"Tony… I… I do not want to leave, I cannot stay… I just." Ziva could say no more, the words were now caught in her throat, she had just broken the heart of the man she loved. She got up and started to walk across the room swiftly, trying to get away while she could. She grabbed her backpack near the entry before she was caught around the wrist.

"Please Ziva; don't do this to me again." Tony pulled her close but was stopped by an outstretched hand on his chest. With tears streaming down her face Ziva stepped in and kissed Tony tenderly on the cheek. Before Tony got a chance to grab her, to pull her close, to kiss her passionately with his hands running through her hair, with their bodies pressed together and with the heat of the moment taking over. Before he got the chance to stop her.

She was gone.

**A.N: End of the chapter... just realised that this was much longer than the others so hopefully I didn't put too much detail in or whatever. DW There will be a happy ending for Tony and Ziva :) Just a little rough along the way haha this was such an enjoyment to write so Please send me some reviews cause they always help! Thankyou for reading :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**A.N: Finished the chapter finally! This felt like it took forever to write but was fun at the same time. It is very close to the climax if not starting in this chapter! Not so much Tiva but should be next chapter... Hope you all like it and I would reallly love reviews please! **

Ziva sat in the stairwell of Tony's apartment building. Her eyes were red and puffy; her throat was on fire and what felt like a stabbing pain went through her chest. She tried to get out of the apartment quickly, she tried to run from the pain but when the tears kept flowing and she could no longer breathe she had to stop. She was now curled into a ball against the wall, just as she was in Tony's bedroom earlier, and trying to breathe evenly to stop the pain in her chest. She had never felt quite like this before, sure she had been torched many times before; people have inflicted pain on her; but nothing like this. _People wonder why I try not to have feelings… Stupid!_ Ziva knew this would happen, as soon as she had let her guard down to… Tony. Ziva shook her head trying to get the thoughts out, to erase memories. No more. She knew she could never be truly happy in her life, her life would always be restricted… never normal. In Mossad having feelings was weak and now she understood why, _never again._

Ziva finally began to breathe normally and her tears were now dried up except for the few that fell in anger. She made her way down the rest of the stairs before exiting the building and making her way up the footpath gaining speed as she broke into a sprint, just to get away. She didn't know where she was going, she had no where safe to go, no one to go to, so she just kept running. She cleared her mind and just let the cool breeze come across her sticky, hot face. She had never felt so free… just running. The only thing that stopped her was when her phone vibrated in her pocket. The phone she pulled out was her old phone, one she hadn't used for a while. Infact it was only used in her Mossad missions. She looked at the tiny lit up screen which displayed a private number;_ should I answer it?_ After staring at the screen for a while her curiosity took over and she pushed the green phone key.

"Hello?" Ziva said in a questioning tone. It was a while before she got an answer, at first all there was to be heard was the steady breathing on the other end which sent shivers up her spine.

"Shalom Ziva, it is I. Anah." Ziva was in complete shock… the last time she had heard the smooth, heavily accented voice was 7 years ago on an undercover mission in Iraq.

"Anah, I thought you were dead! What is going on…" before Ziva could say more she was cut off by his stern voice.

"We cannot talk now Ziva, I will meet you at your apartment… we will talk then". Before she could protest there was a dial tone.

* * *

Ziva walked the all too familiar route to her apartment thinking of the million questions she needed to ask. The main one, 'How bad is it?' She knew that she was in danger and that someone was after her but how much they knew and how much development has happened over the past 7 years was unknown. Ziva finally got to her apartment in the early hours of the morning. Every light in her building was off except for the ones in her apartment, she knew it was Anah. Goosebumps covered her body at the same time as sweat trickled down her spine. She had missed Anah, he was a close friend… A VERY close friend at the time and she could not wait to see him again. Although the point of his visit was not for personal reasons but for much more serious ones she still felt nervous to see him and very excited. Just to have someone she could trust, someone that could help her and someone she was not worried about getting involved.

Ziva entered the elevator and pushed the round button with the number 5 engraved on it. She watched the numbers goes up as she ascended and when the doors finally opened with a soft 'ding' her heart was pounding in her chest. Walking over to her apartment door she pressed her cheek against it and listened… nothing. It had been an hour since Anah had called, Tony's house was farther then she thought, maybe he had just fallen asleep. Ziva opened the front door to her apartment and slid her backpack off her shoulder and dumped it inside the entrance with a soft thud. Turning herself around after closing the door she scanned her trashed living room expecting Anah asleep on her sofa… but as her eyes hovered over the place she realised it was empty.

"Anah?" No answer, no noise. Ziva started to get worried that he got sick of waiting and left. "Anah!" again no reply came from the quite apartment. Feeling quite disappointed that her friend had left she decided to take a hot shower to relieve the tension that had built up in her shoulders and neck. Ziva walked into her dark bedroom and almost made it into the bathroom when she fell face first into the ground. Ziva let out a scream as pain shot through her left wrist, she sat up on the ground and held her wrist tightly while trying to wiggle her fingers. They seemed to be moving slightly but with tremendous pain. _Not broken at least, but badly sprained…_ Ziva searched her brain to think what possibly could be lying on the floor in front of her. The light switch was on the other side of her bedroom so she tried to feel for the unknown obstacle. Feeling around in front of her she felt something cotton… _a shirt? _It wasn't until she felt something warm and sticky that she realised what or should I say who she tripped over. Ziva shot backwards towards the bed screaming as she leant back and put weight on her sprained wrist shooting pain up her arm. Rolling across to the other side of the bed she switched on her bedroom light. Blood covered her bed, the walls and the floor and the man. Her head started spinning and she tried to lean against the wall but missed smacking her head on the bedpost and going into darkness.

* * *

Tony stood at the open door that Ziva had sprinted out of. Tears rolled down his face as the pain and anguish built up inside. He couldn't believe she had done it again. He didn't know if he loved her or now hated her, he was just so angry and confused. Tony lost it as he grabbed the photograph of him and Ziva and through it across the room smashing it on the wall. _How could she do this! How could she give up like that? Does she care at all how it affects others? _Tony punched a good size hole through the wall as hatred began to stir inside him and resentment began to take over. Striding over to the TV unit on the other side of the room he started to throw the photos of Ziva on the ground. "_After everything I have done for her! I saved her ass in Somalia and this is how she says thanks!" _Tony was yelling everything that raced through his head; he could feel the anger build up more and more to the point where his head felt like it would explode. Smashed glass and photos covered the floor and Tony stood looking down at it with his hands so tightly balled up his knuckles were ghost white. Tony paced into the kitchen and grabbed a glass out of the cupboard slamming the door shut after. He grabbed a bottle of whiskey and poured a glass as he rolled his head around trying to relieve some of the tension. All he needed was alcohol, something strong. Changing his mind Tony left the glass and just took the bottle into the living room and sunk into the sofa where he drunk until he passed out into the late hours of the next morning.

Ziva woke up slowly, pain shooting through her head and wrist. Trying to get her bearings she looked at the wall where blood had been smeared and she then looked at her hands and her clothes covered in the same blood. Ziva tried to sit up only to violently vomit on her bedroom floor. The room was again spinning and her body was screaming at her in pain. She not only had the 6 centimetre gash across her forehead from last night's struggle but now had a even larger gash to the back of her head where she hit the bed post leaving her hair wet and sticky with her own blood. Ziva leant back against the bed waiting for her head to stop spinning before attempting to get up and walk across the bedroom. She slowly stood up putting her weight on the bed in front of her to see the man on the other side lying in a pool of his own blood. She noticed the multiple stab wounds as well as the single shot to his forehead. Now that it was light, she could recognise who the man was. She felt her stomach drop as the recognised the dark features and the long legs. It was Anah, her former partner. As she struggled to breathe she again threw up the content of her stomach, although most was now yellow bile for she had not eaten for days. Next to Anah laid a sheet of white paper, Ziva stumbled over and picked it up; when her vision was no longer blurry she began to read the neat hand writing.

**Miss David,**

**You know you cannot beat me, I know a lot about you and a very special friend of yours. **

**If you do not meet me on your roof top at 2200 tonight,**

**I then go after your very special Agent… Anthony DiNozzo.**

**Do not worry. I know everything about him as well. **

Chills went down Ziva's spine, _not Tony. _Ziva knew what to do straight away, she had no other choice.

**Finished! Poor Ziva I really beat her up haha but she is a tough one. I really would love to hear what you guys would like to happen next so please, any ideas! :) Reviews pease! :D**

**,Keely :o)**


	6. Chapter 6

**A.N: Hey! Thought that I wouldn't be able to get to this for another few days but its just my luck that I have the day off today! This is well... Im not quite sure how you would put it, again im sorry not much TIVA interaction but theres Ziva's thoughts and stuff about it. Next chapter thou! I promise. **

**I would like to say thanks to Zoyarose for your suggestion, I didnt end up going with it because this popped into my head haha but still it was a great idea! Although it would mean she would be leaving her family could you imagine how heartbroken poor abby would be! hahaBut I do hope you enjoy this idea as well... hopefully haha anyway pleaze read and review so I know how I am going! It really motivates me to write the next chapter quicker so yer! Enjoy my lovelys! **

Ziva's knife sliced the air across her living room and then stopped half was through the wall right angle to it. Ziva walked across to retrieve the knife so she could throw it again like she had been for the last hour. She glanced at the alarm clock on the end table under the window, its red digits glowing 21:55; it was time to go. She had never been so nervous in her life, she had gone into war zones and took apart armed bombs but she had never gone anywhere to give her life before. Yes, she could put up a fight, she could take down the man that stood on her roof but then they would go after Tony. She never thought she would but she now knows that she would sacrifice herself for the man she loved. Ziva decided that there was no point in taking her weapons, they would only be taken off her and would go to no use. So she put them on the coffee table alongside an envelope. She walked to the door and turned around to see her apartment for the last time. _This is it…_

_

* * *

_

Ziva stood at the top of the stairs with her hand on the door handle. She looked up at the sign on the door saying **'ENTRY TO ROOF'**. She did not know what to expect but she was hoping it would be fast, _no torture, just quick._ Slowly turning the handle she pushed the door open and a soft layer of rust fell, it was obvious that no one ever goes on the roof, _now I know why he chose the place. _Opening the door she saw a tall man with his back turned to her. She could see his boots and long black trench coat, he was bald and she could see the puffs of smoke floating up from his cigar.

"Shalom Miss David" The eerie voice slid out and Ziva felt herself hold her breath. He slowly turned around to face her and she noticed an all too familiar scar stretching down from his left temple to the edge of his jaw bone. The one that had been left from a knife Ziva had ripped down the side of his face. She felt pain in a similar scar down the side of her leg from where he had slashed her. The hairs on the back of her neck rose as she remembered the moment all too well. She remembered him getting away at the last moment as she tried to stop her femoral artery from pumping too much blood from the side of her leg. Ziva tried speaking but anger twisted inside her and her breath was caught in her throat. They both stood in silence for a while before she finally forced the words from her mouth.

"I should of finished you in Iraq" she spat through her teeth. A deep and menacing chuckle came from the man's throat as took the cigar from him mouth and while blowing out a puff of smoke, he put the cigar out by stepping on it. The man walked over to her swiftly grabbing her by her hair and holding her up. Ziva let out a cry as pain shot through her.

"This is what's going to happen tonight. You're going to be an obedient girl like your father raised you and we are going to have a little fun." Ziva's temper had already boiled over and she spat in his face.

"If that's what you want" said Ziva mocking him as a mischievous smile took over.

"Sharmotah!" The man slapped Ziva her across the face splitting her lip. Ziva let out a moan as he gripped her hair harder.

"What are you waiting for? Just kill me already". Ziva's voice was now being forced out of her throat which was on fire. Pain shot up her spine and her breaths were shallow a fast.

"Where is the fun in that?" Just as he said that he bent back Ziva's already sprained wrist and she screamed in agony. It was defiantly broken as she heard the snap inside her wrist. Tears welled at the rims of her eyes as she tried to block out the pain surging through her body. The man's lips twisted up in pleasure as his dark eyes stared deep into hers.

"Are we having fun now? Because I am…" Again Ziva got a blow to her face as she kneed him in the groin. Now he was the one in pain, he only got angrier as he pushed her hard against the wall behind her and his hand slid around her throat. Ziva heard a blood curdling scream and realised it was coming from her. Her head was throbbing and the pain was unbearable as her body starved for oxygen. She tried to block out the pain as she focused on the one thing she loved, the reason she was enduring this pain. Thinking back, she regretted instantly what she had said to him the other night and wished she could rewind and just tell him the truth; that she loved him and had always loved him. That at the moment he pulled up at her apartment and she saw her attacker recognise him that she knew she must leave him. That the man she loved was in danger. That it was the hardest thing she ever had to do, although not as hard as living alone in this world without him. The punishment she would put herself through if she ever let anything happen to him, if he ever got hurt… if someone took his life; and now she put herself through this just to spare his life. She felt pain as she thought about never seeing him again, never hearing his wise crack jokes and movie references. Never accidently rubbing hands, never accidently getting in each other's way or never coming a little closer than they should at work. She felt pain as she realised she would never feel him pressed against her, the passion as their lips moved together and they intertwined.

Next thing she knew she was on the ground, there was no hold around her neck, there was no one ripping the hair out of her head, she was untouched. The man looked at her; _this is not how it's meant to work… She looks almost serene. I want fear, pain, and suffering! _

"Get up!" He yelled at Ziva as he pulled her up by her hair and walked her to the edge of the building with his gun barrel pushed firmly into her back. Ziva limped over to the edge of the roof as she moaned in agony.

"Jump off the roof" he said nudging her a bit with the barrel of his gun. Ziva did not expect this and it showed in her face as a look of terror suddenly crossed it. He was making her kill herself and this changed everything. The man chuckled in delight as he realised he was once again in control.

"No!" Ziva stared deep into his eyes showing that she would never give in.

"Fine then, if you want to play it that way" The man leaned forward and again grabbed Ziva's wrist bending it back. Ziva's scream ripped out of her and echoed loudly from the roof top. She was wondering if anyone would be able to hear her but by where she was standing and with the walls positioned where they were she was doubtful. _This is it, I am now going to die with no explanation, and no one will find me. No one will know the real story. _Ziva knew that if anyone could find out what happened to her it would be Gibbs but she was doubtful, this was too far back for them to trace, she was too deep into something that was so secret she would carry it to the grave.

The man pulled his gun up to her and fired. The bullet entered her side and blooded started to seep through her clothes. She looked down at her hands which were not doing a good job of stopping the blood flow. She wondered if he was going to let her bleed to death or finish her off but when he walked away and started towards the door it was obvious that he was going to let her suffer. He shut the only door to the roof behind him and she heard the deadlock turned. She was locked outside, on a roof where no one could hear her. She knew it was defiantly the end for her.

She slid down the wall smearing blood all the way down until she was lying on her side clutching to the hole in the side of her abdomen. Although it didn't hit anything to crucial it was enough to make her bleed to death. She started to cough up blood and it came up through her raw throat making her choke and vomit violently. She tried to calm herself down and concentrate on her breathing and she let her eyes slip closed. She was lying still as she slowly started to slip out of consciousness; the pain was now starting to get dull as her breaths became shallower and less frequent. She felt herself slipping away, the pain slipping away. She felt a warm hand push against her side. She couldn't tell if she was in a dream or reality but she concentrated on the warmth of it as it spread through her. She felt another warm hand lift her head up and what felt like warm rain drops fall on the side of her face. She let herself slide deeper into the darkness as her memories and thoughts slowly began to fade. All she did was concentrate on the warmth in her body as she felt it caress her cheek whipping away the wetness. She felt the warmth completely surround her now as if she was in someone's arms and she felt peaceful. The last thing that went through her mind before slipping into completely darkness was Tony.

**A.N:**

**Sharmotah = one of the many ways to say 'Bitch' in Arabic.**

**That is all for this chapter, I decided to leave it there to keep everyone guessing what happens next because I know how you all love that :p Reviews would be lovely and keep checking for the next chapter because hopefully it will be a good one for all the TIVA fans out there!  
Shalom! xx**


	7. Chapter 7

**A.N: Hello lovelys, this is the 7th chapter and I still have sooo much more to write about! Thanks to all the lovely reviews I have recieved which modivated me to write this chapter even thou I have sooo much study to do! haha**

**I hope that this is ok because I wrote it over three periods and I had to try pick it up again where I left off... plus! I had a major blank on what to write in the middle of it! But this is what just came out so I hope its ok for youall :D Also Gibbs comes back for a little bit of this so yayayay although the main focus is still TIVA. It was quite difficult for me to write Tony in this manner because we haven't seen a very "devistated" Tony before in the show... so I hope I did ok :/ Anyway please telll me what you think It means the world! **

**Enjoy! xx**

Tony woke up groggy the next morning and quite unsure as to what exactly happened the night before. His head was pounding and he was sweating underneath the coffee coloured mink blanket that he was cocooned in. As the memories of last night slowly began to come back Tony forced his eyes shut hoping to fall back asleep so that he didn't have to face reality. _Ziva was gone. _

Tony's day went slow as he tried to keep his mind active so that he wouldn't think of painful thoughts, although it wasn't working very well. Even the latest issue of GSM magazine didn't keep him occupied and he soon gave up. Lying on the sofa staring at the ceiling, millions of questions ran through Tony's head. _Why did she leave? Could I of stopped her? Is she still in the country? _The last question was one Tony was sure he knew the answer. After last night's performance and the way she said goodbye he was sure that she would be far, far away and he couldn't help but run through the possibilities of where she might be. _She wouldn't go back to Israel, or anywhere near Iraq…Maybe she is stuck on an island somewhere… Gilligan's Island! _Tony chuckled softly at the thought but was still saddened at the thought she was gone.

It was 9pm that night and still Tony's thoughts were on Ziva. He walked around his empty apartment and stopped in his living room when he spotted the smashed photographs on the ground. Picking one up, he saw a picture that he took of a very annoyed Ziva in a bikini, reading a book. A smile crossed Tony's face as he remembered the moment he took the photograph. _Wow she looked hot, no not just hot… but beautiful. _Tony felt another stab of pain as he stared at the photograph in his hands. For the next half an hour he picked up each photo and remembered each moment as if it was yesterday. By the end of it, Tony was only feeling more down and he could feel that yet again it was time to drink the pain away. Tony walked into the kitchen but then remembered that his only bottle of whiskey was now empty on the living room floor. Grabbing his coat, keys, phone and gun he left his apartment and headed for the pub.

* * *

By 10 pm Tony had drunk enough to be slightly numb yet not completely out of it. Still thinking clearly he called it quits and walked out into the cool night air. He walked for the next 10 minutes with his thoughts somewhere else after gradually realising he was standing at a dark green wood door. The door was all too familiar to Tony… it was Ziva's front door. Unsure what to do Tony walked aimlessly up and down the hallway, _should I go in? Is that a very good idea? Probably not… but it could help me find out what happened to Ziva. Just to be safe… _

Tony turned the door handle and entered the dark apartment. Like Gibbs, Ziva didn't find it necessary to lock the front door, but I guess being an assassin and all it wasn't really necessary. Tony walked into the apartment and flicked on the lights. Again he saw the smashed glass, the books, the emptied draws and just the complete mess. Tony walked around the apartment just taking in the last memories of Ziva David; he made his way into the bedroom and switched on the lights without paying much attention to what he was doing. The light went from pitch black to a brightly lit room, but then he saw the blood… _so much blood._

Panic and worry set in as he surveyed the scene, he recognised the man on her bedroom floor. He remembered Ziva showing him the photo of herself and Anah Kishon. The only person fighting on Ziva's side (well the only man she was allowing to fight on her side…) was now dead on her bedroom floor. Where did that leave her? Tony assumed the worse and could feel the tears well in his eyes; he could not bear to see anymore. Tony stumbled into the living room where he saw Ziva's knife and gun on the coffee table. _Ziva would never leave without her weapons… _This only made Tony believe that his first assumption was defiantly correct. That it was not only Anah's blood in her bedroom, that she too was dead. Tony had felt this feeling before when Ziva was in Somalia, when he then too, thought she was gone. Although this time it felt worse, this time he was truly in love with her. This time he had a chance to stop her, protect her at his apartment. This time he felt it was entirely his fault.

Tony leant over and picked up Ziva's knife in his hand and ran his finger over its smooth edges and the engravings on its handle. He went to put it back on the table when he spotted it from the corner of his eye, a white envelope with his name written in fancy writing. It reminded him of the letter he received from Ziva last Christmas. The same fancy writing on the front. This was a letter for him… from Ziva, and he couldn't even bring himself to read it.

Tony's mind was blank as he stared at the envelope not daring to touch it. He couldn't believe she had left him a letter; just for him to read; no one else. He had no idea what possibly could be written inside with her stunning hand writing that he loved, he really wanted to know what it might say, but still he could not just reach out and grab it. He could feel his heart beat faster as he came closer to reading it; truthfully he was afraid of what it might say. He never really knew how she felt about him, he knew she was never for the relationships and it didn't help when he had killed her boyfriend. _Although none of it really matters now. She is… gone. _

Tony decided not to read it, he wasn't ready. So he picked it up and slipped it inside his coat. One day he would read it but the pain was too raw and he could not endure anymore at this time. Tony took Ziva's knife also, as a reminder. It was her favourite knife and he remembered her always playing with it as he watched her from across the bullpen. Again the pain tugged at him but he was now starting to ignore it, he would have to get use to it; because it would be there for a while. He finally stood up and took one last glance around the apartment before walking out slowly and closing the door behind him. As he was about to leave Tony heard gunfire faintly from above, unlike Tony the average person would never of recognised it to be gunfire as it was so quite, but being the senior field agent he is, Tony picked up its distinct sound and noticed it was coming from above.

Tony was running up the stairs, gun held by his two hands just below his waist. He heard the metal door close as he made it to the floor above. Although looking around he saw that this was not the floor where the shot was fired… to close it would have been louder. Tony continued up the stairs as he remembered Ziva mentioning to him one day about the roof on the top floor of her apartment building. Coming around the last bend the metal door was in sight and he stopped in front of it and listened carefully. He could hear moaning and then a blood curdling scream that sent a chill down his spine. _It couldn't be… ZIVA!_

Tony unlocked the door and rammed into it but it wouldn't budge the door was stuck. Again and Again he tried getting more agitated and distressed that he couldn't get to Ziva on the other side. As he went on he could no longer hear her and this only made him try harder. Finally the door swung open and he saw the lifeless body on the ground.

Blood covered the wall behind her and it was pooled on the ground around her, he saw the blood trickling from the back of her head and he saw the new gashes that lined her face. These were all cuts, not bullet wounds, maybe she was ok... Tony quickly ran over to her and slid to his knees he saw her swollen wrist as she clutched to her side, blood seeping through. She wasn't lucky enough. She was unconscious and barely breathing, the blood was drained from her face leaving her skin pale and her lips purple and swollen. Tony took his shirt off and pressed it against the bullet wound trying to stop the blood leaking from her side but in less than a minute it was soaked through. With one hand still firmly on her side tony grabbed his phone and dialled 911.

The ambulance was on its way and Tony decided he would call Gibbs once the paramedics arrived. Tears rolled down Tony's cheeks as he looked at the lifeless body, her chest barely rising and falling. Tony lifted her head and pulled her close into his lap, he just needed to hold her, maybe for the last time. He wished he could just look into her deep brown eyes one last time and see her delicate smile. He longed to hear her laugh and her funny sayings that he never got tired of. But now all he could see was an empty void, a form that rested in his arms, cold and pale. Ziva was no longer inside, it was just a shell. Tony could feel his world fall apart, until the last few days he never realised that he depended so much on her, that he felt so much for her, that he could not live without her. Even if she didn't feel the same way about him, as long as she was happy and safe, he would be satisfied.

Ziva's body heaved one last time before her heart gave in, her chest stopped moving and her pulse was gone. Tony just held her close as he cried into her hair. The world around him had completely stopped; he no longer noticed anything around him including the paramedics who had just arrived. Next thing he knew she was being ripped out of his arms, he tried to hold tighter but he was now being restrained. Ziva was now far away from him as he got dragged backwards and he saw the men rip off her shirt and start CPR. Tony was now being ushered off the roof… forcefully.

"No, Ziva, no, no…" was all Tony could choke out. He tried to push through the men but they were too strong. Who were they to stop him from being with her? But in the state he was in Tony was too weak to fight and could only mutter Ziva's name while trying to see past them. The last thing he saw was the three paramedics working on her and her lifeless face before he was taken off the roof.

* * *

"Sir I need you to calm down and let us do our jobs." Said the tall middle aged paramedic to Tony who was now sitting in the stairwell. Tony could not even get words out so he just nodded weakly while staring at the ground. "We will do everything we can, but I can't promise anything. We will tell you if anything happens." Tony looked up at the paramedics face, just from his face he knew the situation was dire and he didn't have very high hopes. Again Tony just nodded and the paramedic walked back out onto the roof. Tony closed his eyes and lent his forehead on the cool concrete wall… just waiting. It felt like ages for Tony as he waited for the paramedic to return and when he heard footsteps he look up immediately just hoping; but to his surprise it wasn't the paramedic but Gibbs. Gibbs was defiantly not his normal self, Tony noticed that his normal stern, brave look was now replaced with a look filled with anticipation and worry. He sat down on the stairs next to Tony without saying a word and the two men waited for what felt like eternity. After another half an hour it started to finally sink in that she wasn't coming back. Tony had lost hope; he knew that after half an hour of CPR the chances of bringing someone back were next to nothing. Tony looked up at his Gibbs and could see the pain in his eyes, the pain of losing another daughter. He put his hand on Gibbs shoulder and gave a weary smile.

"I'm sorry Tony" said Gibbs in reply and for once they both let rule #6 slide this one time as Tony said sorry back. Tony got up and to leave, the pain was too much to stay and there was not much he could do. As he started to walk down the staircase he heard the door to the roof open and close.

"Mr DiNozzo!" said the paramedic as he paced down the stairs to reach Tony with Gibbs not far behind. "Mr DiNozzo… she is breathing again."

**A.N: OK! FINISHED! Im not quite sure when I will get the next chapter up but it should be pretty sooon :) I hope you all liked it and please review! Im sorry to be annoying and keep saying that but the reviews help me sooo much!  
**

**CYA! :)  
**


	8. Chapter 8

**A.N: Ok so it took me forever to do this one! it is a little longer then chapters 1 and 2 together I worked out so its quite a bit longer but I had so much to write! haha Its amazing how you plan to write something but when you start writing it your imagination takes over and you almost write something completely diffferent! This is what has happened so I hope it all turned out ok in the end... Please enjoy reading it and telll me what you think whether that be a review or pm doesnt matter... Thankyou!**

It had been hours, but Tony forced himself to stay awake. He was now sitting in the waiting room of Bethesda hospital with Gibbs, Ducky, Abby and McGee and not a word was being spoken. Abby lent against McGee sobbing quietly and Gibbs just sat bent over clenching and unclenching his fists. Ducky sat next to Gibbs taking his glasses off and rubbing underneath his eyes, while McGee just stared at the wall. The team was distraught and broken. A member of their family was fighting for her life behind closed doors and none of them could help her. The only thing to do was wait.

It was now 2am in the morning, almost 4 hours after he had found her on the roof and still there had been no news. Although they got her breathing again it had been touch and go from there; with her heart stopping numerous times on the way to the hospital as Tony clutched her hand in the back of the ambulance. As his eyes began to close, he heard footsteps coming from down the long concrete hallway which leads to ICU. Tony stood up as the short brunette nurse walked towards them, with no emotion on her face.

"She is stable at this time, but she still has a long way to go. She won't be able to have visitors if she recovers until tomorrow morning at least so I would suggest going home and getting some rest." The whole lot of them looked disappointed at the lack of good news but nodded wearily at the young nurse. "I will call if anything changes" she finally said before giving a sympathetic smile and exiting the room. Everyone stayed quite not making eye contact until Gibbs broke the silence and told everyone to go home. No one argues with Gibbs… Tony looked down the corridor to ICU before turning and leaving the hospital. Tony thought that there was no hope for sleep tonight but as soon as his head hit the pillow his body took over and got what it needed.

* * *

_Ziva was lying dead in Tony's arms, his tears falling on her face a he held her tight wishing for her just to breathe again. _

_She was now being pulled away into the darkness, he tried to reach for her but couldn't move; he tried to yell her name, but he couldn't speak._

_An evil laugh surrounded him, and he was desperately trying to look around to see where it was coming from; and then he saw it._

_A man in a dark cloak held Ziva in his arms, her lifeless body hung there as her blood ran off her onto the ground. He could not see the mans face; it was hidden beneath the hood of his long black cloak._

_He looked down to see her blood all over him, and again the wicked sound came from him as he laughed maliciously. _

_Tony tried to run towards Ziva but he was carrying her away from him further and further into the darkness. _

_Tony was stuck, he couldn't move, he couldn't save her. He tried to yell for her but again no sound came out. _

_She was gone and there was nothing he could do… _

_

* * *

_

"ZIVA!"

Tony woke up panting and sweating all over. He was confused and it took him a while to wake up fully. _It's only a dream… Ziva is still alive, I hope._ The sun poured through the crack in the blinds and he turned over to look at the clock, 8:27 am. He got out of bed and threw on his clothes in a panic to get to the hospital.

When arriving to ICU he picked up the phone outside the door and waited until the call went through to the nurses' station.

"ICU, how may I help you?" said a chirpy voice form the other end of the receiver.  
"I am here to see Ziva David" Tony waited what felt like eternity before a nurse opened the door and walked out. He realised it was the same young nurse from last night and she looked frazzled and not very inviting.

"Hi Mr DiNozzo, I have been expecting you. Her condition is stable but she is in a coma, I don't think…"

"Please…" said Tony to the nurse pleading with his eyes. She stared at him for a while before letting out a deep breath and giving a tight nod.

"OK… but please be careful around the equipment and only you are allowed in" He nodded in agreement before following the nurse through the door and into ICU. After washing his hands thoroughly the nurse walked him down a small corridor before pointing at a room with glass walls. He could see the end of the bed but not her face and he just stood there hesitantly not knowing what to expect. His heart was now in overdrive and he was sure everyone within ICU could probably hear it pounding against his chest. He slowly approached the door and closed his eyes before taking a deep breath and rounding the corner.

What he saw was upsetting to say the least. His eyes followed the tubes that helped her breathe as he looked up at her purple bruised face. You would think that when a person is unconscious they would look peaceful, but not Ziva. She looked as if she was fighting a battle in her head, she looked in pain and he just wished he could save her from her own mental state. The quite was eerie besides the beeping of the various machines feeding her, keeping her hydrated, keeping her breathing and keeping her alive. Pulling a chair next to her bed Tony sat down and held her hand in his resting his forehead on it. Her skin was warm again unlike the ice cold it was when he had found her last night. At least this was a good sign.

Tony sat there holding her hand and gently stroking her face. He had lost track of time but knew it had been a while. Now that he knew she was with him for now he decided it was time. Reaching into his coat he pulled out a white envelope with his name written in black ink. Admiring the writing he looked at the front of it for a while before finally turning it over and opening it with Ziva's knife he had from her apartment. Putting the knife back into his pocket he then slid the thick piece of paper out of the envelope and started to read the long hand writing:

_**Tony,**_

_**If you have this letter it means I am most likely dead. I would like to start off by saying… I am sorry.**_

_**This hardly seems fair after what I have put you through since we met, but I am unsure of what else to say. I am no good at these things. **_

_**What I did to you the other night, what had been said. I want you to know that it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do, and I have done a lot of unpleasant things to say the least. You see, I was not completely open and truthful about the events that took place the night my apartment got trashed. I said he just took off when he saw you and I did not know why he left me alive; but the truth is, I do. He was not sent to kill me, he was just the messenger. The message he brought me was what led me to do what I did in your apartment that night. His message was about you. I knew what would happen to me, but if it meant sparing your life… it is what I had to do. This is not your fault, and I want you to promise me not to take the blame, it was my choice and there was nothing you could do.**_

_**I did not think twice about my choice, because without you… I don't think I could go on. You have always had my back Tony and I am so very thankful. Although it may seem I have thrown my life away after you came to rescue me in Somalia, I want you to know it was not a waste. The time since then has been cherished and it has made me realise things I would never have thought about. Since you came to my rescue, I would wake up and think how lucky I am. It has made me see things about the world and the people in it that I would never have been able to see. When you saved me in the desert, I knew who I could really count on. **_

_**I am truly sorry how things have turned out; please tell everyone that I loved them dearly, that they were my real family. Please take care of Abby for me Tony, for I know she will be quite upset, especially after also losing Kate. Tell her that she was a baby sister to me and that I loved her dearly. Tell McGee that he was a brother to me and that I wish him the best in the future… I know he will get everything he ever dreamed of. Tell Gibbs that he was the father I never had and without him… I would never have learnt so much about myself, I would have continued to be what Eli brought me up to be… a killer. Give my love to Ducky and thank him for always being there for me, his knowledge is such a gift, I have learnt so much from him. Also send palmer my love, tell him he will be truly great in the future and I wish him all the best. And tell yourself to stay strong and know that I regret that things that were unsaid between us. I hope you know how I truly felt, and that will never change. You are kind, gentle and loving. I loved your joking personality and how you always seemed to make me smile, no matter my mood. Do not change yourself one bit, you are perfect. Please stay safe for me and I wish you all happiness.**_

To my partner, my friend and my love,

_**Shalom, Ziva.**_

_Things unsaid between us? My love… _Tony smiled as he read the words over and over. The tears streamed down his face were a mixture between sadness of almost losing the women he loved, and happiness of how lucky he was to still have her. He pieced together the puzzle in his head and understood what had happened; he instantly felt bad for the anger he had towards her, she was doing it for him. He couldn't believe that she would actually hand herself over to an assassin just to save him. He still held Ziva's hand in his and he leant over to kiss her palm. Her sweet aroma filled his lungs and he was happy. She still had a long way to go, but for now, she was alive and she was fighting.

* * *

"How long until she wakes up?" Gibbs asked the doctor as him and Tony stood outside Ziva's room.

"It is hard to say, she could wake up today or 3 months there is no way really to know. It also depends on whether they want to wake up." Tony raised his eyebrows questioning the doctor's last statement.

"What do you mean 'wants to wake up'?" The doctor looked up as he thought about how he could put it to the two agents.

"Well, she had been attacked severely so it depends on the mental state she is and how traumatic the attack was on her. Besides this have there been any other past traumatic events?" The two agents looked at each other deciding whether to answer the doctor's question truthfully. Gibbs nodded and Tony began to explain.

"She was held hostage for three months about a year ago in Somalia, she almost died." The doctor took note of this and then hummed as he took it in.

"This most defiantly could change the time she stays in a coma, it seems like she has been through a lot." The three of them looked over at Ziva before the doctor smiled at them and started to walk off. He had only gotten a few meters away before an ear piercing scream came from Ziva's room and the three of them were in there instantly.

Tony made it to Ziva first and held her close, to his amazement she pushed him away and a look of terror filled her eyes.

"Ziva, it's me, it's Tony"

"No, no, no, stay away from me, please don't hurt me!" This broke Tony's heart to hear her so terrified of him and he didn't understand.

"Ziva, you are safe… it is Tony." Ziva was now standing in the corner of the room, her ET tube was taken out and she had ripped the I.V from her arm. Tony slowly walked around the bed and looked deep into her eyes. He walked right up to her arms spread wide and she looked up at his face.

"Tony?" she asked him dazed.

"Yes, it's just me you are safe."

"Tony, I am so sorry… I thought…" This is all she could say before she collapsed into Tony's arms. He held her close and sat down on the ground letting her down. In the background he could hear the doctor call for backup and Gibbs was just standing there shocked at what he had just encountered. Leaning down Tony kissed Ziva on the forehead as she half consciously moved closer into him. _Why was she so scared of me? What had she seen? _He looked up at the doctor, face full of worry; he was met by a confused face as the doctor scratched his head.

"I don't know what happened, it's like she is caught in her memories. Whatever happened, she is continuing to relive it." Tony just stared at the doctor who was still trying to figure out what to do with her. He only just noticed that Gibbs had left the room and there were now 2 new faces as another doctor and a nurse had come into the room. Again Tony was being ushered out as Ziva was taken from his arms. He stood looking through the glass wall as the doctors put her on oxygen and monitored her vitals as the nurse fixed up the IV.

"You really love her don't you" said a voice behind him. Tony jumped as Gibbs walked around to stand beside him watching through the glass. He thought about this for a moment, hoping he wouldn't get yelled at by his boss for breaking rule #12.

"Yes Boss, I do. And I know what you are going to say about rule #12 but I couldn't help it so please not now." He was stopped by a famous Gibbs head slap as Gibbs looked at him frustrated.

"Tony I was going to say, I hope you get the chance to tell her how you feel." Tony was surprised by this, he look at his boss as if he was just asked a trick question. Gibbs continued, "I saw it coming DiNozzo, those rules I make are guidelines, but I knew this was going to happen and that I wouldn't be able to stop it." Gibbs turned back towards the glass to watch the doctors work on Ziva. "You two are different. Normally sexual tension and relationships do not work in a partnership, but infact, you two work better." Gibbs shook his head and laughed at a completely stunned Tony.

"Uh, jeez… thanks Boss".

"I better get back to NCIS, who knows what McGee is doing to my computer" Tony chuckled at this and then looked up to see a large grin on his Boss' face also, and with that he was gone.

Tony smiled at the thought of what just happened; Gibbs had been nice to him… and laughed! He watched as Ziva thrashed about suddenly and was trying to get up. She looked distressed and again he became worried.

"Mr DiNozzo, can you please come in here, she is quite agitated and keeps asking for you." The nurse ducked back into the room again quickly and he followed her in and walked over to Ziva. Tony saw Ziva's face screwed up as she moaned and rolled her head from side to side. He took her hand and she gripped it tight.

"She is just going through a lot of pain at the moment, but it won't be too long before the pain killers kick in" Tony looked up and nodded at the doctor.

"She is very strong" said the nurse looking at him; "If I were her I would defiantly be screaming a lot more" She smiled at Ziva who was not paying attention. Her eyes were now fixed onto Tony's face as she gripped his hand so hard that he could feel the blood circulation being cut off. He didn't mind one bit but because he had his Ziva back, alive. They both stared into each other's eyes and Tony smiled down at her. She didn't return the smile, which was understandable with the pain she was in, but when her eyes rolled into the back of her head and she sunk back into the pillow it was obvious that something more was wrong.

**A.N: Ok so I was going to cut this chapter shorter about half way through but something told me to keep going + it means you don't have to wait for another update so I hope you liked it! I would really appretiate reviews especially on this chapter! I am not sure where I will be going after this but dw I wont cut it off short. We still have to find the person that has done tis to her! haha so until next time! **

**Shalom, Keely :o)**


	9. Chapter 9

_Her eyes fluttered open to see a man before her, his face was close to hers and she could smell the sickening mixture of tobacco and Caf Pow as he breathed in her face. She tried to shrink away but he had a hold of her; she tried to lash out at him, just trying to be free. Tears ran down her face as she pleaded with him not to hurt her again but all she got was a disturbing chuckle escape his pale cracked lips. She continued to struggle against the man but he only gripped her harder… closer. She then started to fade into the blackness again before a bright light entered and she could see a blurry figure above her. She fought against the figure, trying to get away but it was no use. She heard her name faintly and the voice sounder all too familiar but she just couldn't reach it. Finally the blurriness disappeared and she was shocked to see the man with her._

_

* * *

_

"Ziva, Ziva it's ok, it's just me, Tony, your partner. You are safe" Tony was holding her down to the hospital bed as she struggled beneath him. He had to hold her down so she wouldn't hurt herself more or rip out her IV again for the second time in a row. He could see the tears stream down her cheeks as she still fought against him. The scary part was that her eyes were open, she was looking at him yet she was still trapped in her head. She started to calm down as her eyes fixed on Tony's face, he let go of her wrists and took her hand in one of his as he caressed her face with the other. She flinched away from the soft touch to her face and Tony dropped his hands and sat next to her bed looking away.

"I am sorry" she murmured when she caught her breath and he looked up at her face again. A weak smile crossed his lips but vanished again just as quickly. She could tell that it hurt him, flinching away like that, but she couldn't bring herself to just letting him touch her. She felt so weak already for being so venerable, this is the only wall she had left standing, between her and Tony. She thought about what he was feeling; how much did she hurt him and how does he feel about her? _Is he only here because I am his partner? _Ziva did not want a relationship, sure she liked Tony a lot more then friends, infact, she loved him; but every time she gets close to someone, something bad happens; take michale for example, he ended up dead. She also remembered rule number 12, Gibbs would never allow a relationship between two of his team members and she wouldn't want it to cause the team to split up; her life was her job and her family are her co-workers. She decided the best thing to do is to avoid intimacy, otherwise she would get attached and it would only be harder to reject him each time. Even the smallest things made her like Tony even more, just like how he caressed her face; flinching away was her immediate reaction to stop her feelings from getting away from her, she just had to bottle them up and hope they will go away.

"Ziva… What is it that you keep seeing?" Tony finally broke the silence in the room and she looked up at him with a pained expression on her face. It was obvious that she couldn't talk about it but he just waited to see what she would say.

"I… please, not now Tony" She looked away as she said this not trusting herself to see his reaction. She started to have the vivid memories of Somalia flash through her head and she forced her eyes shut in attempt to remove them, she was finally snapped out of the phase when a worried voice came from next to her and she looked up to see his eyes fixed on her face.

"I am fine, I just need to rest" she said this implying for him to leave and he nodded once before exiting the room without another word. The awkwardness between them was noticeable and she felt relieved to once again have the room to herself. She rolled over in attempt to sleep but her brain was too active and she ended up running through everything that was happening. She thought about the mood between the two of them; _it had never been like this before, what has changed? oh yer, everything. Will it ever be the same?_

**_A.N: Hey sorry about how short it is! I decided to update with what I had because I am not sure when I can update it again. It may be like tonight again or it may not be for a few days I am not sure :S Hopefully I will get the chance soon but :) I would love to thank everyone for their reviews and messages it has really helped me :) I can't wait for more, and please if you have any suggestions about this fic or just about my writing in general I am all ears! :D_**

**Do not worry about Tiva, they will get better :) I just didnt want to rush the story like them all of a sudden they are together and it is so easy because It is not, and I think you can tell this when watching the show. To me a story is not interesting if its not rough along the way so please tell me what you think! I will try to continue writing now and see how I go... I might updat again a bit later tonight we shall see :P**

**Thankyou for reading so far...**  
**Keely :o)**


	10. Chapter 10

**A.N: OK, so it didnt take as long as I thought to update again haha. I started writing and then I decided just to keep going, but now I am super tired! argh. Anyway I hope this is OK because I am really quite tired haha. So please tell me what you think because I am really not sure :)**

It is 2 weeks after Ziva was admitted to Bethesda and she could finally go home. After going through discharge and reassuring the doctor that she will take care of herself and take the medication he gave her; she walked out into the sunlight and breathed in the fresh air. She heard a car horn and looked up to see Gibbs waiting across the parking lot for her. He had decided that she would stay with him until the guy that had put her into hospital was caught. She had no say in the matter but was thankful for the company of the father figure in her life, she needed him more than ever now and she was relieved to see him waiting for her at the hospital. Her relationship with Tony had withered after what had happened and he would come to visit now and then with Abby and McGee but there wasn't much spoken. After she had shut him down she was not surprised, she only hoped that it was for the best.

Ziva made it to the passenger door and slid into the car, Gibbs had already gotten her stuff for her and a million black roses form Abby covered the back seat. Ziva laughed quietly as she saw the many roses and Gibbs leaned over and kissed her temple.

"How are you feeling?"

"Great, I am just happy to get out. I hate hospitals." She gave a small frown at the last part and he laughed at the thought of what would happen if she hadn't been so weak the last couple of weeks. She would probably have broken out and gotten far away if she could.

"We noticed you didn't like hospitals, you have been complaining the whole time." She gave an apologetic smile as he put the car into gear and pulled out of the car park. The conversation on the way to Gibbs' house was mainly about what had happened at NCIS since she was away and he noticed that the topic of 'Tony' was purposely avoided by the both of them. He wasn't quite sure what had been said between them or what had happened, but he knew that something was wrong and he decided he would talk about it to her later. For now he decided to let it slide as she was the happiest she has been since it all began almost 3 weeks ago.

* * *

Walking into Gibbs' House she walked over to the couch to dump her stuff.

"No, no, you are in my room. I am taking the couch." She started to protest but was cut off by a weak, playful head slap. She laughed at the thought of not getting one of those in a long time and decided that she would never win the argument of 'who gets to sleep on the couch'; So with a sigh, she picked up her bag and walked into the main bedroom, well… the only bedroom. Walking in she noticed that some of her stuff had been brought over from her apartment and hung neatly in the wardrobe, the bed was turned down and a towel lay on the end of the bed.

"Very nice, I could get use to this" she said as Gibbs walked up behind her. She heard a soft chuckle before she was by herself in the room. She felt more at home then she has ever felt and she smiled at the thought of having a real family always there for her. Getting changed she walked into the kitchen to look in the fridge, _nothing._ Looking at the clock she thought about where the nearest grocery store was and grabbed her coat. Yelling down the stairs to the basement, she told Gibbs she was grabbing some food for dinner and headed out.

* * *

Gibbs walked up from the basement as he smelt the smell of onion, garlic, chicken and wine. Walking into the kitchen Ziva stood by the stove mixing together a pot full of ingredients.

"That smells great, what is it?" He was now leaning over her shoulder looking into the pot and the corners of her mouth tugged upwards.

"It is Coq au Vin"

"You cook French?" He was slightly surprised by this; he would never imagine Ziva as a brilliant cook as well, although she did seem to be good at pretty much everything.

"Yes, I cook a lot of things, Cooking takes my mind off things" Gibbs raised an eyebrow in question and she gave a small smile.

"It does not mean I only cook when I am trying to get my mind off things, I do love to cook." They both laughed at this and it wasn't long before they were seated at the small, dimly lit dining room table with the tasty meal in front of them.

"This is delicious Ziva, I have not had a decent meal like this for ages" he said rubbing her hand. She gave a smile as a thankyou as she ate and until they were finished there was silence. When they had both finished she got up and cleared the plates. Gibbs followed her into the kitchen with their glasses and helped her scrape.

"I could get use to this, what's for breakfast" They both laughed at this as the last of the scraps were scraped into the bin. "If you don't mind Ziva, I would like to talk to you after." Ziva had been waiting for this but she hoped that it wasn't so soon. She swallowed hard before turning to him and nodding with a weak smile. He sensed her fear as she continued to clean up and he realised she was dreading this conversation, although he was sure she didn't know what it was going to be about.

After all the dishes were washed, dried and put away, the two of them sat in the lounge room on the sofa and Ziva started to fear the worse. Thoughts about her panic attacks and her mental state came to mind, she expected him to get her to talk about her thoughts, her feelings and about the dreams she has been having, about Somalia. This was not going to be easy she thought to herself, but as soon as he started to talk she was completely thrown off guard to what the conversation was actually going to be about.

"What happened between you and Tony, Ziva?" She had no idea how to answer this, it was completely unexpected… _Tony? Why would he want to talk about me and Tony?_

"I don't know… nothing I guess, we just stopped talking".

"Ziva, when has Tony ever stopped talking, especially to you?" This really had her confused, _what is he implying? That Tony would talk more to me because we had something? This is not the Gibbs I know"_

"Why are we talking about this? Tony and I are just partners and that is how it will always be. Just like rule # 12"

"Ziva… Tony has not been himself lately, he has been down. Now please, what happened?" She thought about this, _would he be angry at Tony if I told him, would he be angry at me? We would be partially breaking his rule. _After a while she figured that he would know if she wasn't telling him the truth so she decided to just tell him.

"Tony… Tony was being, more than just… a partner" Ziva paused as she thought of how to put it. "He was just being caring and I, I stopped him. Maybe I came across as if I do not like him, but. I do not want to be in a relationship with him, look what happened to Michael. Tony shot him! I do not want to put him in danger or anything; this is how this whole thing started." Gibbs held her hand as she spoke to him at the same time she was also sorting out her thoughts aloud. This is what Gibbs wanted and when she stopped talking he decided to tell her what he had told Tony 2 weeks ago.

"Michael was different, he was using you. Tony was being the good partner, you know that right?"

"Yes, I know that Michael was using me, just like my father; but Look at what has just happened. If anything ever happened to him, I would just. I could not live with it." He could see the pain in her eyes as she spoke and knew that the whole experience had taken its tole.

"Ziva" He waited until she looked up at him before he continued staring into her eyes, making sure the message gets across. "You cannot live your life afraid. Tony can take care of himself, he knows what has happened and it is not your fault. I want you to know it is not your fault. You are letting these people who have hurt you run your life. Is that what you want?" Tears ran down her cheeks as she shook her head slowly from side to side. A small smile appeared as she realised a weight had been lifted, one that she didn't know existed; Guilt.

"But, what about your rules. Are you trying to get me to consider Tony?"

"I will tell you what I told Tony 2 weeks ago. Those rules I make are guidelines, I knew that you two would get together at one stage, you were like magnets. I made that rule because I know what it is like to get into a relationship with your partner, and it normally doesn't work; but you and Tony whether you guys know it or not have been in a kind of… non-physical relationship for some time; and I must say it has the opposite effect on your partnership. You work much better; your partnership is much stronger. Hell, I would rather you two together; look at what happened with Tony and Jeanne." Ziva sat there, shocked. She would never have even dreamt of those words coming out of his mouth. It was not like him, but right now he was not being Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs, he was being the father she never had.

"I don't think he feels like that about me, well at least not now after what I have done."

"I don't know Ziva, that's not what he told me" He leaned over and kissed her on the head before leaving, he didn't want to say anymore. That was now up to her and Tony.

**A.N: TADA, Fin! Only the chapter but :P Still have alot more in store so stay tuned :) also I hope that chapter was OK and that you enjoyed it, would love feedback and I hope you all have a lovely day/night whatever time zone your in :)**

**Bye!**


	11. Chapter 11

The elevator doors opened to the familiar scene of a busy office. Ziva walked out of the elevator with her backpack on one shoulder, ready to work. This was the first time in weeks that she had been back to work and she couldn't be happier, she needed something to do, to keep her mind of things; and what's better then a case. She walked into the bullpen to see three pairs of shocked eyes, one slightly annoyed.

"I thought I told you to stay home Ziva." Gibbs walked up to her and rested a hand on her shoulder, still the father figure rather than her boss.

"I am bored, there is nothing to do" she said looking around agitated that he wouldn't just let her get back to work.

"You only got out of hospital yesterday."

"I am fine, Gibbs. Please I need to do something I was in that hospital for weeks." He looked at her unconvinced, "I am fine".

"Fine, but if you start feeling…" he was then cut off by the frustrated 'I know, you keep telling me' voice of Ziva.

"I know, I know, I will tell you. I promise" and with this she walked behind her desk, dumped her bag and sat in the chair she had missed all too much. She looked up across the walkway to where Tony sat typing away into his computer. He had not said a word to her, and this started to freak her out. Normally she would come in and have a witty statement or question thrown at her, or even a cheesy grin. But not now, he would not even lift his eyes to look at her and it made her all the more uncomfortable. She thought back to the conversation she had with Gibbs last night and was questioning what he had said. _When I said I don't think he likes me anymore, and then he said "that's not what he told me". What is that suppose to mean? I thought maybe… Well it doesn't seem that way._

_

* * *

_

The day moved slowly and Tony, McGee and Ziva sat at their desks doing overdue paperwork. Nothing had been said between them except for a bit of small talk between McGee and Ziva about how she had been.

"Grab your gear, dead marine" Gibbs flew around the corner, coffee in hand, to his desk where he grabbed his badge and gun. The other three did the same and when they were all about to walk out a hand on Ziva's shoulder stopped her short.

"Not you Ziva", she started to protest but was cut off with a firm "No" by Gibbs. When he says no, there is no fighting him. She dropped her bad and fell back into the office chair with a not so impressed look on her face. After letting out a large sigh, the other three left the bullpen and entered the elevator. Again there was nothing to do, and she started to think she would be better off at Gibbs' house. At least she could get some sleep. After 5 minutes she had had enough of staring at the computer screen and went down to visit Abby.

* * *

"Ziva! Ziva! Welcome backkk!" Abby ran across the lab in her knee high platform boots, taking quick small steps before having her in a bear hug. "Oh my god I have missed you so much!" She smiled as she embraced Abby's hug. "What do you need?"

"I do not need anything, what makes you think I need something?" she gave a confused expression and Abby laughed.

"I don't know, you came down to my lab, I just thought you wanted to know something about the case. Although I don't have anything yet, but anyway. So why did you come down?"

"The others went out to the crime scene, and I got stuck here. I was just bored." Ziva walked around the lab as she said this and Abby's eyes followed her. "Hey do you mind if I borrow you hippo?"

"Umm… Sure, why do you need him?"

"I would like to have a bat nap, if you don't mind."

Abby broke out into laughter at this and she got a confused look from her. "It is a cat nap, and sure. You can sleep in the back room." Ziva smiled, took the Hippo and walked into the back room where she laid on the large mental table and fell asleep within only a few minutes.

* * *

"Got some stuff from the crime scene for you Abbs" Tony walked into the lab with a plastic white evidence box. Abby didn't even look up from the computer screen when replying.

"Put it on my desk, I'll get to it soon." He walked through the sliding glass doors into the next room whilst whistling the tune 'Somewhere over the rainbow' before stopping suddenly at the sight of a figure in the middle of the room. Her chest moved up and down with each steady breath as she laid their silently asleep. He didn't move, just stood there watching her, wondering if she was really asleep. He thought about the many times he thought she was asleep at her desk so he would throw something at her and she would turn ninja and catch it, before pegging it back at him. He gently put the evidence box on Abby's desk and walked over to where Ziva was asleep on the table. He looked at the scars that were just starting to fade on her face and he had flashbacks of the night in his apartment, the way she left him standing at his door; heartbroken and alone. Although he had tried to get over her, it was impossible and what Gibbs had said to him that day in the hospital proved that. But somehow things went wrong and she pushed him away; well he thinks she did. Emotions came back to him which he worked so hard on keeping away, this is the reason he tried to avoid her all day and barely saw her since the hospital. He loved her, but the feelings didn't seem to be mutual to him.

"Tony?" He swung around to see Abby standing in the doorway with a questioning look on her face. "Tony, are you ok?"

"Uh, yes. I just didn't see Ziva and I was making sure I hadn't waked her" He smiled at her before the two of them exited the room.

As Abby started the fingerprint search on AFIS, Tony waited impatiently on the stool next to her. He was not his usual self, talking all the time, and Abby noticed. She was about to question him when Ziva walked into the room and stretched her arms above her head while she yawned. Both of them looked up to watch her as she made her way to where they were sitting. Abby looked back to the monitor but Tony's eyes never left her face; Ziva was half way across the room when she suddenly stopped walking and closed her eyes.

"Ziva? Are you alright?" Ziva let out a moan as her hands worked on her temples and next thing he knows, she was lying on the ground, unconscious.

"Ziva!"

**A.N: Dum, dum dahhh. OK its not that dramatic but I need it to lead to the next part of the story (which you will see in the next chapter :D) I hope you all liked it and thanyou again to those who reviewed! **

**Peace out, Keely :o)**


	12. Chapter 12

_Red, frozen liquid pooled on the ground as the plastic cup hit the floor. Footsteps pounded the ground from one side of the room to the other before they stopped and knees hit the ground beside the body._

"Ziva!" Gibbs was next to her before Abby and Tony could even react. Tony saw her body heave up and down and looked like she could barely breathe, although he couldn't see her face. He rushed over to where Gibbs was and Abby still hadn't moved, she looked between Ziva and the now spilt 'Caf Pow!' that laid in a pool on the floor where Gibbs dropped it. Ziva finally rolled over so her face wasn't pressed against the floor, and to everyone's surprise she wasn't crying, or looking ill, or anything… she was laughing.

"Ziva?" Tony couldn't believe she was actually laughing and was wondering if it was a joke. She started to sit up but Gibbs cautioned her and made her take it easy.

"I am fine, I am fine" she said through fits of laughter. She looked up to see everyone's confused faces as they were trying to figure out what was happening. "Do you not hate when that happens?"

"Uhh… Is it meant to happen? What are you talking about?" Tony was the most confused out of the lot and was looking a little agitated at not knowing what was happening.

"I just stood up to fast that is all. I woke up and got up straight away." Looking at Gibbs face she knew she had a lot of reassuring to do. "I am fine! Seriously." Gibbs nodded at Tony who was eying him off, and he went over to the phone. "Don't you dare! You will never live to see tomorrow if you do!" He looked over to her as she said this, torn whether to risk his life or ring the ambulance. He decided to stay safe and hung up the receiver.

"You are at least going to see ducky." Gibbs held both of her shoulders and looked into her eyes.

"I do not need to, I am fine. It happens a lot lately and if I went every single time this happened the…" She looked at the ground and made hand gestures as she was on a roll explaining, but she was soon cut off by Gibbs pulling her to her feet and clicking and pointing at Tony indicating to take her to out. "Gibbs this is not necessary" she said as she was led out the door. He smiled as he saw her leave still protesting. Looking up he saw Abby just standing there looking at the red pool on the ground.

"Don't worry Abbs; I will get you a new one." Abby frowned and crossed her arms. "And I will clean it up as well." A cheeky grin crossed her face and he lent down, kissed her on the temple and left the room.

* * *

The awkwardness in the elevator was almost unbearable. Ziva looked down at her hands as she fidgeted and Tony looked up at the roof, making clicking sounds with his tongue. She was on the verge of hitting him, hard, as he made the stupid noise.

"Is that necessary!" she looked up at him, as his innocent, 'whudda I do?' face looked back at her. Rolling her eyes she looked away, she was not in a very good mood now that she was being made to see Ducky and Tony was really getting on her nerves. Not just the annoying sound he continued to make but the fact the two of them couldn't just talk, instead, they were standing in an elevator in complete silence. She couldn't take this anymore; it was killing her to think that when she finally has the opportunity to sort everything out between them, with Gibbs approval, they won't even talk. She had to say something otherwise he never will. Leaning across him she flicked the emergency cut off switch and the elevator came to a stop.

"Tony, I know what I did. And I am sorry, but… do you hate me?" He did not look down from the roof the whole time she was talking and even when she had finished, he did not trust himself to look at her. He wanted to tell her the truth, that after everything that had happened, he still loved her, he had always loved her, that he was just angry that she did not love him back. But he couldn't get the words out, he did not want to make matters worse. So he just stood there in silence; little did he know that he had just made things a lot worse, by not answering she thought she had her answer. Leaning over again she flicked the switch and slightly turned away from him towards the corner. A tear rolled down her face and she wiped it away viciously. _Not here, not now. _The familiar 'ding' signalled that they had arrived at the floor and the doors opened. Walking into autopsy she held back her tears, and she could hear him walk only a few steps behind. The doors slid opened as she walked into autopsy, Ducky looked up from his desk and his eyes fell on Ziva.

"My dear, what is the matter?" He took the hint from her and ushered Tony out, he locked the doors and the only ones in the room were him and Ziva. After Tony had finished pounding on the doors to let him back in and walked away, tears rolled down Ziva's face. She hugged the doctor, her Grandfather, and let it all out.

* * *

Tony pushed the button in the elevator to go up. He stood there alone and realised how much of an idiot he had been. He hadn't even realised that she was crying until Ducky asked what was wrong.

_Tony DiNozzo, you are an IDIOT! I can't believe you didn't say anything to her, now she thinks you hate her! Stupid, Stupid! She tried talking to me, and I blocked her out just because I was a coward and was too scared to tell the truth. When I finally realised what I had done, Ducky had me out the doors and I couldn't even tell her that it's not what she thinks! Now everyone will think I am the biggest Jackass and Ziva won't talk to me again let alone look at me! You have done it this time!_

Flicking the emergency shutdown switch Tony yelled loudly, letting it all out. After restraining himself not to punch the wall and break his fist he calmed down and flicked the switch again. Walking out of the elevators towards the bull pen, the number of faces staring at him told that they had heard his little fit in the lift. Tony powered to his desk grabbed his stuff and left the room just as quickly as he had walked in. He didn't listen to the questions being fired at him by McGee, and he didn't even stop to insult him. He just had to get out and go grab a drink to numb his mind and make everything go away as much as it can. _Alcohol, here I come!_

_

* * *

_

Ducky held Ziva as she cried in his arms. This is the first time he had seen her like this, and the first time she had let him help. He was glad that she did. After she finally calmed down a bit he looked up at her and whipped the tears that ran down her golden brown cheeks.

"This is not like yourself my dear, and I am guessing by the way you were with Tony, that it is about him." She looked as him for a long time before slowly nodding as she continued to whip under her eyes with the back of her hand. "What happened?"

"Ever since I have been in hospital, it has been… different between Tony and I. When in hospital he started to act more than just a partner; and I guess, you could say I rejected him." It took her a while to get it out and when she did she was scared of the reply she might get.

"Why did you do that?" She was expecting some advice, or explanation or even psychology, but instead she got asked that. She was not quite sure how to answer because she couldn't even fully explain it to herself.

"Well, it is not that I do not like him in that way. He is funny, and kind, and loving." Ziva smiled at the thought. "I just, it is how I am. I am no good at this kind of stuff Ducky, I did not mean to hurt him and I did. He… hates me." The surprise that crossed his face was misleading and she did not understand what she had said.

"Oh my dear, Tony could NEVER hate you! Infact if anything he feels the same way you do." She shook her head at this, not allowing herself to believe it, why should she after what just happened. He could see her doubtfulness and was curious as to why she would think such a thing. "What on earth made you think that?"

"He would never love me!" she cried, "I am weak and broken; I am too fragile now emotionally. Why would anyone want ME!"

"Is this really why Ziva? My dear everyone goes through a rough patch; you got brought up by Eli to be a killer and not have emotions. To cry and show emotion is perfectly normal, infact it is good for you to get this out."

"But I asked him in the lift on the way down if he hated me. He has been ignoring me all day! Infact longer, ever since I flinched away at the hospital he has not visited me hardly except with Abby, and she probably made him come. When I asked him on the way down if he hated me he would not even look at me, he did not even respond!" She had become very angry and emotional and again cried into his shoulder as he patted her on the back.

"I don't think Tony is capable of hating someone like that, especially you. Look how close you two are. You do everything together." She looked down as she thought about this, he had a point but still she was not convinced. He didn't see how Tony reacted in the elevator, the way he just ignored her. "Also, you did not see the way he reacted when you were in hospital Ziva. It was like he was a zombie, he walked around and did work, but HE was not truly inside. His thoughts were always elsewhere and was terribly worried."

"Really?" She looked as if she was still doubtful but accepted Ducky point of view.

"May I ask you one thing but?" He said judging her emotional state.

"Yes, you can ask me anything."

"Tony said something to me about a letter you wrote, he was quite upset and said what you wrote was not what you meant or something?" She had completely forgotten she wrote that letter and what she had written in it. _This is probably why he was so upset, what have I written!_

_

* * *

_

After having a talk with Ducky, she felt better in a way. She decided it was about time to confront Tony, and talk about the letter. It was a big misunderstanding that kept building up, until they ended up like this. So much miscommunication had occurred and it needed to be fixed.

The elevator doors opened onto the floor where she worked, she started to walk towards the bullpen when she looked up to see Vance running down the stairs. She stopped and wondered what this could be about, what had happened? He ran up and stopped in front of her, he looked concerned and she knew something bad had happened.

"Ziva we need you in MTAC. Something has happened…"

* * *

Many hours and beers later Tony sat at the bar watching the latest match on the small TV behind the bartender. In the couple of hours he had been there he had made a lot of drinking buddies and the drinking competitions kept going. He was drunk… very drunk and he knew that he was going to pay in the morning. As the karaoke machine came on, it was Tony's time to shine and a group of other guys just as drunk joined him on stage for a long line of ballads. He had forgotten about everything and was letting loose for the first time in months, he was not complaining. Although he was worried about what he will realise when he woke up the next morning; he had to face his problems again and they are pretty hard to avoid when the person involved is your work partner; but for now he would forget.

One of the guys he had been drinking with that night came up to Tony and started to talk to him.

"So… you don't seem to be the drinking type, what happened?"

"I am so the drinking type, I drink all the time… especially lately." Tony became almost defensive to the guy and they both laughed, mostly because they were too drunk to do anything else.

"Girlfriend trouble?" he looked at the guy he had only known for two hours and in the spirit of being drunk, told him the whole story.

"Man, that's too bad… here another one on me!" The two men banged the glasses together in a toast and guzzled it down. As he took the last mouthful of that drink he started to feel strange and lightheaded, but not as if he was drunk; but as if he was poisoned. He felt it down his throat and in his stomach. He felt his head spinning and his heart speed up erratically. He remembered being taken somewhere by two men before he passed out. He was then moving, in a vehicle the engine roaring in his ears as he laid bound and on the cold metal floor in the back of some sort of van. He then blacked out for good.

**A.N: Wow this took me forever! I hope y'all like it :) I am super tired now I am finished because it has been early mornings, late nights and I am stuffed! So I am sorry if there are an grammar mistakes, i read over it but I am super tired so I probs missed something :p**

Thankyou to all those who reviewed! You guys are amazing! I would absolutly LOVE reviews on this chapter in particular because it took me like.. 4 hours to write hahaha maybe more... SO PLEASE! pretty please! I will love you forever if you do :)

Love you all! Keely :O)

**p.s. Alli... our plan will now go into action! :)**


	13. Chapter 13

**A.N: Would like to start by thanking 'ForeignMusicLyrics' (Alli) for helping me comeup with the ideas for the next few chapters I will be writing starting with this one :D This took me a while because I had to explain how things were going down haha. I would really love to thank all the people who have reviewed this story after the last chapter I got some great reviews which really motivated me to write this chapter right away haha so thankyou they mean so much! **

"Ziva we need you in MTAC. Something has happened…" Vance turned and walked swiftly towards the staircase with Ziva closely on his 6. Running up the staircase she started to notice the urgency and was very worried. After everything that has happened already what could possibly go wrong now. Vance leaned in has his iris got scanned and the metal door to MTAC unlocked, then they both walked in locking the door again behind them. Walking into MTAC she realised that the screen was lit but still black and that it was completely silent. The only light came from the little orange lights on eat stair and the dim ones around the walls near the exits. It reminded her of a cinema although she had only been once with Tony. She walked to the centre of the room in front of the stairs where she was met by Gibbs. He wrapped an arm around her waist as if she was going to need support and this made her fear the worse… it was not normal; something bad had defiantly happened. Vance nodded to the lady sitting at one of the computers.

"Play the tape" he said while he chewed a toothpick, another sign that something was wrong; Vance seemed to be under stress and this was not good. She breathed deeply as the fuzzy video started to play on the large screen that stood before her. She could see a man tied to a chair with a hessian bag over his head, the room looked small and dusty. The walls were concrete and it was dark inside with a yellow light spreading through the room. There were wooden crates stacked in the background and what seemed to be curtains hanging over a window behind the man, she could not see out. Looking at the bag on his head brought back images of Somalia when she too was in the same position. A man she did not recognised stood next to the man with a machine gun strapped to him. He was in plain brown trousers and a shirt and had black hair and a beard. He looked like he came from somewhere in the Middle East but she couldn't be sure from the bad footage. Vance instructed to 'pause' the video and looked at her.

"Do you recognise that man?" he pointed to the guy holding the gun.

"No I do not, what is this about?"

Vance nodded at the tech lady again and she pressed play on the video. A man said something in the background that she could barely hear, she realised another man was also in the room and she felt as if she had heard the voice before but could not pin it. The man with the gun step towards the man sitting in the chair and started to undo the rope that held the bag over his head. She felt Gibbs hold her a little tighter and then the bag was off and her heart sunk.

"Tony?" she gasped in utter disbelief. She was in complete shock and could barely speak, Gibbs watched her cautiously as he expected a worse reaction, but she did not say a word just stared at the big screen in front of her, at Tony. The video continued to play as she figured out where she had heard the voice before, it all made sense now. She felt the anger build up inside, if Tony had just left her to die this would not of happened. Why couldn't they just let her face her fate and just die? Vance made the women pause the video again as he saw the reaction she had made.

"What is it, have you recognised something?"

"The voice… the voice in the background. I know who it is. He was the one who almost killed me. I had the chance to kill him in Iraq, 7 years ago, but I failed. This is my entire fault." She looked down as she said this, not trusting herself. She felt Gibbs squeeze her tighter and she looked up at him, anger still surging through her.

"This is not your fault Ziva, not everything is your fault." She looked back up at the screen, not taking in what she heard, she was too angry at herself for putting Tony in this position.

"Play it" she said to the women who looked up at Vance to get the final ok before she once again pressed play and the video continued. A man walked out from behind the camera and she saw the familiar scar stretch down the side of his face. He walked around Tony before looking up at the camera, pleasure in his eyes and a wicked smile crossed his lips as they twisted upwards.

"Ziva David, look what you have done to your poor friend. If only you had just died on the roof that night, infact it would have been a lot easier for everyone if you had died the first time in Iraq." He let out an evil laugh that brought back memories of the night she almost died.

"Ziva don't listen to him!" Tony shouted out with a hoarse voice. The man turned around and punched him in the face.

"Shut up! No one said you could talk" Tony laughed as he usual does under pressure.

"You really have something against me don't you? Hey this reminds me of that film where that guy…" Tony was cut off when the butt of the rifle smacked him in the head, knocking him out.

"Tony!" Ziva yelled as a few tears escaped down her face. She knew that he could not hear here but yelling was her first reaction. Gibbs pulled her closer and squeezed her hand for comfort but she hardly noticed; she was too busy watching the video, trying to search for signs that Tony was OK.

"Miss David… this is what is going to happen. You will hand yourself over to me and I may spare Agent DiNozzo's life, otherwise he will die." The man turned off the camera and the room fell into darkness.

Ziva stood there barely breathing, she knew what she had to do, but it wasn't going to be easy.

"Don't even think about it Agent David, you are not risking your life again. We will sort something out" Vance said in his monotone voice that she couldn't tell if he was trying to be comforting or not. All she knew was that it made her angrier.

"We have no choice! Tony will die! I do not care about my safety!" she had now walked up to the director and was yelling at him, she had boiled over. She could not take anymore, she could save Tony but they were not letting her. She turned away and stormed out of MTAC slamming the door behind her. Tears rolled down her cheeks in anger and her face had become hot and red. She heard the door to MTAC open and close again as she flew down the stairs, she walked faster wanting to get away. She made it to the bottom when someone grabbed her arm and she flew around slamming them against the wall. She was shocked to see Gibbs and she was even more shocked about how she had just reacted. Letting go of Gibbs she tried to make her escape only to be caught again by a firm grip around her wrist; this time she did not react how she did before but slowly turned around to look at him.

"I am not letting you out of my sight, Ziva." This only made her angrier, she was being contained and she hated it.

"You are now holding me against my will! You would do that?" she was again yelling very loudly that almost everyone on her floor could hear.

"I will if it is what's best for you. I know what you are thinking of doing and I am not going to let that happen; not again."

"So what I am going to have to live here now!"

"No, you will continue to stay at my house."

"That's fine, but how are we going to save Tony! He wants ME, it will not work to take a whole heap of men in and ambush he will be expecting that!"

"I will think of something, but you don't have to worry about it you are not going to be involved."

"You are holding me hostage and now you are not letting me go and rescue my own partner!"

"Remember Ziva, I am doing this for your own good." He leant over and kissed her forehead before walking back to his desk. She was left standing there, gobsmacked. She couldn't believe what just happened in such a small space of time. _Tony held hostage, I am not allowed out of Gibbs sight and now I can't even rescue my partner!_

_

* * *

_

Ziva sat at her desk… waiting. She was in a very bad mood as Abby had found out earlier trying to ask her about Tony. She thought about what Ducky had said to her yesterday, that Tony did not hate her. It was very hard to believe especially after what happened in the lift, how he completely ignored her. But when she thought about the video of Tony yesterday, he told Ziva not to listen to him. _That meant he had to care… right?_

It had been hours since Gibbs went up to make a plan with the director and she had been sitting in the bullpen the whole time with not a thing to do. They didn't even know where Tony was being held hostage or anything; it was going to be impossible.

McGee sat at his desk watching Ziva, she was defiantly not herself and he missed the intimidating big sister. He was not quite sure of everything that had happened over the last month but he could see how badly it had affected her and he wondered if she would ever be the same. Ziva's cell phone rang and she walked over to the window to answer it.

"Hello?"

"Hello Miss David, do we have a deal?"

"What have you done with Tony!" she whispered loudly into the receiver, she couldn't let anyone else know that he had called her if her plan was to work.

"Agent DiNozzo is fine. He is just… sleeping."

"Where do you want this to happen, I need your assurance that he will live"

"Don't worry, a deal is a deal Miss David, and I do not back out of a deal. Meet me at the construction site for the new office buildings just outside town. Do you know the ones?"

"Yes I do, what time?"

"We shall meet at midnight, do not be late… there are no second chances." With this the phone cut out and she was listening to a dial tone. Now that was sorted, she just needed to find a way to get out tonight without Gibbs noticing. Walking back to her desk McGee looked up at her.

"Who was that?"

"Just Gibbs saying to go take a break. I am going to grab a coffee, would you like one?"

"Sure, that would be great."

"OK, be back soon"

* * *

Dinner was quiet as they ate, neither of them speaking. Ziva sat across from Gibbs who continued to look up at her wondering what to say. Since the other day nothing had been said between them except for a few words here and there. She was not in the mood for talking anyway, she was too nervous for her own little operation tonight and she just hoped that Tony would survive.

"Ziva, I know that you are angry; but this is for your own good. I am not losing another daughter." He put his hand on top of hers waiting for her to look up, but she didn't. What he had just said made it even harder for her to do what she was planning on doing and she couldn't bear to look at his face. She loved him like a father, he was her father and it broke her heart to think that, yes, he was about to lose another daughter. He stood up and cleared the table before going down into the basement to work on his boat and drink more bourbon.

She decided it was time to go to bed about 2130 and she started to walk off to the main bedroom, but she thought of something she needed to do. Walking down into the basement she walked over to Gibbs and gave him a hug. He was surprised at this and it took him a while before he started to hug back. She then looked up at him and started to walk away before she turned around.

"I love you… dad." This was a complete shock to the both of them, he smiled at her and she wondered what just came over her to make her say that. I guess that's what happens when you know you are signing your own death certificate in less than 3 hours.

"Love you too, Ziva."

**A.N: Ok so the end was a little out of character for the two but I think it needed it :) I love to write about their father daughter realtionship so I hope you all like it :) Please review! I am soo sorry I feel like I keep nagging at the end of every chapter but they really motivate and help me! **

**Thanks for reading so far, Keely :0) xx**


	14. Chapter 14

_**23:28**_

Ziva was staring at the clock as the minutes ticked by. Lying on the bed pretending she was asleep for the last 2 hours had been torture. When she no longer heard Gibbs shuffling in the living room and when all the lights had been turned off, she waited another 10 minutes before slipping off the bed and walking into the bathroom. She looked at herself one last time in the mirror, she saw the scars that ran down her face from the last time she had encountered the man who would kill her tonight. She turned the tap on and splashed water on her face in an attempt to calm herself, but it didn't help one bit. _Let's get this over and done with. _

She grabbed her coat and keys as she slowly turned the handle of the bedroom door. It creaked as she slowly pushed it open and she winced at the thought it might wake Gibbs who was just outside on the sofa. After hearing him snore again she proceeded to move quietly and quickly through the living room to the front door which was always unlocked. Thanks to her training she was quite as a mouse as she turned the handle and crept outside before running across the front yard and down the street. It was a quick walk to the NCIS headquarters where her car was parked, luckily Gibbs lived close. Opening the car and sliding in she shut the door behind her and rested her head and arms on the steering wheel in front of her. She looked up at the time, _**23:47**_, it was time to go.

"You can do this" she said out loud to herself before turning the key and driving out of the navy base. As she drove the short drive to the chosen location she turned the stereo up loud, trying to block out her thoughts, but it was no use. It was freezing cold yet she was sweating, the nerves were getting to her; mainly for Tony's life, not her own. She pulled up at the abandoned construction site and killed the engine. She looked at the clock again.

_**23:59**_, _this is it._

She got out of her red Mini cooper and started to walk towards the concrete frame that was too be a building. The ground crunched underneath her boots as she walked through piles of dirt and gravel to get to the building. She could see light coming from behind the structure and she knew that was where she was wanted. She walked around the last corner and went inside the half complete building where she saw the small concrete room where the video had been shot. There were two men there, the same two that were in the video, plus one more… Tony.

"Thanks for joining us Miss David; we have been waiting and so very excited." The sly voice came from across the room snapping her out of her mental state. She looked up at him and the anger built up inside.

"I am here now, let Tony go." She said this coldly as her hands balled into fists exposing her white knuckles.

"Now where is the fun in that? I think you should come over and join us." Tony had not looked up but he shook his head. She did the same, not moving any closer to the group.

"So you want to play this the hard way then?" Walking over he grabbed Ziva by the hair and dragged her to a vacant seat across from the one Tony sat in. She moaned as he threw her on the chair and held a knife to her throat as the other man tied her wrists behind her.

"I will let you two say some last words before we play out little game." The man with the scar nodded to the other and they both left the room. Tony had still not looked up and Ziva stared at him not knowing what to say.

"Well… isn't this just a little déjà-vu?" He finally lifted his head to look at her. She saw the purple and black bruise the size of a baseball on the side of his head and the dried blood that ran down his face. "Oh yeah… doesn't it look great? I actually haven't had the chance yet to look at it but apparently it came up pretty good after my good friend slammed me in the head with his gun." The sarcasm was getting on her nerves but she was happy to see him alive; she knew that sarcasm was his way with dealing with things so she waited until he got it all out before speaking.

"Are you ok, Tony?"

"Yep, we have had this conversation before… now when was that? Oh yeah! In Somalia… when again we were in this situation; seems to be the story of my life. Man I must say you have a lot of people who don't like you very much Ziva."

"OK, that is enough Tony!" He saw the tear stream down her cheek and he knew he had gone too far. She now looked away from him as she tried to regather her thoughts.

"You shouldn't have come, Ziva."

"And what I was just meant to leave you here to die!" she looked up at him, eyes glistening from the tears she held back. "This was the only way! This was my fault! Now let me fix this!"

"And what about the people you leave behind Ziva! Did you think about them? What about Gibbs, Abby, McGee, Ducky, hell even Palmer! Ziva… what about me."

"What about you? I am sure it will not affect you that much Tony… You made that pretty clear to me the other day." He looked at her for a long time and he knew how much he had hurt her, she now would not even look at him. He still could not believe that this is the second time she had tried to give her life up for him and instead of saying just saying 'thanks' he had just gotten angry at her. _Idiot_

"Ziva, I could never hate you." He saw her flinch at this but she did not look up at him. "Ziva, look at me." Still on the verge of tears she reluctantly looked up at him, her eyes empty and not the normal enticing chocolate browns he loved. "I do not hate you. What happened in the lift, that was me being a gutless jackass." She did not say anything for quite a while and he watched her as she sorted through what he had said. She closed her eyes as she sat there and he didn't know whether now she was the one doing the ignoring or if she was just thinking of what to say. She swallowed and slowly opened her eyes before she took a deep breath and finally spoke.

"Gutless? Tony you were talking to me. What were you so afraid of saying?" He looked deep into her eyes as she looked into his. He thought about what to say and could only think of one thing. A smile crossed his lips as hers twitched in confusion.

"Ziva, I love you"

**A.N: Wow this was the hardest chapter to write and took me forever even thou it was so short! (Sorry bout that btw :P) So... I think it may have been a little OOC so reviews would be lovely because I am really not sure about it :/ 9I really hope it was ok... *nervous*)And I would really like to know so I know how to tackle the next chapter which I have already slightly started (about 300 words) :D**

**Thankyou for all the lovely reviews and again to Alli for all her help :)**

**Keely, :o) xx**


	15. Chapter 15

"Ziva, I love you"

She could not believe she just heard the words that escaped his lips; she could not believe that after thinking he hated her that it was completely the opposite. Her face stayed emotionless from shock, and she could see that Tony was getting the wrong idea and his smile quickly faded. She was put on the spot and she had not been expecting it. Heat rushed through her as her heart skipped a beat. She felt the colour run into her cheeks as they turned from golden brown to a shade of red, and a tear escaped to run down her burning face. The whole time her eyes held his and she did not look away. She was about to die and the man she loved just said the three words she never expected to ever hear from him. She felt pain at the thought of leaving him and wasn't quite sure what her final words to him should be. Should she say that she loved him back?

"Tony…" Her breath caught in her throat and she couldn't get the words out. His face was now disappointment and she knew how her reaction was coming across. She wanted to set things right and tell him the truth but she could barely breath. The words would not come out and she didn't know what to do. She realised she had never been in this situation before, because she has never felt this way about anyone apart from Tony. "Tony, I…"

"Times up Kittens, time to get started." She had been cut off, she had run out of time and she would never get the chance to tell him. The men were now back in the room with them and she couldn't just tell him in front of them. _He will never know…_

She still looked into Tony's eyes as if the men had never walked back in and tears streamed down her face as she shook her head. Tony could not hold her gaze and looked down, her heart broke as she knew he thought she didn't feel the same as she longed for him to look up at her so she could show him he was wrong, but he wouldn't.

"Hey, I'm talking to you!" She felt the man grab her hair again and yank down, his gun under her chin. She had not been listening since they walked back in and the sudden force startled her. She finally realised, she was not ready to go. Not like this, but she wouldn't give in to herself, this was for Tony.

"Let Tony go and we can talk." She said ice cold, her eyes forceful as she looked back into her attackers eyes, she saw the ugly scar down his face and she smiled. "I did a good job in Iraq, except if I could go back I would have aimed a little lower." The man pulled hard down on her hair and a shooting pain went through her neck as she arched back. "Let him go!" she spat at him, and he let go of her and walked around to where Tony was sitting not lifting his gaze from her face.

"No, I was going to let him go, but because you decided to play this the hard way… Why not make it more fun and let him watch you die?" The man standing across the room laughed at this and Tony's head shot up to look at Ziva.

"No!" Tony sat up straight and struggled in his chair. "Kill me! Not her…"

"Tony, this is my fault! What did I say? Just let me fix this!" She was now angry, how dare Tony, what she wanted to sit there and watch him die? She thought that would be worse than dying herself.

"Oh, this is more interesting than I thought it would be. I know why don't you both watch each other die?"

"NO! Just kill me! I am the one you want! He just got caught up in this…"

"What? You think I would actually just let him go… he knows who I am, he knows too much. You could have saved him, but you had to go talk to him, know I must kill him." An evil chuckle came from deep within him and it sickened her. She said she wouldn't cry, but she hadn't been expecting this. "You use to be strong Ziva, you use to be almost invincible; but you have become weak since going to NCIS. No wonder your dad left you to die in the desert, you're useless, you're broken, you're worthless, and you're weak. No one will want you now, you made the right decision coming to me. Now you don't have to live your life like the person you have become. You're inferior now, nothing." She felt her blood boil at the same time as her self confidence fall apart. Tony looked at her and shook his head. She remembered the family back at NCIS that loved her, the man sitting across from her who loved her and she pieced together her confidence again, her dignity. He was now standing in front of her, face only inches from hers and she once again could smell the tobacco and alcohol on his breath which made her sick inside.

"You are right." She said to him and his lips twitched upwards in a smile. "But at least I am not a malicious, vile asshole like you." Her toes pointed to the roof as her leg extended upwards between his legs. A loud yell of agony echoed from the walls of the small concrete room as he fell to the ground holding the point of injury. She laughed as he squirmed on the ground, his face screwed up in pain. "Oh and I forgot to add stupid, your friend did not tie me up very well. Legs work just fine." He looked up from the ground at her and she knew how angry she had just made him. _Maybe not such a good idea…_

"Bitch!" He stood up and slapped her across the face hard. She moaned as she spat blood out on the ground. He was again smiling at the sight and she death-stared him back. Her leg shot upwards again but he caught it and twisted it inwards. She arched back as she tried to move with it but when she finally felt her knee pop out she screamed in agony. Tears stung her eyes and the taste of blood remained in her mouth from the cuts along her mouth and gums. Pain shot up her leg and through her dislocated knee.

He could didn't want to watch but his eyes could not leave her. He felt pain as he saw her in agony. The sound of her scream alone sent goose-bumps along his spine and his heart racing. He wished he could somehow save her, but there was no way. She continued to squirm as she tried to get away, her face screwed up and wet from the tears. It was hard to watch but he couldn't draw his eyes away, this was the last time he would see her alive and she was in agony physically and mentally. He never got the chance to kiss her, to be more than just partners. He never got the chance to live a life with her. He knew she did not feel the same way as him but he never got to see what would happen in the future. His heart was broken, his head was throbbing and he had lost hope. They were both going to die tonight in the worse way possible. The last thing said between them was not pleasant; they were always so close but had been ripped apart by the men standing in this room. Anger was an understatement of how Tony felt, he felt a lot of different things, all of them bad. He knew he was going to die. He knew she was going to die. And they were going to have to watch it all, this was not like a movie anymore, this was a dark, dark place he had never imagined of being. It was hell on earth.

"Are you ready to die Miss David? Don't worry… I am doing not just you a favour, but everyone at NCIS also." He stood between Tony and Ziva with his gun pointed at her. "Don't worry, I won't hit anything too important… I want it to be slow." He aimed and smiled as his finger felt the trigger. Tony looked deep into Ziva's eyes as she looked back into his. Then three shots were fired.

The two men hit the ground with two perfect shots to the head, he watched as the blood pooled totally in shock. _What just happened?_ He swore he heard three shots but both men only had one shot each to the head, he looked up to Ziva's face which had turned pale, she looked at him as if she had seen a ghost and it wasn't long before he realised why. Looking down at her white tank top he saw the growing red patch to her side. She slowly looked down at it before looking up at Tony, her breathing had become erratic as she gasped for air.

"Ziva, no, no, no. Please, Ziva?" He pleaded with her to stay with him and she looked into his eyes before her body took over and they rolled into the back of her head.

"Ziva!"

**A.N: Dah dah dumm :P So this is the next chapter and I hope it came out ok... I have read over it so many times that my brain is scrambled so, yer. Hope I didnt make too many mistakes ;p Thanks again to those who reviewed, love you all! They really do help, especially those who ask questions, e.g. '_Zoyarose_' haha I actually used your review to help me write this chapter haha trying to answer all the questions and make sure I covered everything and how I wanted it to play out. (Although the questions carry over to the next chapter)**

**I am not sure when I will be able to get up my next chapter I have alot on in the next 2 days so yer, we shalll c :D **

**Please review again because it is totally awesome and gets me very excited hahaha**

**Thanks again, Keely :o)**


	16. Chapter 16

The door closed with a quiet click and she was gone. Gibbs opened his eyes and sat up grabbing for his phone and hitting the speed dial.

"Hello?"

"McGee, she has just left make sure you track her phone, I'll come pick you up in about 10 minutes. Whatever you do, don't lose her!"

"Yes boss." Gibbs shut the phone as he launched up and strode across the room to the bookshelf where he grabbed his gun, badge and keys before leaving the house. Putting the car into gear he reversed out into the street, with the sound of rubber screeching across the road as he took off with no time wasted. His normal 'insanely fast driving' was nothing to this, swerving in and out of cars he made it to McGee's apartment almost 10 minutes quicker than usual. The car door was open before the car had come to a complete stop and he was already dialling McGee's number for the second time that night.

"Hello, Boss. I am coming right now I am almost there."

"Hurry up, every second counts towards Tony and Ziva's lives so MOVE!" It wasn't long before Gibbs could see him come out of the building and with a whistle he spotted the car and ran over, laptop in hand. Gibbs was in the car already and took off before McGee even had a chance to shut the door and do his seatbelt up. He slammed forward with the laptop smashing on the dashboard.

"No!" Gibbs looked up from the road to see the smashed laptop screen as McGee tried to keep it running. "No, no, No! Boss we lost her."

"Dammit McGee fix it!"

"Boss I can't the screen is completely smashed! We need to go back to NCIS or call Abby, but if she is at home it won't be fast enough." Gibbs groaned before smashing his palm against the wheel and turning it hard to the left, full lock. McGee held on this time as the car fishtailed and sped up the road in the opposite direction towards NCIS.

* * *

Gibbs waited in the car while McGee ran in to grab another laptop. He watched as the minutes ticked by getting more and more anxious. Finally McGee came running across the carpark with the new laptop and Gibbs gestured out the window to speed it up. He jumped back into the car and opened the laptop turning it on. Pulling up the tracking program he typed in Ziva's number and waited while it searched. A map came up with a red circle around it which continued to get smaller until it had isolated a block on the outskirts of the city.

"That's it Boss" The car was already in motion as Gibbs hit the gas and it hightailed out the Navy Yard and down the road.

"She still at that same place, looks like that's where the meet is."

"No McGee, she just decided to have a stop over." McGee looked away annoyed at the sarcasm, if there was any similarity between him and Tony it would have to be that, and it annoyed the hell out of him. Even Ziva had started to learn how to use it, it was unnecessary. What really annoyed him was that he also was starting to use it, the whole lot of them were becoming cynical with their sarcasm. He thought for a second about this as the car kept up its pace way over the speed limit, and then a thought occurred to him.

"Why would Ziva have her mobile on her? She knows we can track it right?" Gibbs looked down at his confused face before looking at the road again and taking a deep breath.

"I guess a little part of her wanted us to find her." McGee wasn't convinced but left it at that, he was too worried about her and Tony to question it.

"Boss, it is just around this corner." Gibbs pulled up to the curb slamming the breaks on surprising him as he braced himself. "Uh, why are we stopping here?"

"Because McGee, we don't want them to know we are coming." McGee mouthed an 'oh' as they both got out of the car and jogged down the footpath with their guns out. They rounded the corner to see a half finished concrete building in a construction site. "This looks like the place." The both stopped and peeked around the fence seeing the dim light from around the back of the building. They also saw a red mini cooper, Ziva's car.

"What's the plan Boss?"

"If we can somehow find a way to get upstairs, we will be above them and have a clear shot."

"We are not taking them in Boss?"

"No, I want them on a slab in autopsy; they have got both Tony and Ziva. It is too dangerous; we will only have one chance." McGee nodded and swallowed as he shook a little, he was afraid of how things will turn out, but he has to do it for Ziva and Tony. Gibbs signalled for them to start moving and they both ran across towards the building with their guns to their sides and slightly crouching. They made it to the front of the building when an agonising scream rang out through the building; _Ziva._

They crept around the side of the building and found what they were looking for. A dark doorway stood in the concrete wall, and as they walked in a concrete staircase stretched before them going up into the darkness. With guns held in front of them and flashlights on, they swiftly went up the staircase until they saw a dim light at the top and stopped on the last few stairs. Peeking around the corner Gibbs saw what he was hoping to find. Walkways stretched out in front of them both straight ahead and to the right with barriers around the sides. In the middle of the walkways was no roof, and looking down into the next floor he saw Tony.

"OK, I will walk straight ahead and around to the other side you stay here but get into a good position of the men. You are going to have to shoot one of them, and you only have one shot. Are you ready?" He placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder and he nodded back.

"Ready Boss."

"OK, let's save Tony and Ziva." And with that Gibbs ran across the walkway crouched down on his toes. McGee moved slightly around the corner until he could see both Gibbs and the two men on the ground. He saw a man with Ziva, he stood up and walked backwards until he was between her and Tony, he then got out a gun. He frantically looked up at Gibbs who signalled that he would take him out and to take the other one. They both nodded as they aimed for their targets, almost at exactly the same time they shot the men and their bodies fell to the ground; but only one problem remained, there were three shots fired.

* * *

"Ziva, no, no, no. Please, Ziva?" He pleaded with her to stay with him and she looked into his eyes before her body took over and they rolled into the back of her head.

"Ziva!"

The red stain continued to grow as her head fell forward. Tony shuffled his chair closer to her as tears ran down his face. He looked around to see where the shots came from but couldn't see anyone. He struggled as he continued to shuffle the chair closer and he didn't care that it pulled the rope that burned around his bleeding wrists. He had gotten half way when he stopped at the sound of footsteps coming from outside. He looked over to the door expecting the worse but was astonished to see Gibbs and McGee standing in the doorway. The two of them stared at his face as the tears continued to run down his cheeks.

"It's Ziva, she got shot." Gibbs ran over to her immediately holding her head up and inspecting the wound. He realised it was almost exactly the same spot as she was hit last time making the wound worse. McGee stood there looking at the blood pooling on the ground, completely shocked at what was happening again.

"McGee, call an ambulance! What are you doing?"

"Ahh, yes Boss" He walked outside to call an ambulance while Gibbs untied Tony. He was almost catatonic, just staring at Ziva. He could not lift his eyes from her bloodstained shirt which her hair covered and stuck to her. She looked dead, but he could see her chest rise and fall ever so slightly. Gibbs was then untying her and laying her on the ground, her lifeless body just laid there in a pool of her own blood. _This is all my fault._

"Tony, snap out of it. She needs you." He looked up at his face, his eyes filled with remorse. He got on his knees next to her and held her hand as Gibbs put pressure on her side.

"This is all my fault."

"Tony, this is not your fault. This is his fault" he said nodding his head towards the dead man on the ground. "Not yours." He stared into Tony's eyes making sure the point got across and he received a slow nod in agreement although he could sense that he still felt at fault.

"Boss the ambulance should be here very soon. Is she…"

"She's still alive McGee." Gibbs gave a comforting smile and he could tell that it was a lot for his youngest agent. "We are ok in here if you want some air, call Ducky and the director. Just wait before calling Abby, I will talk to her; try and keep this quiet for now." McGee nodded and walked out the door again leaving just Gibbs, Tony, Ziva and two dead men.

* * *

"No! I am going with her!" Tony was trying to get into the ambulance with Ziva but was being held back by a paramedic.

"We need you over here sir, you need medical attention."

"No, I need to be in with Ziva." Gibbs had been watching this and told the paramedic he better not stand in his way. The paramedic looked frustrated but let go of Tony and walked away. He got into the ambulance next to Ziva and held her hand tightly in his kissing the top of it lightly. A different paramedic hopped in the back with the two of them and the ambulance rolled away towards the hospital. He did not take his eyes of her face as he watched her breath up and down slowly.

"How bad is it?" He did not look up and the paramedic looked at her before he answered.

"It's hard to say. She passed out from shock most likely so she could wake up at any time but her bleeding is the main problem. She may look fine but there could be serious damage and bleeding inside that we don't know about, and it's hard for them to tell with the drugs so we will have to operate straight away." Tony nodded and kissed her hand again, breathing in her scent. She stirred in the stretcher and he looked at her hoping that she had woken up but her eyes weren't opening.

"Ziva?" She didn't reply so he squeezed her hand. "Ziva?"

"She seems to be getting lighter so she could wake up soon" The paramedic checked her vitals as the ambulance neared Bethesda Hospital. They pulled up to the emergency section and 3 other paramedics opened the back doors of the ambulance and started to get her out. Tony got out of the ambulance with her still holding her hand and as they walked towards the sliding glass doors he felt her hand tense in his. He looked back at her to see her eyes flutter open.

"Ziva! Your awake, it's just Tony we are at the hospital. You have been shot."

"Tony?" she said in a weary voice barely audible. "I was shot?"

"Yes, but you're going to be ok… I promise." He smiled at her and she stared into his eyes managing a little smile back. This surprised Tony; after all that had happened she managed to give him a smile, he hadn't seen her smile in a long time.

"Miss David, we are going into surgery right away. We fear you may have some internal bleeding." She looked at the doctor as he spoke and then looked at Tony again with a frantic face. He squeezed her hand as he wiped the hair out of her face.

"You will be fine." He smiled at her, but this time he didn't get a smile back. She looked worried as she saw the surgery doors coming towards them.

"Sir you cannot come past this point." She felt him let go of her hand and she panicked more.

"Wait! Please Wait! Tony!" The paramedics stopped pushing the bed and she tried to twist around to see if Tony was behind her, but he was infact right by her side again.

"It's going to be ok…"

"No, no, please just listen." He looked at her face as she seemed so worried. He was confused what by if it wasn't about the surgery.

"We have to go now Ziva." Said the female doctor in a soothing tone. They started again to push the bed towards the doors and just before Tony let go of her hand again she pulled him close to her face.

"I love you too." She then let go and was wheeled through the doors, leaving Tony standing alone in the corridor.

**A.N: Hey thanks for reading, I am super tired! Like really reallly... so hopefully it at least makes sence this chapter haha. Thanks for all the reviews an I would absolutly LOVE! To recieve more!**

**Keely :o)**


	17. Chapter 17

**A.N: OK... I dont feel as if thsi chapter is as good as some of my others an I am sorry bout how short it is, it is only 9pm an I am going to bed I am soooo tired! Now there is a itte McAbby in this aswell! :) just a tad... :p I hope you likkeeee and pease review! :D It makes me soo happy! haha**

Tony was about to walk away from her when she grabbed his arm and pulled him close, he felt her breath on his neck as it was just inches from her face. It sent electricity through his veins being so close and his heart pounded against his rib cage.

"I love you too." He felt her let go and she was gone, the doors swinging on their hinges from their exit. He was now alone in the corridor and although it was very cold he couldn't tell as heat rushed through him. He had just heard her say something completely unexpected and he could never have imagined how he felt at that moment. She loved him, after everything they have gone through, after everything he has done, she loved him. He did not believe his own ears as she had said it, and he still wasn't quite sure if he had heard correct. He realised the courage it would have taken for her to just say that, she had never shown her emotions until the last month and even now it would still be something very hard for her to do. Hell, it was hard for anyone to confess their love for another and she had just done that with him. _What happens now? _

It was a surreal feeling, that she loved him, and no one could wipe the smile off his face. He walked down the corridor into the emergency waiting area to see Gibbs, McGee and Abby. Abby walked back and forwards across a small length of the waiting room taking tiny steps and looking worried.

"Abbs, sit down. She will be ok" Gibbs was trying to calm her down and McGee watched the two of them, looking exhausted. He walked towards the group trying to hide his smile but couldn't contain it… he was too happy and Gibbs noticed immediately.

"She's ok?" He questioned looking up at his goofy grin.

"Uh, she should be. She woke up when we got here and was a little confused. She has gone into surgery because they fear internal bleeding but. She should be fine hopefully." His smile faded a bit by his words, as he remembered the state she was in. Gibbs looked confused at him because of his happy state and Abby looked annoyed.

"Tony, how can you be smiling when Ziva almost died again!" She was upset at how he was acting and it reminded her of Ziva when Gibbs was in hospital. He had not realised that he should be more upset and quickly made his smile fade. McGee looked up at Gibbs face and got the message he was trying to get across.

"Come on Abbs; let's go get some fresh air." He walked over and steered her out of the waiting room with a hand on each shoulder, so that it was just Tony and Gibbs left in the room.

"So, you two finally got the guts to sort things out?" Tony was shocked at how easy it was to tell what had happened, and he again couldn't wipe the goofy grin off his face.

"You could say that." Gibbs smiled back which was his approval. "You sure it's ok Boss? What about your rules?"

"I'll let you break just this one. Besides I don't want things to be like how they were recently, as long as you keep it for your private life and not work then I am ok with it." Tony beamed at the thought of having a 'private life' with Ziva and also having Gibbs approval. "I am going to grab a coffee, would you like one?"

"Ah, sure Boss. That would be great." He nodded before heading down the corridor to the cafeteria.

"Oh and Tony…"

"Yah Boss?"

"Get your wrists and that fixed." He looked down at his raw wrists and then felt his head. He had completely forgotten about his own injuries.

"Oh, yeah sure thing." He walked over to the nurse's station and told them what was wrong. A female doctor in her young thirties then walked out and ushered him into a private room.

"Wow, what happened to you?" The doctor had long blonde hair that was left out and bright blue eyes. She wore scrubs that looked way too tight for her and she was very appealing. Normally Tony would chat up the young, attractive doctor; but not today. Infact he hardly noticed her, he only had one person on his mind.

"Oh, I was held hostage and tied up, hence the rope burns on my wrists plus I was hit across the head with some guys gun." She looked at him bewildered and gave a small nervous laugh. He smiled at the thought that she probably thinks that he is crazy, and she couldn't even speak. She looked at him up and down to see if the story fits and when it did she looked astounded.

"You're joking right? Is that what really happened?"

"Yep. I am very special Agent Anthony DiNozzo form NCIS. Comes with the job."

"Ok then." She didn't dare ask questions and she was now very nervous. She assessed his injuries and bandages his hands and wrists before giving him the all clear and sending him out relieved.

* * *

"Abby, she is going to be ok. Tony said she woke up and it seemed she was talking." Abby and McGee stood outside in the cool night air and Abby continued to pace frantically. He rolled his eyes before stepping out towards her and grabbing her arm.

"Everything will be fine Abs. Ziva would not want you to be so worked up." She looked up into his eyes before enveloping him in a hug. It wasn't long before he wrapped his arms around her and they stood there just holding each other.

"I hope your right Timmy." She whispered into his shoulder and he rubbed his hand in circles on her back in a soothing motion.

"Don't worry, I know I am right. She will be fine, what she really needs is her best friend when she wakes up to be there for her and to be calm." He felt her nod into his shoulder and she then looked up at him with a weak smile.

"Thanks for always being there for me Timmy." She stood on her tippee toes and pecked him on the cheek before grabbing his hand and pulling a very surprised McGee inside.

* * *

Tony walked back into the waiting room all bandaged up. He saw McGee and Abby asleep in each other's arms and he smiled at the thought that hopefully that will soon be him and Ziva.

"Here's your Coffee." Gibbs walked up behind him with a hot coffee in each hand. He grabbed the one closest to him and took a swig of it before gagging at its strong taste.

"Wrong one Tony." Said Gibbs before swapping the two cups and walking over to where the other two were asleep.

"Oi, Abbs, McGee wake up." He shook them both and they stirred before finally opening their eyes.

"Hello there, McGee." She said with a grin on her face. He only just realised they were in each other's arms and quickly drew away; she laughed at him although also a little disappointed that he had let go.

"You two should go home, to separate homes… Ziva could be a while I will call as soon as we hear anything." McGee scowled at the 'separate homes' joke by his boss and got up pulling Abby with him. They both walked out looking as if they had been out partying all night, stumbling around and using each other as support. Gibbs smiled as he saw them walk away, laughing at the state they were in. He was happy, everyone was now safe and they had killed the bastard who had started this, hopefully things will get back to normal for them all soon.

**A.N: OK that is all for now.. sorry there wasn't much TIVA haha its more of a filler chapter... Reviews would be lovely!**

**Keely :o)**


	18. Chapter 18

**A.N: Ok so am in the middle of nowhere with hardly any internet so yer sorry for the later than usual update :) I got asked for a bit more McAbby so here we go! Not sure how good this is but hopefully it shall be ok :S As always reviews would be AMAZING! and thankyou, thankyou THANKYOU to those who have reviewed. Anyway here we go...**

Ziva starts to notice her surroundings as she wakes up. She pretends to still be asleep as she listens, she hears steady breathing next to her and she hopes that it is someone in particular. She has woken up happy for the first time in what seems like forever. She can feel the warmth from the sunlight that drifts across the bottom of her bed and she breaths in the fresh air with what smells like roses, _Abby_. She smiles imagines the black bouquet she will see when she opens her eyes, she also hopes to see a familiar face. She hasn't spoken to Tony since she said the three hardest words to say to someone in the English language. Separately, the words don't mean much at all, but together they could make or break someone's heart, in this case it was not the latter she hoped. She had no idea what would happen between the two of them now and she had never really been in a 'relationship' before, she did hope that things wouldn't change too much between them, besides become more… intimate. She only just then after laying their pretending to be asleep realised that a hand was intertwined with hers, she savoured the moment to herself before finally opening her eyes and seeing a familiar pair of greens in front of her, staring at her.

* * *

He watched her as she slept, this time her face peaceful instead of tormented, although her face was bruised and scratched she looked beautiful and radiant, she looked happy and he could swear she was smiling. He felt her hand tighten around his before her eye lids fluttered open to show her beautiful chocolaty browns. She gave a weak, groggy smile and he gave a cheesy grin back. He just wanted to lean down and kiss her, but he really didn't know how to act. He knew she had been through a lot, and he wasn't sure if either of them were really the romantics, besides, she had said she loved him but did that mean they are a couple now? Or does that require a proposal of some sort. For now he was going to be her partner, her friend, maybe a little closer but nothing more until they had sorted things out.

Nothing was said between them for sometime but they were both content and there was no awkwardness in the silence. They were just happy to be in each other presence, and this is always a good sign.

"How are you feeling?" He finally says to her and she snapped out of her trance searching his face.

"I am fine, how long do I have to stay in here?"

"At least tonight, maybe longer. The doctor said there may be some complications from the surgery, they stopped the bleeding but you got shot in almost exactly the same place as last time so it will take a lot longer to heal." She groaned in frustration as she turned her head to the side.

"I do not need to be here, I am fine!" She rolled her eyes and threw her head back into the pillow with frustration. She felt caged in the hospital, just what she needed after everything that has happened. He laughed at her and she threw back a look that was ice cold.

"Hey! This was not my decision; take it up with the doctor." He again threw her a cheesy grin which seemed to always have a calming effect on her as she rested back and looked up at the roof. The whole time she had not let go of his hand and he dared not let go of hers, this is as close as he would allow himself to get to her for the time being, until he knew what they both wanted.

* * *

"McGee, can't you go any faster!" Abby was getting frustrated as they were on their way to the hospital. He sneaked a glance at her as she tapped on the passenger window chasing the drops of rain that ran down the glass.

"Abby, it's a traffic jam, what do you want me to do?"

"I don't know, put a siren on or something."

"I'm not a cop, it doesn't work that way." She looked away from the window and frowned at him, she stared at the side of his face as he impatiently tapped his thumbs on the steering wheel. The traffic had now come to a complete stop and they weren't even half way to the hospital.

"Do you think…" She cut her sentence short and jerked her head away, her piggie-tails flying through the air as she looked back towards the window.

"Do I think what?" He then became very curious by the way she had stopped mid-sentence.

"It doesn't matter." She looked down at her hands as she fiddled with the black, studded bracelet around her wrist.

"Come on Abs… Don't do that. Just ask me, I'm all ears." She looked up at him momentarily and he could see the sadness in her eyes, as she also could now see the concern in his. "Abs, what's the matter?" He reached out and placed a hand on the top of hers, eyes still on the traffic as they went dot mile an hour. A small smile crossed her face as she looked down at his hand and played with his fingers while drawing circles on his palm.

"It's just that, she hasn't been herself lately Timmy! What if she has changed? What if we won't be such good friends anymore; she might not even like me anymore!" Horror crossed her face at the thought and she started to figit in the passenger seat. "Maybe this isn't such a good idea, maybe we should just go home and let her recover…"

"Abby! Are you insane? You really think that she wouldn't like you anymore? Abs… She loves you, and she needs you now more than ever!" He looked down at her rubbing his thumb up and down the back of her hand. She continued to look away and he untangled his hand from hers and put it under her chin to make her look up at him. "Abs, it's going to be fine, infact I think she is going to be upset if you don't see her." A small smile crossed her face as she nodded; he smiled back at her before she again took his hand in hers as they continued to slowly edge towards the hospital.

* * *

Ziva sat upright in the bed with a tray of food in front of her, if you could even call it that. It was once mash potato and beef stew but she had managed to mix it together and let it go cold. One thing she could not yet master was the art of keeping her food down and just looking at the pile in front of her made her nauseous. Tony had gone for a coffee and the room felt empty and dull without him. She pushed the tray aside and decided to have a nap when she heard jingling coming from the door. She lent to the left trying to see through it but she couldn't see anyone. She heard mumbling outside and a familiar high pitched voice, putting two and two together she knew who it was and couldn't help but smile.

"Abby? Is that you?" She waited for a reply but received none and felt a little disappointed. Maybe she was wrong… She was about to lay back down to get some sleep when she heard the jingling again as well as the muttering of voices. All of a sudden McGee walked through the door dragging Abby behind her. Ziva frowned a little as she saw that McGee had to physically drag her in. _Was she scared of me? _

"Hello Ziva, how are you feeling?" McGee lent down and kissed her on the cheek, she smiled at her almost, little brother. He had another bouquet of flowers in all different colours and she loved the brightness.

"I'm feeling good thankyou McGee" She smiled warmly at him and then she looked at Abby. She looked quite nervous and smiled shyly, she also noticed that instead of being in a bone crushing hug she was quite distanced from her. "Hello Abby" she said smiling just as warmly, Abby smiled a little bigger but she still looked nervous. "So how are you McGee?" she had to start a conversation to break the awkward silence in the room. She had been looking forward to seeing Abby but it did not seem to be mutual and this dampened her spirit.

"Pretty good, nothing really to do. Gibbs gave us all the day off… actually more like the whole week. No cases of anything…" He nodded and trailed off. She smiled at him and again the awkward silence set in. She sneaked a peek at Abby who was now looking out the window, she had to do something.

"McGee, do you mind just giving me a moment with Abby." Another warm smile his way and he nodded backing out of the room. If she thought Abby looked nervous before, she was looking horrified now. She didn't really know what to say to her, but something was wrong.

"Abby are you alright? Have I done something?" Abby looked up and could see that she was hurt. _McGee was right all along, I'm just acting stupid._

"I'm sorry" and before Ziva could say a word she was in one of Abby's bear hugs and a smile crossed her face. This was the Abby she knew. "I am so glad you're ok, I was so worried." It seemed like forever before she let go and stood back, finally a real smile playing her lips.

"I am fine Abby, especially now that I have seen you. I have been looking forward to seeing you." Abby was now beaming and realised how silly she was.

"Hey, now that McGee is gone; it's time to have a little, long overdue, girl talk". Now Ziva was the one looking nervous and this made Abby burst out in a fit of giggles. "I know that you were never really the one for that Ziva, but… what happened between you and Tony yesterday?" A mischievous look crossed her face and she could tell she was enjoying this. Ziva on the other felt like she wanted to spill her guts about the whole thing, which is an unusual feeling for her and made her uncomfortable. She decided it was best to try and steer clear of that as long as possible, Tony and herself hadn't even talked about it. Now that is something she was almost dreading, not because she never wanted anything to happen between them like her usual reasons, but because she didn't know how to talk about it. She was out of her comfort zone.

"What makes you ask that?" She wondered how Abby even knew something happened. _Had Tony said something?_

"Well we were all in the waiting room and we were like freaking out, because we had no idea what was happening! Then here comes Tony around the corner with a love struck teenager grin on his face!" Abby was very animated and excited while telling her this and she knew that if Abby picked up on it, then so would Gibbs. Now she was freaking out. She had no idea how to reply to this and she looked away trying to hide the smile that tugged the corners of her mouth. _"Love struck teenager grin"_ she tried to imagine this and it made her feel warm and fuzzy inside.

"Ziva! Tell me!" She had completely tuned out from the world and was snapped back into reality by Abby's shriek. She saw the excited look on her face as she was now sitting cross legged on the end of her bed.

"Time to go Abs." The two girls looked up to see McGee at the door.

"But" Abby looked disappointed by the interruption and started to walk over to McGee. Before leaving she swung back around and with one finger pointing at her "We will talk about this later" she winked and they both left the room. _Saved by McGee._

**A.N: Ok so hope its not too OOC, I think it is ok, but not quite sure! I hope you love and please review so I know what I am doing right and wrong... Thankyou again!**

**Keely :0)**


	19. Chapter 19

**A.N: OK, so really 'iffy' about this chapter... Not so much the ideas but how I wrote it... I was either going to post this or completely rewrite it, but I decided to post it so I reallly hope its ok :S. So here comes more TIVA and also father/daughter stuff between Gibbs and Ziva :) Please revieww! please please it means so much and it really helps because I was completely lost with this one, right in the middle, massive writers block :/ So please tell me how I went because im freaking out! haha**

There was only one person who hadn't visited her yet and that was Gibbs. It was now early evening and she had been looking out for him all day since sending Tony home to get some sleep. He put up a fight but she won, so he left her around Mid-day so both of them could get some well deserved rest; although this was very difficult for her as she was worried about what Gibbs' visit would bring.

In the early afternoon Ducky had come and visited, sharing one of his lifetime memories which twist and turns as he gets further off topic. Although she normally would not enjoy it she was just happy not to be alone and for the first time she listened and actually became quite interested in what he was saying. Ducky had left about an hour and a half ago and there was still no sign of her father figure. Her gut wrenched at the thought of how much she must have hurt him, he had already lost a daughter before.

Her body started to take over and the lack of sleep started to push her over the edge, her eye lids dropped and she started to fall asleep. Before she had the chance to completely block out the world around her she was startled by the moving of a chair next to her bed. She lied on her side facing the window and she could hear the steady breathing from behind her. She let her eyes open as she surveyed the room then slowly rolled over to see the dark figure that sat next to her lit by the moonlight that shone through the window.

"Gibbs?" She let her eyes adjust to the new light and then she finally saw who the figure was. She jumped and sat up straight in the bed as far away as she could. She did not want to see this person, and most defiantly didn't expect it. Here sitting in the room with her was her father, her birth father, Eli David.

"Did I startle you?" He asked, his voice monotone.

"What are you doing here? You should not have come." Her voice could freeze larva as she spat at him through her teeth.

"Why should I not have come? Can I not see my own daughter?"

"Did you ever think I did not want to see you?" She still sat upright and tense as she looked at the man she hated.

"I do not think you have a say in this, you are my daughter and I will come and see you whether you like it or not. What brought this on anyway Ziva, why do you not want me to see you?" She was completely shocked at how he could even ask that question. Anger and resentment burned her insides as her blood boiled, she felt as if she was going to explode and she knew she would not be able to hold it in.

"WHY? You want to know why? How dare you even step foot inside my country and anywhere near me! You sent me on a suicide mission in Somalia, you knew that your only live daughter would be tortured to death and you didn't even care! And don't even get me started on what has just happened!"

"What just happened! I had nothing to do with this!"

"Bullshit! As soon as he knew about Tony I knew it came from you! You never liked him, infact you despise him! Well guess what, he is part of my life and you will have no say!" She tried to calm herself down but she had to get it all out, there was one thing she hadn't yet said, one thing she need to get out. She knew his intentions, he never loved her. She was just another soldier to him, another assassin doing his dirty work, and now that she was useless to him, he needed her gone; she knew too much. "You want me dead! Then here is your chance!" She was in hysterics as tears burnt her eyes, her face hot and sticky. He looked on her with pity, as if she had accused an angle of working for the devil.

"Enough! I have come to take you home to your family, where you belong." He reached out to grab her but she jumped across the room ripping her catheter out from her arm. Her heart monitors restricted her movement and she backed into the corner of the room near the machines. The heart monitor beeped crazily as she barely stayed conscious, the room spinning.

"My family is here! I am not your daughter and you are not my father! I want nothing to do with you!" He took one last look at her before exiting the room, leaving her on the ground in a ball; he knew that the room will soon be flooded with doctors and nurses so he made his escape. She could barely breathe as she sobbed, the room still spinning, she woke up happy this morning and she now could barley control herself, she was a mess and she just wanted for everything to go away; she wanted to fade into the blackness to escape.

* * *

"Back again Agent DiNozzo?" The perky blonde at the nurse's station bit her bottom lip while looking up at him.

"Sure am ladies" he said regarding the brunette nurse who also sat behind the counter. "How is she?" he smiled at the thought of her again and hoped that the bunch of orange lilies in his hand weren't too much or too little.

"She should just be sleeping, she has been fine" The blonde looked down at the computer screen and her face went from perky to ghostly. Tony immediately panicked.

"What is it?" He didn't get a response from her and she picked up the phone in a panic dialling 3 numbers.

"Hello, yes, we need assistance in room 12, I am unclear on the situation but it doesn't look good." She hung up the phone and looked up to a very worried look on Tony's face. "Agent DiNozzo, something has happened." She stood up from behind the counter and walked speedily towards Ziva's room with Tony close on her six. Walking into her room he thought it was empty but when the nurse walked around to the other side of the bed he saw her.

The flowers hit the floor as he rushed over and knelt beside her. Her hair was in a sticky mess around her wet face and blood ran down her arm from where she ripped out her IV. He wasn't sure but she seemed unconscious and her hands were clutched around her stomach as if she was trying to hold herself together. She was in a foetal position with her legs pulled up to her chest as she shivered. He reached out to pull her close but she grabbed his wrist, twisting it and forcing it into the ground before jumping up and leaning back into the corner, leaving Tony on the floor. Tony stood up and backed away towards the terrified nurse; he knew that it was the best thing to do while she was like this, just back away. She looked up between Tony and the stunned nurse and realised her mistake. It was not Eli at all; they were only trying to help.

"I am sorry" she managed to breathe out. If they didn't think she was crazy already they definitely did now; she could see the need for an explanation and as much as she didn't want to say anything she knew it was necessary. "I thought you were Eli."

"What Eli was here?" She couldn't read Tony's face and started to panic. _What does he think of me now?_ She knew this was not like her and she was frustrated to see how much she got affected by the charade. Her knees knocked together as her legs became week and she needed support. She tried to walk over towards the bed but stumbled only to be caught by a pair of strong arms. She looked up at his face, still unreadable, but she didn't care; she needed him. She leant into his chest and wrapped her arms around his waist hoping he too would hold her. He did, and he lent down and kissed the top of her head. She then pulled away, her natural guard acting out and stumbled the little distance to the bed. She could tell he was hurt by the way she pulled away but this was not the time. She sat on the edge of the bed and eventually he came over and sat next to her. Two doctors and another nurse came in and they all talked in hushed tones to the blonde, once perky, nurse in the far corner of the room. She leant against Tony, her head on his shoulder, and she reached over to take his hand in hers; they stayed that way as the doctors assessed her.

The doctors finally left after checking and double checking that everything was ok. She knew her little charade would keep her in hospital longer which made her a little more depressed. Tony let go of her hand and let her lay down in the bed as she pulled the blankets up around her. He could see that she was sad, unlike the happy Ziva he saw this morning; he wanted to cheer her up but wasn't quite sure how. He also wanted to go and bash Eli for the state he left her in, but that wouldn't be such a great idea. He walked around to the other side of the bed where the seat was and saw the bunch of flowers he bought her on the ground. He looked up at the million black roses and another 2 bright bunches near the top of her bed and felt a little disheartened about his gift. He picked up the flowers and walked over to her holding them out. She looked up and saw them, a smile finally spreading across her face and she sat upright in the bed.

"They are beautiful Tony." She took them off him and smelt them, a sweet fragrance filling her nose.

"I know there not much, you already have heaps but…"

"No, I love them; and they are a beautiful colour." She looked up at him, a warm, radiant smile across her lips.

"I thought about roses, but I remembered Abs would have gotten you a heap of her black roses. I then saw these, and they reminded me of you. They were both exotic and beautiful." She blushed at the reference and he gave himself a mental head-slap as he realised how corny he just sounded. _This is Tony DiNozzo, never committed to long term relationships and never the corny romantic; but here he is falling head over heels for his partner._

"Well, I love them. Thank you." She took another breathe of sweet fragrance as she marvelled them, before placing them next to her on the side table. She looked up to see the childish grin on his face that she loved and she stared into his eyes as he stared into hers. Their surroundings were non-existent to them both as they got caught up in the moment. The term 'eye-sex' defiantly applied and they were both so tempted to become a lot more intimate.

"Oi, earth calling DiNozzo and David!" Their heads snapped up to the door where Gibbs stood half in, half out of the room.

"What no flowers?" she said. And Tony and Ziva both laughed and then so did Gibbs to their surprise when he pulled out a bunch from around the corner, and walked over towards the bed. He handed the bright bouquet of carnations and she took them, placing them next to Tony's bunch. "Thankyou" She was now very nervous all of a sudden and she could see that they had both noticed.

"I'm going to grab a coffee, I will see you both later." He walked over squeezed her hand and exited the room leaving her alone with Gibbs. What was in store for her? She had no idea and thinking about it made her more and more terrified of what was to come.

"I thought you were never going to come."

"I had some stuff to… take care of. Nothing you need to worry about." He smiled at her and she nodded, not so sure. "How are you?" she looked away for a second trying to buy time to think of what to say. She figured he would find out everything anyway so there was nothing to hide.

"I have been better; I had a little… moment this afternoon."

"What that one just then with DiNozzo?" His attempt of humour failed in the tense moment.

"No, not quite; Eli payed me a visit." She winced at the thought of it and his face showed worry.

"What happened?" She looked away, trying to find a way to explain what happened without having another emotional breakdown.

"We fought and he wanted to take me back to Israel. I told him I wouldn't go. That my family is here, I told him he wasn't my father and he tried to grab me. I freaked out and I… passed out. I woke up to Tony and a lot of nurses and doctors. I almost broke Tony's wrist he startled me so much, I thought he was him…" She couldn't get another word out and a tear trailed down her cheek. She felt him wipe it away with his thumb and she looked up at him. "I am sorry, Gibbs. I know how much I hurt you and I am sorry. You know you are like a father to me, one I never had." She attempted a smile but failed.

"You don't know how much pain you cause me Ziva, you keep trying to throw your life away. But, you wanted to be found this time didn't you?" She nodded still not making eye contact, trying to rebuild the walls as he pulled each brick out.

"I was going to just run and I was going to try and sneak out, leaving no trace. I had allowed myself to accept the fact that I would die, but… you stopped me. Without even realising it, you stopped me."

"I knew I couldn't stop you from going Ziva, when you have your mind set there's no stopping you, good thing we followed you." He gave a small laugh at her strong will, something he loved about her, yet caused him the most pain. He lent down towards her and whispered in her ear. "But please, don't do it again" He lent down and kissed her forehead, before turning around to leave.

"Oh, and one other thing." He pulled out her knife from his pocked and wrapped her hand around it. "For you." He then gave her a smile before leaving the room.

**A.N: SO? SO? what did you guys think? I have no idea if this chapter was good or terrible so please tell me! It will really help with writing the next chapter because Im a little stuck ATM... I dont like to make 'filler' chapters that are boring so yer... haha THANKYOU!**

**Keely :o)**


	20. Chapter 20

**A.N: Tiva chapter! For all my Tiva fans out there I hope this keeps you satisfied... but this is only a taste of what is to come haha. This is my longest chapter yet because I just couldn't stop writting! Thanks again for the ovely reviews an I am hoping there will be more after this chapter it seriously toook me hours! Like twice as llong as my other chapter to try and get the right feel haha. Anywayyysss I am realllllly hoping you'all love it and that I got the right 'TIVA' haha amd that there is enough.**

**Enjoy!**

Ziva did up the last button on her three-quarter sleeved purple top which she wore with a pair of straight jeans. Looking in the mirror she traced the scar down the side of her face hoping that it would soon fade. She knew she was once beautiful, and it worked very nicely to her advantage in undercover ops; but now when she looked in the mirror, she did not feel beautiful. She saw that her face was scarred and bruised and she had no idea how she could ever be loved; but apparently she was.

Nothing had really happened between Tony and herself even tho they had said those three magic words to each other, and in a sense she was scared. She had never had feelings like this before and she didn't know how to express them; she still was quite unsure if she even could express them. She wondered if anything would actually happen at all, or if they will both bottle their feelings inside again and move on with life. She was hoping that would not happen again, she remembered the feelings she got when she saw him with another women, the feelings she got when she was with another man; it was not right. She got out the make-up she got Abby to bring over for her and dabbed the concealer down her scar and over the bruises. She never puts make up on normally, except for special occasions; but for some reason she was now more self-conscious knowing that Tony would soon arrive to pick her up. After she had done her makeup she looked in the mirror one last time sighing with disapproval. _This is as good as it is going to get._

She grabbed her stuff and went to the door of the tiny bathroom. As she opened the door she saw someone sitting on the bed and she looked down to try and hide her smile, she felt like a complete idiot, grinning so stupidly

"Are you ready to go?"

"Definitely" she said finally making eye contact to see his childish grin.

"So, how are we going to get all these flowers out! I was thinking that you could set up a little flower stand down in the lobby with all these. You would make a fortune!" She laughed as she looked up to the wall of flowers behind the hospital bed, most of them black roses from Abby. She wasn't quite sure if they were already dead or not but they still held their sweet fragrance.

"Here let me take that" he stood up and grabbed the bag that was in her hand pausing for a slight moment as his hand lay on top of hers. She looked up at him and saw a big grin on his face. "Are you going to let go?" She hadn't even realised that she still had a hold of it and then suddenly released it feeling embarrassed.

"Sorry" she mumbled looking away.

"OK then, let's go!"

It was Déjà vu as she sat in Tony's car and smirked at the million black roses on the back seat. To think it was only a short while ago when she was sitting in the car with Gibbs after the first time she was shot. She heard Tony close the trunk and he was soon sliding into the driver's seat next to her. She had been in the car many times before with Tony but for some reason she felt very nervous. She was hoping there wouldn't be an awkward silence to her apartment, but she had no idea what to say; luckily Tony spoke first and she finally let out the breath she had been holding.

"Are you sure you will be OK tonight Ziva?"

"Tony I can take care of myself." She snapped at him and from the corner of her eye she could see his shocked and pained face.

"I didn't mean it like that, your apartment is trashed, I was just…" She had hated being so vulnerable lately and now her defence was up again. She hated to think that she needed 'help'; she always has, and lately she has been receiving a lot. She felt her heart falter as she saw the look on Tony's face, and realised he was just being caring and she should not of snapped at him.

"I am sorry, I will be fine… thankyou" The rest of the way to her house was in silence, just what she DIDN'T want. She glanced up at his face now and then but couldn't read his expression. _Is he angry at me? Don't blame him._ She spent the whole journey trying to think of what to say but she was already at her apartment before she got the chance.

"Here we are." He said not making eye contact. She looked up at him and couldn't leave the car until she had fixed this.

"Tony"

"Yeah?" He mumbled looking at her from the corner of his eye.

"Thank you for your concern, you always have my back, and I thank you." She used two fingers to turn his head to look at her. She gave a small smile before leaning in and tenderly kissing him on the cheek. "I will talk to you later." A small smile played his lips as he nodded. She opened the car door and got out before feeling a hand around her arm. She looked down to see Tony looking at her, slightly worried almost.

"Call me if you need."

"I will" she gave a small smile before grabbing her bag as well as her million flowers and heading into her apartment building.

He sat outside of her apartment for 10 minutes after she had left. When she kissed him on the cheek he was so tempted to turn his head so that their lips had met, but he decided not to push it. He didn't know how she felt anymore, there was something there sure, but he didn't know if they should pursue it. She was like no other girl he had dated before, he knew that she was not the one to flirt and show her feelings, sure there was always the teasing and bantering but he felt it wasn't enough. He didn't want to try anything if she did not feel the same way, he would just have to wait. He had been sitting outside her house for a while and didn't know whether to go in and confront her about it. He knew she was in a fragile state as was seen by the way she bit his head off in the car, but he really wanted to sort things out one way or another so he knew how to act around her. He didn't know whether she wanted him to be more intimate or back off and with one tiny sentence her mood could change dramatically. He knew she was under a lot of emotional and mental stress and he wanted to talk to her about it, he wanted her to let it all out, he wanted to be there for her; but she still had hardly talked about Somalia let alone something so recent.

_She will talk when she is ready, _he thought to himself, but he also knew deep down that she should not be alone tonight. He looked up at the lit window of her apartment before turning on the ignition and pulling away from the curb.

* * *

_She could smell the sickening mixture of tobacco and 'Caf Pow!' as his breath was hot on her face. He whispered terrible things in her ears that she tried not to believe but were tearing her apart. She tried to struggle against him but he had a tight grip on her and she was too weak to struggle. She tried yelling out but no sound came from her screaming mouth, she tried to fight but her limbs would not move, she felt paralysed, trapped. She could not see the man's face but expected it to be no other than Salim, he pulled away and to her surprise it wasn't his face she saw; it was her fathers. The prison camp she was in morphed into the walls of the hospital and she was once again lying in the hospital bed. Eli was next to her and this time she could not get away. Tears streamed down her face as he got closer, she couldn't escape. He brought his face so close to hers that it was the only thing she could see. _

"_Ziva come home, to your real home. They do not love you these Americans, they are not your real family." She tried to speak but again it was like someone had hit mute, no sound escaped her lips. He smiled a wicked smile as he could see he was getting to her._

"_Ziva, you are weak. This is not you, you cannot be this person. You are damaged goods and are no use to the Americans, come back to your real family who has stuck by you. You will be strong again, powerful." She could barely breathe as tears of pure hatred and anger burnt her eyes. She built up all her strength to try and yell at him and it finally worked._

"_You have never stuck by me! My family is here! The people I love are here! Stay the hell away from me!" _

"_Oh, you do not need to worry about the people you love, I have taken care of them." She looked at him in horror as she could suddenly see past him to the body that lay on the ground, it was Tony, dead. His throat was slit and he lay in a pool of his own blood. His clothes were dirty and tattered; they were the same ones he wore when he came to rescue her in Somalia. He was gone and she felt as if she now had a giant weight on her, it was crushing her chest. She wrapped her arms around her in attempt to hold herself together as she felt sick from the sight of Tony. She could hear Eli's malicious laugh in the background and she tried to turn away from Tony but she couldn't. The man she loved laid dead just in front of her, and she felt terrified and shattered. She had never felt so much despair before, so much loss. _

She woke up sweating and panting, her clothes were soaked and her face was sticky from her tears. She could feel the contents of her stomach come up her throat and dashed for the bathroom to vomit violently into the toilet. She couldn't seem to calm down, she knew it was a dream but it still felt so real. She had found out what it would feel like if she lost him for real, she knew she wouldn't be able to go on. She now fully understood what Gibbs had gone through with Shannon and Kelly. _How does he do it?_ She sat next to the toilet as she tried to clear her head but she was in hysterics, she couldn't calm herself. The images kept replaying over and over in her head and she felt terrified. She had experienced nightmares before many times since Somalia which were pretty horrific, but for some reason these were worse; even after she had woken up she still felt trapped in her dream.

* * *

Tony woke up to banging on his front door. Groaning he rolled over to look at the alarm clock on his bedside table.

"0345, come on!" He grabbed the pillow next to him pulling it across his face. It was a while before he again heard the banging and decided to get up and tell them to go away. He pulled on a white t-shirt and a pair of grey track pants as he shuffled to the front door rubbing his hand though his hair. When he got to the door he unlatched it before pulling it open ready to yell at whoever was on the other side for coming at 3:45 am.

"What do you want!" he saw her small figure jump a little as she looked up through red puffy eyes. He immediately regretted not checking who it was before he opened the door and he could tell that he just scared her off.

"I am sorry, you said to call I know but I…" she trailed off looking ashamed at her early morning wake up call. "I should not have come, I am sorry." She turned to walk away but was grabbed by the arm.

"No, no, no Ziva come in. I'm sorry about that I didn't know it was you." She looked down at her feet as she was ushered through into the living room and over to the sofa. "Would you like something?" She shook her head slowly and he could see that she was in a bad way. He sat down next to her on the sofa and tried to think of the best thing to say; he ended up going for the simple, straight forward question.

"What's wrong Ziva?" She looked down at her hands as she fiddled with her nails. He knew it would be hard for her to talk about it, so he waited patiently for a long time before she spoke.

"I had a nightmare." She felt so stupid as she said it, like a little kid who needs to climb into their parent's bed in the middle of the night because they are scared of monsters in the closet. "I am just being stupid, do not worry about it." She stood up to leave but again he would not let her go, catching her around the waist.

"It is not stupid Ziva." He brushed away her unruly hair from her face and she continued to stare at the floor. "What was it about?" He didn't know if that was the right thing to ask but it would be a whole lot easier if he knew what it was all about.

"I do not think I can tell you Tony, not now." She closed her eyes and swallowed big as she held back tears from the images that flooded through her head.

"That is okay, although I am not letting you go home again. You are staying here." She looked up at him to make eye contact for the first time since she walked in and started to shake her head in protest. "No buts. You are to sleep in my room, I will take the couch." He took her hand and led her into his bedroom where he straightened up the blankets and grabbed another one for himself. "If you need anything, I will be out here." He gave her a small smile and left the room.

* * *

When he first heard the blood curdling screams he thought it was part of his dream, but as he woke up to reality he realised it was Ziva. He launched off the sofa as he sprinted to his room.

"Tony, Tony, no, no, NO!" He was confused when he entered her room but realised she was not talking to him, that it was part of her nightmare. He rushed over to her and grabbed her shoulders as she fought against him. "Please no! How could you do this?" She continued to fight him and he was scared as to what her nightmare was actually about. From what she was saying it was almost like he had done something to hurt her and it pained him to see her in so much distress.

"Ziva, wake up. It's Tony, you're ok. Please Ziva just wake up." He could feel her struggling weaken as she woke up. Again she woke up with her eyes puffy, her face sticky and the feeling of being sick. She pushed Tony off her to the ground as she dashed for the bathroom again. He heard her vomit and became evermore worried of what these nightmares were about. He had never seen her so distressed and for it to make her sick meant it was something pretty horrific. He got up off the ground and followed her into the bathroom where she sat over the toilet. She continued to cry as she moved away and sat against the wall; her head between her knees. To see her so venerable made him uncomfortable about not knowing what to do. He didn't know whether to go near her as he had found out that he was the cause of her nightmares.

He stood in the doorway for a long time before she had finally seemed to calm herself down enough to stand up and walk back into the bedroom. She sat on the edge of the bed and looked up at him.

"I am so sorry." Was all she managed to get out as she whipped away the last few tears that escaped her eye lids. She took a deep breath before she started to explain herself. "The nightmare… it was about you." She looked away as the images again ran through her head of Tony lying in a pool of his own blood.

"I know. You seemed to be yelling at me, you said "_How could you do this?"_ She saw his pained expression as he misinterpreted the information he had. She quickly shook her head to say that he was wrong but he seemed to not understand.

"No, I was not saying that to you. I was saying that to… Eli. He had…" She quickly wiped the tear that had escaped with the back of her hand and Tony came over to sit with her on the bed. She took another deep breath before continuing. "He had… He had…"

"What did he do Ziva?"

"You were dead Tony, he had killed you." She had now lost control again as she sobbed. He could not believe what he had just heard and saw how much she really did care for him, she was in hysterics. He wrapped a long arm around her and pulled her close resting her head on his chest. She wrapped her arms around his waist and held him close locking her hands together behind his back. He rubbed circles on her back as he whispered into her hair.

"I'm not going anywhere." He felt her nod into his chest as her warm tears soaked through his cotton shirt and onto his bare skin. This Ziva was the Ziva inside, after you take off the many layers she puts on for work, the ones built by Mossad to hide any affection and feeling; you get the soft, sweet Ziva inside, the one he loved.

She lifted her head after they had sat there in each other's arms for what felt like eternity. They looked into each other's eyes before she glanced over towards the alarm clock on the table.

"I better get some sleep I guess." He nodded before kissing the top of her head and getting up. He walked to the door before he heard her speak again. "Tony, could you do one more thing for me."

"You name it."

"Stay", a smile crossed his lips before he took of his wet T-shirt and slid under the covers next to her. There he stayed with her protected in his arms, the sweet smell of her filling his lungs, something he had only dreamt about for so long.

**A.N: TADAAA! So I hope that was Tiva enough for everyone and I would realllly reallly love reviews pretttty Please! Haha Just a random thing, this reminds me of dispicable me:**

**Anges: Will you read us a bedtime story?**

**Gru: No.**

**Anges: Pretty Please?**

**Gru: The physical appearance of the please makes no difference.**

**Hahaha sorrry that was really random but I watched it yesterday with my little sister and quotes keep popping into my head. Gotta love it!**

**Anyways I really hope that was goood and pretty please review (LOL)**

**Keely, xx**


	21. Chapter 21

**A.N: OK so the last time I posted my chapter fanfic kinda crashed if you know what I mean, like it wouldn't let me log in or review so I am not sure if that happened to everyone? So it wouldn't upload and then blah blah blah. SO Hopefully this time it will work better with this chapter :) I rewrote this a couple of times and am not 100% happy with it but hopefully it is still ok. :)**

Tony stirred as the morning sunlight fell across his bed. He looked up to see the empty spot next to him and thought that maybe last night was just a dream. He felt disappointment that it was not real and sat up rubbing his face. He could have sworn that he fell asleep last night with Ziva in his arms and he started to reconsider as he felt it was so real. He looked over to the pillow next to him again and saw the dint of where her head once laid. It wasn't a dream, she was once there and it hurt even more to realise she had skipped out on him. He walked into the bathroom to splash water on his face and stared at the reflection in the mirror. He thought that things were finally getting better between them, they were finally getting closer, moving forward; but it did not seem to be the case. He felt slightly angry at her for leaving him, that she didn't have the decency to stay after what had happened, it was not like they slept together or anything; hell, they hadn't even kissed yet, not for real.

He smashed the palm of his hand against the wall as he ran the other through his hair. He looked up once again to see his reflection in the mirror and his eyes were drawn to the fading bruise on the side of his forehead. He was confused as to why she had left; after risking her life twice for him and seeking his comfort last night he thought that she really did care for him. He had told her that he loved her and she had finally admitted that she felt the same way; that she loved him too. So you could imagine his confusion by the mixture of messages she was now sending. He thought that maybe she loved him in a different way to what had come across; that she didn't have romantic feelings for him at all. That she meant that she loved him in a family way. Maybe she had only said it because she was in an emotional state, that now she has thought about it with a clear head she takes it back. As he thought of the possibilities he felt sick to his stomach and more depressed. He pushed off the wall and span around walking into the bedroom.

He started to make the bed and decided that he should go to work today. He still had the next 2 days off for 'recovery' but there was nothing to do, and he needed to take his mind off things. He was about to get dressed when a crashing sound came from the kitchen, it sounded almost like pots and pans and Tony was now on alert. Opening his bedroom door he slid out into the living room and moved across to the kitchen in a swift motion. He walked into the kitchen to see a pot lying on the ground next to the counter. No one seemed to be there, but then he heard the soft muttering of curses in Arabic and sure enough Ziva came out from behind the counter on her hands and knees.

"Ziva?" A smile crossed his face at the sight of her crawling around as well as the fact she hadn't left him that morning. He realised that his thoughts in the bathroom were wrong and he couldn't be more overjoyed to see her, the warm, fuzzy feeling inside his stomach again.

"Oh, you are awake. Sorry I was trying to be quiet but I dropped all these pots."

"What are you doing?" He said slowly, slightly amused. He was still shocked to find her in his kitchen and she looked up with a grin across her face, the complete opposite from the mood she was in last night.

"I was trying to make breakfast for us." A radiant smile lit up her face and he couldn't help but smile twice as large back.

"You don't have to do that, you should have woke me up."

"Oh no, it is ok; it is the least I can do. Besides, you looked tired as a frog." He didn't quite understand but then burst out laughing at yet another wrong Idiom.

"It is tired as a DOG, not frog." He looked at her with a bemused face as she rolled her eyes.

"Same difference" she grabbed the last saucepan before standing up and placing them on the bench.

"What are you cooking?"

"Eggs Benedict" she gave a small smile as she looked up at him.

"I don't think I have the ingredients for that, infact I am not sure if I have any food." He looked around the kitchen with a scrunched forehead as he tried to think of the last time he went shopping.

"That is why I went shopping this morning." She bent down to pick up two shopping bags full of food and placed them on the counter. "So are you going to help?" He gave her a 'if I have to' face before walking around the other side of the bench and helping her cook breakfast.

* * *

It was obvious that they were both very hungry as they ate in silence and finished in record time. Tony started to clear the table as Ziva sat back and watched him, a small smile playing her lips. Since Tony slid into bed with her last night and she had his arms wrapped around her the nightmares stayed away and she slept in for the first time in, well, pretty much her whole life. She looked up and down his bare chest and felt the sensation of just wanting to kiss him passionately as she felt his bare chest against hers. She saw him look up at her and knew she had been caught as the corners of his mouth twitched upwards.

"So, what do you want to do today?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well you have the day off, I have the day off, you have been stuck in that hospital forever. Let's get some fresh air, see the world." Tony's voice faded as he had now walked off into the kitchen with the dishes and she thought about what she really wanted to do but decided that it was too soon.

"I don't know, we can do whatever."

"How about the beach? I would love to see you in a bikini again." He had a dirty look on his face as she rolled her eyes.

"Do not think so, not with these stitches still in." He had forgotten about the gunshot wound that had almost killed her, and his smile faded.

"Oh yeah. When do you get them out?"

"Hopefully in a few days, it is pretty much healed. I am tempted to take them out myself, they are really irritating." Tony felt his eyes drift down to her waist as she said this, wondering what the wound now looked like. He walked towards her and sat on the vacant seat to her left.

"Uh, you don't have to if you don't want to, but, may I see." He pointed to her side and she looked down before slowly lifting the tank top she wore up, to show the wound. He saw the few stitches in her side and the scar only an inch over of the first bullet wound. It was only small and he could see that it had almost healed like she said. She pulled her shirt down again and repositioned herself as her face was neutral.

"I'm sorry Ziva." She looked up at him, shocked by what he had said and she frowned to hear it.

"Why? This is my fault, don't you dare say sorry. I got us both into this mess."

"But I was the one to get pissed at that bar and have my drink spiked. I wouldn't of got held hostage if I just went home, and you wouldn't have come and got…"

"Tony they would have got you anyway. I am still afraid that it is not over." Now it was Tony's turn to be shocked as he couldn't understand why she was still in danger. He thought she was safe now, they had killed the son of a bitch, was there someone else? She looked up at him her eyes sad like last night and her happy spirit of the morning nowhere to be seen. She instantly regretted the slip of the tongue as she was trying to avoid anyone finding out, she wanted to deal with it on her own. It may be nothing but if Eli was still in the country there may be a little trouble.

"Ziva, what aren't you telling me?" She shook her head slowly back and forth as she tried to avoid telling him, but his eyes were persistent. She sighed and stared at him, her face saying it wasn't important. He held his gaze and she caved in.

"Eli, he was behind it all."

"What!" Tony was now angry; _How could her own father! She almost died twice, not even mentioning Somalia!_ She could see the hatred and anger in his eyes, the protection. She knew what he wanted to do and she knew it would make it worse.

"Tony please, just calm down there is nothing that can be done." She reached out and grabbed his arm staring into his eyes in attempt to calm him.

"How can I calm down, I almost lost you, twice!"

"Tony, there is nothing you can do. It will only make it worse. Just please, forget about it." His eyes seemed to mellow as he knew it would upset her if he kept going. "Let us change the subject, what are we doing today?" Tony was about to answer when his cell phone shrilled and he grabbed it looking at the message that popped up on screen.

**Boss needs you in now to help question someone, we have a case. Says for Ziva not to come in.**

**McGee.**

A frown crossed Tony's face as he read the message and his heart sunk as disappointment set in.

"What?"

"Gibbs needs me in, we have a case." She saw her smile fade also.

"Oh, I will go and get ready then."

"No, he said that you must stay. Sorry we will have to do something some other time. You are welcome to stay here for as long as you like." Tony walked into the bedroom and Ziva followed standing outside his door. He started to grab some clothes from the wardrobe when a thought came to mind. "Hey Ziva"

"Yeah"

"Why don't you go home and grab some stuff. You are going to stay here for a while."

"What, why?"

"Just until you clean up your apartment and also until your...Just temporarily; it will be fun." He smiled at her and she nodded still considering whether it was a good idea. "Great, and also get something nice, I will take you out to dinner tonight, if that is ok?"

"Ah, yeah, sure" He looked up at her, her face unsure and he gave her a reassuring smile hoping to edge her on. She gave a small smile back before she walked back out to the kitchen while he got ready.

**A.N: A date? How will that turn out? haha **

**Well I hope it was ok, nothing really exciting happened I know, it was just a filler chapter again (sorry!) Please still review but! I only got one review for my last chapter and this made me sad and also makes me think that I didn't do a very good job :S The story will continue to become more Tivaish so stick around! Now does anyone want more McAbby? Please review and tell me what you would like, suggestions (and corrections) are always welcome and recieved greatfully! haha So thankyou, and goodnight! (or morning? Its night here atm haha)**

**Keely :o) **


	22. Chapter 22

**A.N: OK, sorry about these boring chapters... this one is the lead up for the next... so it is important, but short (SORRY!) I promise I will try and make the next chapter nice and long and I promise it will be very TIVA! I had to write this chapter otherwise... the next one wouldn't make sence hahaha. Hope it is ok, please review! :D**

"Hey McGoo, where's the Boss?"

"He said for you to meet him at interrogation." Tony had just walked into the bullpen and did his routine of sliding his keys, gun, wallet and badge into his top draw.

"So what's the case about?" McGee answered without lifting his eyes from the computer screen.

"Dead petty officer, Adam Croydon found shot near Bethesda Hospital. Looks like that's where he was heading before bleeding out. A man went out jogging around 0500 this morning and found him so he called us recognising the uniform. We tracked down his sister, uh… Lisa, Lisa Croydon. She's up in integration with Gibbs but he is not having any luck, looks like she knows a lot more than what she is letting on."

"Why is she in interrogation?"

"We talked to a… Luke Williams who said he went to college with the petty officer and that they are close friends. He said that Lisa was having a heated argument with him last night over something so we brought her in." Tony waited for more information and McGee looked up from his computer. "That's all we have, she won't say a thing."

"What about anything else, the sister is the only lead?"

"So far… That's why Gibbs called you in, to see if you can get anything out of her while I try and track something down."

"When did duck say his time of death was?"

"Between 0100 and 0300 this morning, single round to the chest, 22 calibre. Seemed he tried to make his way to the hospital but bled out."

"Well where did he come from McGee-e?"

"We don't know."

"How could you not know? If he bled out there would be a trail."

"We followed it down the footpath a bit then it just stopped, but there wasn't enough blood pooling or splatter to suggest that's where he was shot and no casings…"

"Which means he was dropped off there…?"

"Yes but who would shoot a guy then drops him off a few blocks from the hospital? And if he was shot then driven by someone else it still poses the same question; why not drive him all the way to the hospital?" Tony looked up to the skylights above the bullpen as he thought about this but came up with no explanation.

"Keep searching McGee, I'm going to see Gibbs." He walked off towards the interrogation room not knowing what to expect.

* * *

Tony walked into the viewing room to see Gibbs watching the suspect through the glass.

"Hey Boss, McGee filled me in and I heard that she's…" Tony stopped dead in his tracks as his eyes fell on the women behind the glass. Her long blonde hair was left out and framed her face, her green eyes were a shade so close to his and her slightly tan skin made her the perfect model. She wore a tight, short-sleeve, button up top which was not done up all the way showing the briefest of black cleavage.

"Tony, are you ok?" He looked up at the stunned senior field agent as he continued to stare at the women with his mouth wide open. He looked over slowly shaking his head and Gibbs could see the shock in his eyes.

"I knew that name sounded familiar." He closed his gaping mouth and swallowed looking quite nervous all of a sudden. Gibbs gave him a 'come on, spill it!' look on his face as he tried to work out what the hell just happened, and then he saw it; the recognition in his eyes.

"You know her?" He said throwing his head towards the glass, his look as equally as shocked as Tony's was previously.

"She's uhh… We kind of went out a while back."

"What happened?"

"Found out there was another man. She was uhh… engaged." A smile crossed Gibbs face as he thought of the many tragic relationships he got himself into. "Not funny Boss."

"Well you know what you are going to do DiNozzo?" He gulped as he waited for what was to come. "You are going to get some information out of her using the old 'DiNozzo charm'." He laughed at first, but when he realised that his Boss was being serious the smile quickly faded. This woman would easily be charmed, but he really didn't want her to; he remembered how clingy she was with him when they were 'dating' and he was hoping that she wouldn't get too attached; he was taken.

"Ah, sure thing, Boss." He started walking out of the room before he heard him speak again.

"I think Ziva will understand, Tony." He laughed nervously before walking out of the room and up to the next door. _God help me, _he thought before turning the handle and entering the room.

"Miss Croydon, I'm very special agent An…"

"Tony, is that you!" A smile formed as she recognised the familiar face.

"Lisa? Oh My God, it has been years!" One of 'Tony DiNozzo's charming smiles' spread across his face as he span the chair around and sat on in backwards.

"I know, I missed you!"

"It has been too long. I am so sorry for your loss also by the way." Her smile faulted as she looked down at her hands and nodded.

"I still can't believe it happened, my only brother." She didn't look up for some time before again speaking. "Why am I hear Tony?"

"Oh, we just have to clear a few things up, just protocol stuff, no biggie." A small smile returned as she looked back up at him bitting her bottom lip.

"Okay, what do you need to know?"

* * *

Tony left the interrogation room after reaching the conclusion that there was no way she could have killed her brother, and Tony also knew she wouldn't have the brains to. He remembered the time when he would go for the young, sexy and most of the time dumb women for the 'easy' relationship, not long term. It now amazes him to think of some of the women he had 'relationships' with in the earlier years; nothing like Ziva. She was smart, sophisticated, elegant and not just sexy but beautiful. She is independent, exotic, speaks her own mind, sexy accent; the list could go on and on.

Although he only flirted with the girl next door because Gibbs told him too, he felt terrible. In the past he would have done it shamelessly and then probably grabbed her number afterwards; but now, with Ziva, he only had eyes for her and no one else; and flirting with another women, no matter whether it was genuine or not made him feel terrible. He walked back into the viewing room to see Gibbs still standing there.

"We have nothing! No way she could have killed her brother. McGee checked, solid alibi." He rubbed his forehead with his hand as he looked down with frustration.

"What do you want me to do with her Boss?"

"She is free to go, escort her out Tony."

"Yes Boss" Tony was annoyed that he again would have to interact with her. The whole time he was in their the fake charm was on and by the way she held his gaze and bit down on her bottom lip he was sure she thought her was again interested in her. He walked around into the interrogation room again and she stood u as he walked in.

"So, what's the verdict?"

"You are free to go." He said with another wide grin and an arm gesturing out the door. She pranced out the door and span around waiting for him to close the door and follow. He lead her down to the bullpen with small talk of what had happened since they last saw each other and when they got to the elevator she grabbed his arm and turned to face him.

"It was nice seeing you again Tony, we should grab a drink some time."

"Yes, that would be great." He said with another fake smile plastered on,_ as if that's going to happen._

"Well here is my… number." She pulled out a card from her pocket and handed it to him biting her bottom lip again. What happened next, happened so fast and unexpectedly that he still can't even recall it to detail. She pushed the down button of the elevator before turning around and planting a kiss on his lips while her hand gripped his hair. The elevator made a 'ding' as the doors slid open but he couldn't pull away from her as she clung to him and forced her lips on his. He put a hand up to her face just under the jaw and pushed away finally getting her to stop; and he looked up at the elevator and saw a face through the crack of the closing doors which he wasn't expecting.

His heart sank as he realised it was Ziva.

**A.N: *GASP* Poooor Ziva! What would you think in that situation! Ok so I hope you liked, not as action packed as some of the others, but it is still important. I promise that there will be major Tiva next chapter and it will be nice and long so stay tuned peeps!**

**Thanks for reading and plaease review!**

**Keely :o)**


	23. Chapter 23

**A.N: Another Major TIVA chapter for my Tiva fans out there (like me! :D) OK, so I would really appretiate reviews on this chapter especially about whether I got the Tiva right! I do hope so :S This is a major chapter in my fic (well... most of them are :P) for the Tiva part of it. It is really hard to write in character when something like this has never happened before so we havent seen how they would react! Everyone has their own spin on it I guess so I hope you like mine :) I know it is a "rocky" relationship between them but thats how I would imagine it a first after all that tension for so long and them denying how they feel for so long we know it isnt going to be easy. Anyway hope you guys like this chapter, enjoy!**

Ziva stood in the elevator of the NCIS building as she watched the little light above the doors indicating the floors she passed. She knew Gibbs would kill her for coming into work when she was meant to be 'resting', but she was bored out of her mind. She waited as a man entered the lift on the third floor and she could feel his eyes scanning her the whole time they were in there together. Finally the doors opened on the 4th floor and he exited before she let out a shiver from how creepy the man was. She was again alone as she stood leaning on the rail that ran around the inside of the small lift.

She looked up as she heard the 'ding' of the elevators arrival to her floor and she walked towards the doors as they opened only to stop dead in the centre of the lift from what she saw outside. A Skinny, young, blonde women had one hand around Tony's neck as the other clenched his hair. She clung to him as her lips moved hard against his and even when the doors had completely opened neither of them looked up. She didn't wait for an explanation as she quickly leant over and pushed the 'close doors' button shortly followed by the 'G' button for the ground floor. Her eyes couldn't tear away from him as the doors started to close and just before they had shut completely she saw his shocked face look up at her through the crack.

She now knew why cheating was a motive for murder as anger and heartache built up inside her. Her chest became tight and she could barely breathe as she held onto the railing for support. She felt the walls around her emotions quickly being rebuilt as she remembered why she had them in the first place, so that she wouldn't get hurt. She had let Tony inside after almost 5 years of trying to block him out and when she finally does he turns around and stabs her in the back, she didn't quite get that Idiom as it felt more like stabbing through the heart. She clung to her chest as she felt a pain she had never experienced before. She wanted to kill him; there was no other way to put it. She just saw her partner, the man she loved making out with another women, some blonde bimbo, after saying that he loved her.

She contemplated going back upstairs and shooting him but decided it was best just to get away. The elevator opened on the ground floor and she ran out the front doors and went for the carpark only to stop and change directions as she realised she was in no condition to drive. Her hands were shaking, her breathing was erratic and her heartbeat was through the roof. Her hands balled in anger and at the same time she tried to hold back tears. She could not believe that this was happening, to her of all people; she use to be smart not letting her emotions get in the way of her job, her life. She wanted to run but her legs would not carry her so she found a spot in the park and sat on a park bench far away from the crowds. It was her bench, she would normally grab a coffee and sit here because she could be alone, and now this is what she needed.

* * *

Lisa pushed the down button of the elevator before turning around and planting a kiss on Tony's lips while her hand gripped his hair. The elevator made a 'ding' as the doors slid open but he couldn't pull away from her as she clung to him and forced her lips on his. He put a hand up to her face just under the jaw and pushed away finally getting her to stop; and he looked up at the elevator and saw a face through the crack of the closing doors which he wasn't expecting. His heart sank as he realised it was Ziva.

The doors closed and Tony stood there dumbfounded for a second before he leapt forward and pushed the down button repeatedly. When the doors would not open he ran for the stairs not worrying about the cries from Lisa behind him of "what are you doing! Tony!" He sprinted down the fire escape to the ground floor where he guessed she would be heading and burst through the door making everyone stare at him. He ran to the front door and jumped the turnstile as he made his way for the carpark. He couldn't believe Lisa had kissed him, what gave her the right to do that! He thought, and what was more unbelievable and most terrible was the fact that Ziva had turned up at that exact moment, she wasn't even meant to be at work.

He ran to his car but stopped when he realised that Ziva's car was still in her parking space next to his. Had he beat her there? He thought to himself but realised that could not be possible, not with Ziva. He tried to think of where she possibly could be. She wouldn't have stayed inside would she? Or maybe he did beat her and she was still in the lift. He couldn't even begin to imagine the state she was in but he knew she would be furious. He didn't know whether it was cheating on her or not because he didn't know if they were even a 'thing' yet. It didn't matter whether it was technically cheating or not because he knew that it would make her angry and hurt her, he felt a dull ache in his chest as he thought about it. He knew finding her would be a suicide mission and but he didn't care, he had to try and explain himself. He was hoping to take her out for a nice dinner tonight, he was hoping that tonight would mark the start of a long waited relationship between the two, but that would not seem to happen now.

He decided that the next place to look was the elevator. He ran back to the front doors but could see through the glass that people were walking in and out of it; no Ziva. He leant back against the wall of the building and pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger as he exhaled with a groan. _This cannot be happening._

He could not go back inside yet, he was too distraught; so he decided to take a walk. He pushed off the wall and started to walk towards the park on the Navy base. It was one of his favourite spots as it was lined with coffee stands and the atmosphere, especially in the spring, was inviting. He would come out almost every day with his partner to grab a coffee and sit outside in the fresh air and sunshine, away from the rat race of Navy officers and Agents. As he thought about this the thought occurred to him and he knew where she would be. If she was not in the building and still in the Navy yard then she would be on her favourite park bench were she would almost every day drink her coffee, sometimes with him. His pace sped up as he walked quickly, almost a jog to the other end of the park where the gardens meander through many pathways.

He could see half the park bench from behind a tree that stood in front of him and he felt disappointed seeing that no one sat there, but as he moved another few steps and the bench was in full view he saw her. She sat squished down one end of the bench with her legs crossed in front of her as she pulled apart what seemed to be part of a plant in her hands. Her hair was pulled back into a pony tail which went down past her neck on one side and she wore a brown leather jacket over a purple top and blue straight jeans. He watched her for a while thinking of the best line of attack. He knew as soon as she saw him she would put up her guard and fight against him; he knew she would be angry and probably wanted to kill him. He had no idea how he was going to explain himself when she wouldn't let him, but he was still going in.

He took a deep breath before stepping around the tree and walking towards her rubbing both of his clammy hands on the back of his jeans. He was nervous to say the least as he continued to creep closer to her and her head snapped up as he stood on a stick, snapping it. She looked up, eyes glazed over at first but then she started to realise what was happening and stood up to make her escape.

"Ziva no. Let me explain."

"Go away Tony, I do not want to see you!"

"Well I am sorry but you're not going to have a choice, I am going to talk and you are going to listen." She looked shocked at how firm he was but he knew it is what he had to do to get her to listen.

"No, you listen Tony! I remember coming here and everyone thought I was some emotionless assassin. Well you know what, you were right. I had no emotions, I had no feelings, I never let anyone get into my head and you know what! I was like that for a reason, so stuff like this would never happen. Why could you not just leave me alone Tony! I was fine but you had to play with my head, make me think that you cared, that you loved me. That… feelings and emotions were a good thing!" He stood there listening as she vented but he had now heard enough, he too was getting frustrated with her and needed her to know the truth before anything else got brought up unnecessary.

"They are a good thing Ziva! That means you are normal! Now listen to me, I didn't just make you think I care about you and love you; it is true, I do! And if you would just let me explain for 5 seconds you would see that! What you saw was not what really happened! She just came on to me and I couldn't stop her. It was so unexpected!"

"Oh save it Tony, just tell me the truth!"

"I am! She was the suspect Gibbs wanted me to question! She is not some, secret girlfriend of mine."

"How could a suspect just end up… making out with you Tony! When those elevator doors open you guys did not even stop!"

"I couldn't! She latched onto me so tightly I could barely breath, I tried to push her off and when I finally did you were gone!" His eyes were sad and she could see this as her eyes softened slightly. The story was crazy and unbelievable but his eyes seemed to be telling the truth; her heart wanted to just accept it as the truth, but she has always followed her head and she was so angry that she just couldn't accept it. "Gibbs said for me to charm her so we could get some information out of her, I didn't want to… I knew it would hurt you but he said that you wouldn't mind. I couldn't argue with him!"

"You charmed her that much did you. That she fell madly in love with you and she just happened to kiss you… like that!"

"She was my ex and she thought…"

"She is your Ex!" Tony knew he said the wrong thing as soon as it slipped out and with that he had pushed her over the edge. She ran up to him and slapped him hard across the face and then shoved his chest. She span around and began to walk away fuming. Tears burnt her eyes and she couldn't contain them any longer as she sped up to be alone. Tony tasted blood in his mouth but it didn't stop him. He was not letting her walk out of his life again, not like this.

"Ziva, I love you and I can't live without you. I am telling you the truth!" She stopped at this so very tempted to turn around. She was starting to believe him but there was no evidence, she had seen him kiss her and her brain could not fathom that he had nothing to do with it. She started to walk away again a little slower this time and she soon felt him grab her arm and spin her around. He held her by the elbow on both sides to keep her still as she slightly struggled against him.

"What are you doing!"

"I am not letting you walk out of my life. If you do I will not be able to function, you mean the world to me Ziva and I am sorry that it took so long to finally say it. I know how hard it was for you to say you loved me too and I have never felt so happy and content in my life. If you walk away from me now I swear to god…" The anger left her eyes as she realised that he was telling the truth, he loved her. That was that. He looked into her eyes as she stared back not sure at what was now going to happen. Tony was waiting for her to say something but when she didn't he couldn't help himself any longer. He leant down towards her and his lips met hers as one of his hands slid up to her face. She didn't respond right away but it felt right. Heat rushed through her as she relaxed against him and her lips finally moved with his. Her hands ran up his chest as his went around her hips pulling her close against him. Her hands wrapped around his neck and one tangled with his hair as the kiss became more forceful and heated. Her tongue slid between his lips into his mouth as she tried to get closer. They had both imagined what this moment would be like and now that it was happening it felt even better. After a while he finally pulled away from her and ran two of his fingers down her cheek touching her lips.

"Do you believe me now?" A smile spread across her face as she nodded sliding her hands down onto his chest before wrapping her arms around his waist and pressing the side of her face against his chest. They stood there in each other's arms and a smile played her lips as she listened to the quickness of his heartbeat.

**A.N: SO I would LOVE you suggestions as to what you would like to see happen next! Also whether I got the Tiva side if it right for you guys and whether I can improve it! Thanks for reading and can't wait to hear from you and to write the next chapter! Hopefully soon!**

**Keely :o)**


	24. Chapter 24

**A.N: HELLLO! I am sorrry it took so long I have been helping a friend of mine (Alli, ForeignMusicLyrics) write her fic and well I have had alot on, plus truth be told I had writters block... haha. So I hope you really like this chapter and it is not too OOC because it is hard to write about something that hasn't actually happened before in NCIS, and even tho there are soooo many tiva fics everyone writes the relationship differently... so I really hope you like it. :D**

For the rest of the day, Tony spent it thinking of the kiss shared between Ziva and himself earlier, how good it felt to finally kiss her for real with her body pressed against his and the electricity that ran through him as her soft lips pressed hard against his. He felt like the happiest man on earth, he felt like he was floating and no one could pull him back down to reality. The feeling was so surreal; but he knew it that it real did happen, he finally kissed her. They had both finally gotten over their cold feet and taken the leap of faith between each other.

* * *

After their moment in the park earlier that day Ziva had gone home to grab some stuff to take back to Tony's apartment as he had suggested that morning. She was not moving in with him but just temporarily staying with him as her apartment was almost unliveable. Glass was shattered across the floor, papers were scattered, the place was turned upside down and her bedroom was stained red with blood from where Anah was murdered. She felt a wave of sadness dampen her previously bright mood as she stared at the dried blood that covered her walls, bed and floor. To think that he had risked his life to send her a message that in the end saved both herself, as well as Tony. She looked away as she walked to her wardrobe and turned on the light, she had no idea what to take to his apartment as she grabbed an empty suitcase and filled it with random items from her dresser. As she was about to leave she remembered something that Tony had said to her that morning about dinner. She felt around in her pocket for her mobile phone and pulled it out, wiping her thumb across the smudged screen. She had no idea whether dinner was still on and she seemed nervous to ask him and even more nervous to talk to him. She had butterflies in her stomach as she couldn't bring herself to call him, she felt stupid having feelings like that but she couldn't make them go away. She couldn't understand why it made her so nervous to call Tony, she always does what's so different now? She decided to play it safe not trusting her voice and text him. Her thumbs flew across the keypad as she wrote a simple text and her thumb hovered over the 'send' key for what seemed like forever before she squeezed her eyes shut, pushed send and threw her phone on the bed.

_Hey, I was just wondering if we still had dinner plans?_

_Ziva_

She sat on the edge of the bed after ripping the bloody covers off that had not yet been washed and sat down staring at the phone. Her heart pounded in her chest as she waited for a reply. Minutes went by and her confidence slipped away, _was he not bothering to reply? _She got a lot more nervous and agitated as she paced the room glancing at the phone now and then and she realised how much she wanted to go to dinner with him, to dress up. The feelings she now felt amused her a little in a way, as she had never felt them before and she realised how hard it was just to be away from him as she waited for the reply. Her phone beeped as a message came in and she launched at it landing on the bed. She flipped it open and read the message with a smile spreading across her face that she couldn't contain.

_Defiantly, I can't wait. Work is really boring and poor McGee has been in Gibbs bad books since he spilt his coffee, haha._

She laughed at the last part, playing the scene out in her head. She couldn't wait to go back to work with her family, and most importantly Tony. She replied to his text immediately but waited a bit before sending it so it didn't seem stalker-ish.

_Poor McGee, can you tell me where we are going?_

This time when she put the phone down she went and grabbed a glass of water from the kitchen to wet her dry mouth and throat. She purposely took forever to drink it so that she wouldn't have to wait long for a reply and when she returned to the bedroom she got excited seeing the screen lit up with a '1 new message' on it. She walked over and sat on her bed before again flipping the phone open and reading the message.

_It is a surprise, I will meet you at my apartment around 1930 and then we can go, where something nice… and sexy. Oh and wear heels… and leave your hair out, I love it out _

_Well, it doesn't really matter you always look damn beautiful. Can't wait to see you,_

_Tony_

Her heart had now sped up at least a hundred times what it was before and she felt her cheeks burn. She read the message over and over and felt stupid that one text message could cause her so much happiness and butterflies. She couldn't contain her giggles as she read about the heels and leaving her hair out, he could always make her laugh and that is what she loved about him. She decided not to text him back so that he would be more excited to see her tonight, make him wait it out she thought. She looked up from her phone to see a strip of red hanging out of the wardrobe and she walked over to see what it was. She looked at the dress and knew it was perfect, she couldn't wait for dinner, and she couldn't wait to impress.

* * *

Tony walked into his apartment after finally leaving work, it was already 1945 and he knew Ziva would give him crap about being late. He dropped his keys into the bowl next to the door and walked sluggishly towards his bedroom. He really felt too tired to go out but because it was with Ziva he didn't care.

"Ziva?"

"You are late!" He heard her shout from the kitchen with a playful tendency and he smiled, he knew her too well.

"Sorry, Gibbs made me finish a report before leaving, still hasn't let McGoo go but." He chuckled at this while he walked into his bedroom, in a way he felt sorry for McGee, although he picks on the young field agent, he does it for his own good to build up character and confidence. Although, sometimes he also does it for fun, he is like a little brother to Tony and brothers do not always get along. He got out his gun, badge and handcuffs and threw them on the bed as he loosened his tie standing in front of the wardrobe. He span around at the sound of his gun to see Ziva standing there looking at the barrel.

"You need to take more care of it." She purred as she fiddled with it but Tony was not paying much attention. His eyes roamed her bare legs that looked perfectly shaped by her red and black stilettos. She wore a tight fitting strapless red dress that stopped half way down her thighs. Her hair was left out and curls fell down past her shoulders, not her normal crazy tight curls, but big smooth curls that started half way down the length of her hair. She wore the slightest amount of makeup to high the almost faded scars but she didn't need it, she looked stunning. "What?"

"You, ahh… Wow." Was all he could get out, over-exaggerating the word "wow" and she smiled at him making her look even more beautiful. She put the gun on the bed and picked up the hand cuffs swinging them around her finger absent minded. "We can use those later if you want to." He said raising an eyebrow. She gave him a playful look before dismissing it and throwing them on the bed again. He walked up to her with a serious face again and put a hand on her cheek looking into her eyes before slowly leaning down and kissing her on the lips tenderly. It was short but full of emotion as he pulled away and gave her a soft smile.

"Are you ready to go?" She smiled and nodded before he took her hand and led her out of his apartment and to his car.

* * *

As they pulled up she could see the small French restaurant across the street and smiled, she loved French.

"Gibbs said that you cooked him French, so I thought why not. You do like French food right?"

"Yes, I love French. Since when do you get advice from Gibbs about what type of food I eat?" He tapped two fingers to the side of his nose and got out of the car. She smiled at the thought he had consulted Gibbs and before she knew it her side door was open as he waited for her to get out. "Thankyou" she mumbled embarrassed that she didn't get out fast enough and she felt his hand slide to the small of her back as they crossed the street and entered the restaurant.

"Do you have a reservation sir?" said the man behind the counter not lifting his eyes to look at them. Ziva saw Tony gulp from the corner of her eye, he hadn't made a reservation.

"Oh no, we forgot… Look…" She waited for the man to look up from behind the counter before she put on her sexy voice and battering eyelids. "I am agent Ziva David from NCIS and, this is my partner and we have been working a long case, we just wanted to celebrate at your lovely restaurant, it is truly the best French I have tasted in DC, are you sure you couldn't just squeeze us in… for me." She smiled warmly at him and bit down on her bottom lip. It did the trick as he smiled back blushing at the sudden attention. Tony stood back admiring his girlfriend work her magic and he truly knew how lucky he was to have her as he saw some of the guys in the restaurants eyes roam her, she was a catch and he knew it.

"I am sure we can squeeze you and…"

"Special agent DiNozzo"

"Very special Anthony DiNozzo" he corrected as he gave a charming smile. Ziva looked back at him to roll her eyes and he gave a cheesy grin back at her.

"Yes, we would be honoured to have two of our cities crime fighters to have dinner with us."

"Merci" she again gave a stunning smile before he led them through to a private table in the far corner of the restaurant. They ordered their drinks and the waiter walked away with a slight twist in his step and she could no longer hold in the giggles she was containing. Tony looked up at her as she started to laugh with a questioning but amused look on his face as he cracked one of his charming smiles trying to hold back laughter himself.

"I cannot believe that worked!"

"Trust me Ziva, it is not that amazing."

"What is that suppose to mean?"

"Trust me I am sure you can make any guy do anything for you."

"Yes, but normally it is a little more violent" Tony couldn't help but laugh at her, his little ninja. He stopped when he realised she was being very much serious and looked at him confused.

"Maybe we should think about what we are going to order, the waiter will be back soon." She nodded and they both looked down at their menus peeking up through their eyelashes at each other, not being able to wipe the smiles off their faces.

* * *

He lurked in the shadows across from the small but popular French restaurant and watched the women inside. He had been following her all day but was not sure why he was, it was an order, no questions asked. She sat near a window near the back of the room with a man which he found out was special agent Anthony DiNozzo. He was not sure why, but the director did not like then man. When calling him with the latest on what the women was doing he had mentioned that she was intimate with the NCIS agent and he sounded quite angry, infact furious. He was not quite sure who the woman was, all he knew was she was ex-Mossad and had the same last name as his director also, but he was not sure of the relation.

He got a message saying to leave, that his job was done. So without question he took one last look at the women and went home.

**A.N: OK, please review! I am near the end of this fic just a few more chapters left so please review! I want to write it right for you guys! Also! I am in the midst of brainstorming for my next fic and I have a few ideas but I would LOVE to hear any suggestions? What would you like me to write about? :) So please review on this and also suggestions for my new fic which I hopefully will start very soon! (not necessarily after I finish this... Might write them both at the same time :P)**

**Thanks so much! I appreciate it Large time! (as Ziva would put it :P)**

**Keely :o)**


	25. Chapter 25

**A.N: Sorrry about how short it is! But I was falling aseep typing it haha and then I forgot what I was saying so I would have to reread what I wrote and la la la, so this is just a short TIVA filled chapter to keep you guys going :D **

Tony payed for the bill after putting up a fight with Ziva in front of the waiter about who will pay, he had won amazingly even tho she glared at him and threatened him; all he did was simply handed over his card and the waiter walked away before she had a chance to do anything. He smiled triumphantly at her while she huffed, before rolling her eyes and sending a kick his way as he yelped with her heel digging into his shin.

"Woops, forgot about the heels." Now she was the one smiling as a playful look flashed across her face. The waiter came back in less than a minute with a receipt and Ziva drunk the last mouthful of her red wine before they both stood up and left the restaurant. They were walking across the street and towards the car before she was pulled by tony in a different direction and down the road.

"What are you doing Tony; where are we going?" She felt him wrap an arm around her waist and pull her a little closer as they walked towards the darkness.

"I thought, the night is still young and it is full moon, why not have a walk around the park. You haven't been out in a while; the fresh air will be good." She smiled as he kept leading her down the road towards the park. She looked up at the moon which had a tinge of yellow to it and it looked like it was closer than usual. He was right, it was the perfect night to go for a walk, and she would never have imagined he was such a romantic. She was nervous at the beginning of the night, she hadn't had feelings like this before and she had never had to express them; by now she had realised they come naturally, she didn't have to think about how to act, she didn't have to make a plan of execution, she just had to enjoy his company and be herself.

Tony looked at her amused as he tried to figure out what she was thinking as she looked up at the sky. She had acted in a way he had never seen her before tonight, but it was good. She was acting like a girlfriend, like his girlfriend, and he couldn't be happier. As they walked along a cool breeze swept through and he felt her press against his side even more as she leant her head against his chest to keep the wind out of her face. He then realised she had no coat; she just had her strapless, sexy as hell, tight red dress on. He thought about giving her his coat but would that be too stereotypical, like in all the movies were the guy gives the girl his coat; would she let him? He contemplated this for a while but as the breeze picked up and he could see the Goosebumps forming on her perfect gold skin; he knew he had to give her the jacket, she was freezing!

"Here take this." He said as he slipped his jacket off.

"Oh, no, no, I could not take your jacket." She waved her hands in front of her gesturing not to take it off anymore. "I am fine."

"Ziva, you are freezing I can see that you have Goosebumps. Besides, I'm not cold, please just take it." She looked at him for a while before slowly nodding and he draped it around her shoulders rubbing his hands up and down her arms to cause friction. "See, isn't that better?" She gave him a small smile not letting on how much she really appreciated it and how sweet she thought it was. Normally Tony would have his date back at the apartment right now either drinking or getting undressed but with Ziva it was different. Although they had not talked about it he knew they both wanted to take it slow, after five years they didn't want to mess it up especially because they had finally gotten Gibbs approval on the matter of them 'dating'. When he thought about it, sure sex was great and he couldn't wait to finally get that moment of passion with Ziva, but he was also extremely happy having her by his side, just walking with her under the night sky. Now that he had taken his jacket off he realised that it really was quite cold as he felt Goosebumps of his own forming, although he would never let Ziva find out about that; so he just wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close again to feel her body heat against his side.

She felt him lean down and kiss the top of her head and it made her smile, she had never felt so loved and important in her life, just to have someone who loved her as much as Tony made her feel the happiest she has ever felt. Although it took them both a near death experience to realise that they needed each other in a more intimate way, she was glad it turned out the way it did. When they had gotten to a small lake in the middle of the park she stopped and stood in front of him. She looked up at him and placed a hand on the side of his face gently standing on her tippy toes and kissing him on the lips tenderly. She slipped her hand down around his neck as his slid up to the side of her face as his lips came back harder on hers. She felt him start pushing her backwards as they walked and she hoped he knew where they were going. She felt his tongue trace her lips as the kiss became more passionate and she let them part as his tongue found hers. There was no way she could be cold now as heat rushed through her and her heart skyrocketed. She felt her back against a tree as he pushed her against it and kissed deeper and more passionate than he has before; her hands tangled with his hair as his roamed her back and pulled at her curls. She moaned as his lips left her mouth and explored down her neck, his tongue in the hollow. She arched her back and pressed harder against him as she let her head fall back on the tree as he continued to go up and down her neck, tasting the sweetness of her skin, something he has wanted to do for the past 5 years. If they were at his apartment then they may have gone further but for now this was as good as it gets, and they did want to take things kind of slow; although they both didn't know how long that would last. He found her lips again as the kiss once again became more tender then passionate and heated. She mumbled his name against his lips and he pulled away looking into her eyes.

"Well that was nice" she said while she put her hand to the side of his face, her thumb ever so softly running across his lips. He hummed in agreement as he leaned in for one last peck before pulling her close to him and beginning to walk again back towards the car.

**a.n: I hope that was TIVA enough for you all ;P SO I WOULD LOVE! to know how I went and also as I said last chapter I am starting to write my next TIVA fic so please, any suggestions about what u want to hear? What kind of Tiva fic would you guys like? **

**Thanks again,**

**Keely :o)**


	26. Chapter 26

**A.N: Ok, so sorry it is short again but action packed hahaha. I have been working on my new fic which I put up earlier today called Foreign (check it out! LOL) so that is why my chapters are a little shorter and that, im so tired once I finally get a chance to write it! haha. Anyway I hope its still good, thanks to all of you who have reviewed! You guys are the best! :D**

Tony's phone began to ring in the early hours of the next morning as he felt Ziva stir next to him. He didn't even register that he had to answer it to stop it ringing as he was still waking up.

"Answer your stupid phone…" Ziva mumbled as she rolled over and hit him lightly with the back of her hand. He groaned before leaning over and grabbing it off the bedside table and sitting up groggily.

"Yep" he slurred into the receiver as her rubbed his eyes. "Oh, ok… yes I will tell her. Yes, I will see you soon director." Her ears pricked up as soon as she heard "director" and Tony hung up the phone.

"We need to get up, the director wants us in his office in half an hour"

"What is this about?"

"He didn't say…" This automatically got her worried as she sat up running a hand through her unruly hair. What could possibly have the director calling after her and Tony at 0600. Tony saw the expression on her face as she tried to think what it could possibly be about, only coming up with bad situations. "Zi, it's going to be ok, I'm sure it's nothing too major" He leant over and gave her a kiss on the cheek before jumping out of bed and walking over to the wardrobe. She looked at his bare chest as he stood there in only a pair of grey slacks and she zoned out; they had not yet slept together because they did not want to screw up their relationship, not after everything that has happened. She was happy with that at the moment, just having his company was all she needed and that made her feel that little bit better about this morning's upcoming event, at least Tony would be with her. They were both ready and in the car within 15 minutes as they nervously drove towards the NCIS building awaiting their fate.

* * *

"The director will see you now." Tony squeezed Ziva's hand before they both stood up and walked towards Vance's office door not knowing at all what to expect when they opened it. She reached out and grabbed the handle hesitating before finally turning it and walking inside with Tony close behind. What she saw was the last thing she expecting and anger had already begun to build up inside as she saw the man across the room. He smiled as if nothing had happened and that everything was peachy between them, which it was most definitely not. Here, standing with arms spread wide and happy smile on his face was her father, if she could even call him that, Eli David.

"Ziva, how are you?"

"What are you doing here?" Was all she could spit out at him and his expression faltered a bit at the iciness of her tone. Tony stood behind her and could see her tense; he knew this would not end well. What he didn't understand was why he had been called in too, it was Ziva's father not his.

"I came to see my daughter, to see how you have recovered."

"Did you not listen to me last time; I do not want to see you!" Vance looked confused as if he had missed something, he was expecting a happy family reunion, (well as happy as it could be for the dysfunctional family) but what he was seeing was pure hate on Ziva's part and it had seemed he had missed an earlier conversation. Eli's act quickly disappeared as it was replaced with annoyance.

"Ziva, why do you have to be so difficult towards your father?"

"You are not my father…"

"Yes I am! Stop saying things like that! You are my daughter and you are going to listen to me…" She became furious and the room started again spinning like it had in the hospital, _not again. _"Director Vance I have come to take my daughter home." Now Vance was in complete shock, he had no idea this was coming, he thought it was just to check-up on her wellbeing.

"I'm sorry, what?" was all the Director of NCIS could get out, he was in complete shock.

"I am not going home, infact this is my home, I am at home! This is my family!" She grabbed for Tony behind her mainly for support as the room continued to spin as her vision worsened. He walked up to her and grabbed a hold of her hand. He was almost as angry as she was with Eli, infact he wanted to walk right over and give him a left hook but decided to stay controlled for Ziva's sake; as well as the fact the director was still in the room with them. Vance saw the situation and thought it best to leave as he walked over to the door.

"I will let you guys sort this out in private." Was all he said before walking out of the room closing the door behind him. What happened next was completely unexpected, Eli now turned on Tony.

"You!" He was furiously jabbing a finger towards Tony as he walked towards him. Ziva stood in the way pushing him back to the other side of the room again.

"You leave Tony out of this! This is between you and me!"

"You're sleeping with him aren't you?" This stopped Ziva as she just stood there looking at her father.

"No, what would even make you say that!"

"You have been going out with him Ziva, you went out for Dinner last night, and you kissed him!"

"You had me followed!" This pushed her over the edge, she could not take it anymore. "Why can you not just leave me alone! You did when I was stuck in Somalia for 3 months! I had every means of torture done to me, I was… I almost died!" Tony cringed as he thought about what she was going to say, he watched as she let it all out, what her dreams must have been about, what she swore she would never talk about. He watched as the tears streamed down her cheeks, every time she said she was fine she was lying. He could see how much she still carried with her everyday and maybe for the rest of her life. His heart felt like it was on fire and he could barely stand to see her in so much pain, but he knew she had to let it out. "You are dead to me Eli! I never want to see you in my life, I do not want to ever hear a word breathed of you, you do not exist to me!" She walked over to were Tony stood and crashed into him, against his chest as she sobbed. His eyes stayed on Eli as both of their eyes met, both filled with rage and hatred, both looking for a fight.

"Ziva, you are my daughter and you have no choice, you are coming home with me now to your country." Tony only just realised an important detail that she had forgotten to mention. She never told Eli that she was an American citizen, that she was a true NCIS agent, no longer still part of Mossad. Tony felt her nails dig into him as he looked down to see her grabbing his shirt into her fists trying to not lose control. He had never seen her so angry in his life and it frightened him to see what might come.

"I am an American citizen, you cannot take me anywhere!" It was apparent that Eli had not known of this and now they had both been pushed over the edge, they were all infuriated. Eli paced forward and ripped Ziva out of Tony's arms holding her by both wrists in front of him.

"You are telling me, that you went behind my back and are now an American citizen!"

"Behind your back? You had no right to know!" Eli slapped her hard across the face and threw her onto the ground. She laid there sobbing and not moving, she was too broken to fight back, she had lost all control, she had been pushed too far, and so had Tony. He walked up and punched Eli hard in the face; he could feel his nose break beneath his fist as he yelled in agony. Tony then ran to where Ziva was on the floor barely conscious. Her face had turned a scary shade of purple and was already starting to swell; he had hit her incredibly hard. Tony pulled her into his arms and looked back up to where Eli stood, blood running down his face. Vance opened the door and rushed in after hearing the yelling and saw the scene, he felt stupid for leaving, what did he expect to happen? Security guards flooded in with Gibbs and took Eli away yelling and fighting but Tony didn't notice as Ziva sobbed in his arms.

**A.N: I felt to leave it here, otherwise I would have gone on for ever haha and I am suppperr tired! So please tell me what u think of the whole "ELI" thing haha**

**Keely :o)**


	27. Chapter 27

**A.N: Last chapter everyone! Sorry it has been soo long since I updated but I have had alot on at schoool + I have been writing my other fic 'Foreign', so if you haven't checked it out... check it out :D**

**It took me a while to do this and I do hope that it is a good ending because it has been a long story haha. I Just want to thank again everyone who has read/reviewed/alerted/ fav this story over how ever long ago I started writing it :D it has meant soo much to me especially for my first ever fic! So please enjoy and review for my final chapter it will be very much appretiated. Love you all! ENJOY! :D**

Gibbs rushed into Vance's office to see two of his team members on the ground, one barely conscious. He then looked up to see a man he despised, pitied, loathed; Eli David. He held his nose looking straight at him, infuriated, and Gibbs put the pieces together in his head and realised what had happened. He smiled on the inside knowing Tony had punched him yet was distraught by the sight of Ziva on the ground and enraged at the sight of Eli. She was usually the only one left standing in a room, yet she was the one on the floor, and the director of Mossad was to blame. He calmed himself slightly first before walking right up to Eli and grabbing him by the collar, dragging him from the room. As soon as they were outside he smashed him against the wall, faces only inches away, and stared deep into his eyes. Fury was an understatement at what he was experiencing as he looked at the Israeli, and he had to stop himself from knocking him out completely right there and then.

"You listen to me; you stay the HELL away from Ziva! She is no longer part of your life and if you even come back into this country I will make sure you regret it."

"She is my daughter, you can't keep her from me." He said in a hoarse voice as the grip Gibbs had on his collar tightened around his neck.

"I have already taken out Salim for her… I won't stop with you. She is more of a daughter to me than she ever was and ever will be to you; and if anything happens to her I will not hesitate in taking you out. Are we clear on that?" The grip around his throat was now tighter than ever and he could barely breathe, he nodded his reply and was suddenly released before being dragged away.

* * *

She started to notice her surrounding and could hear footsteps pacing up and down where ever she was. She didn't open her eyes as she tried to think of what had happened and how she had gotten to where she was. She felt the cold slab of what seemed to be metal under her and as she smelt the mixture of chemicals and over sterilizing she realised where she was; autopsy. She could tell the lights were dim or completely off in the room by the lack of glowing from behind her eyelids and she only just started to feel the pain in her head. _What happened to me?_ She felt someone take her hand and her eyelids flew open as she tried to get away only to realise that the room was spinning and she was falling. Again she could feel the floor beneath her and a new pain in her elbow as she hit her funny bone on the edge of the autopsy table. _What are the chances of hitting my funny bone… why is it even called that? stupid name. _She knew she was safe as everything came into contrast; she was in the NCIS autopsy room with Tony and Ducky. She felt Tony draw her into an embrace as she still lay on the ground and she couldn't help but smile to herself as she felt his warm arms.

"I am fine" she said as she looked up at him smiling and feeling quite embarrassed. He frowned down at her not buying it; well she did just try to jump of a table and run for dear life, but she was just confused. She still couldn't remember how she had actually gotten into the room and how she was knocked out but she would ask later, right now she just wanted to get up and be fine. "Seriously Tony, just help me up." She tried standing up and he grabbed her arms to help her sit on the edge of the table. Ducky was already examining her as she tried to shake it off with more "I am fine" although neither of them were buying it.

"My dear, follow the light with your eyes." She did just that and although her headache spread into her eye sockets as she tried to do it she put on a brave face wanting to get out. She glanced over at Tony now and then as he stood there with a worried look on his face. Every time she looked at him he seemed to be scanning the side of her face and when the pain started to kick in and she put the pieces together, she remembered what had happened to her.

"Oh My…" was all she could get out as she pushed past a shocked Tony and Ducky to lurch of the table and over to the sinks. She looked at the reflective metal behind them to see an ugly purple bruise down the side of her face; she could even make out some finger marks. A tear escaped as she replayed the whole incident in her head; her father striking her across the face and her in an emotional mess on the floor. She had let her father win, he was left standing and she was on the floor, an emotional wreck, broken. She felt Tony come up behind her, his hot breath on her neck as he leant in close and whispered in her ear.

"He is gone Ziva, forever, he will not be part of your life."

"He will always be part of my life... He is like a scar, he will never fade." She whispered to the reflection.

"It is up to you whether he goes away, you can forget about him, you can forget about everything that had happened. I will be right here for you whenever you need." She felt his fingers trace lightly over her swollen cheek and she winced slightly at his touch before he dropped his hand and wrapped both of his arms around her waist. She buried her face into his chest before she whispered into his shirt.

"Thankyou"

* * *

_He had a hold of her around her wrists; he was yelling at her yet she couldn't hear anything, it was as if someone had pushed mute. As well as no sound, everything was in slow motion. She could see his hand coming at her slowly, she knew he would strike her yet she couldn't move away. He struck her hard and she was thrown to the floor again falling in slow motion she could see everything happening so clear. She hit the floor, her head coming in contact hard with the ground and she couldn't get up. She could feel something around her, wet, sticky; it was blood. She rolled over to see where it was coming from and there he was lying in a pool of his own blood; Tony._

* * *

He let his eyes close as his head fell backwards on the back of the sofa. He had just finished watching a movie with Ziva who had fallen asleep half way through it on his lap. He wasn't surprised after the day she had and he spent most of the night staring at the bruise on the side of her face rather than paying attention to the movie. He felt himself drifting off and even tho he knew he would have the worse back ache tomorrow he didn't want to wake Ziva as well as the fact he was too tired to move himself. He felt his head get heavier as his thoughts dissipated and before he finally made it to the land of dreams he felt Ziva's fingernails dig into his side; they actually started to hurt and he used all the energy he had left to open one eye and peek down at her. He saw her once peaceful face now tormented as she clutched harder at Tony digging her nails in further. He watched her for a second and saw a tear trail down her cheek, now he was worried. He sat up a little straighter and took the hand that dug into his side and she seemed to calm down. Her hands relaxed and so did her tense face making Tony also relax as he leant back into the sofa again still holding her hand. His eyelids felt heavy as he struggled to keep them open and once again he felt her nails dig into him, but this time much harder.

"No, no, no!" She wailed and he instantly opened his eyes and looked down at her alarmed. Instead of the lone tear down her face, this time he saw many and she shook her head from side to side. He knew he had to wake her up as she looked more and more distressed.

"Tony no!" She shrieked and buried her head into his chest. He shook her gently and whispered in her ear.

"Ziva it's okay, it's only a dream. Come on wake up Ziva, it's only a dream." She screamed as her eyes flew open and she sat up panting. "Hey, hey, are you ok?"

"Tony?"

"Yeah Zi, it's me. It was only a dream, are you ok?" She looked at him from the other end of the sofa tears still spilling down her face.

"It happened again…" He frowned at her as he tried to figure out what she meant. He then opened his arms and she quickly folded into them sobbing into his chest. "You were dead Tony, Eli killed you, you were…" She took a sharp intake of air trying to get in oxygen through her sobs and he simply kissed the top of her head and rubbed circles on her back.

"You are never going to lose me Ziva. I will be here for as long as you want me."

"But what if something…" She was cut off by an unexpected laugh from him.

"Zi, it was only a dream and I am not going anywhere." He again kissed the top of her head and pressed his face into her hair. "As I said earlier, I will be right here for you whenever you need me. We will beat this, together." She looked up at him and a smile spread across her face as the tears stopped flowing.

"Again, thank you."

"No problem… just one thing but…"

"What?"

"Can we please sleep in the actual bed because otherwise I will get a bad back." She stood up and dragged him by the hand to the bedroom.

"Reminds me of Paris." He laughed before turning off the lights and sliding into bed with Ziva in his arms.

* * *

Three weeks later and they are back to the way things should be. Team Gibbs back together again and in good health, fighting crime by day and drinking at the bar just down the road by night. Ziva sat next to Tony in the booth facing McGee and Abby, a large warm hand of his resting on her knee.

"Cheers to another case solved by team Gibbs!" Shouted Abby holding her drink in the air and a round of cheers let out as the glass bottles clunk together.

"And one month for the happy couple." Added McGee on the end as a smile beamed on Ziva's face. She felt a peck on her cheek as Tony pulled her close and she couldn't be happier. The past few months had been quite hard for not just her, but her family; and with the return of Eli she was glad to have Tony with her through the whole thing. It would be something that neither one of them would ever forget. Even though those months had been torture for them both, she was glad something good had come out of it, them. Their relationship was stronger by the day and she had realised that sometimes it was alright to show a little emotion and vulnerability from time to time. She was glad to have someone who knew her every secret and she thought about all the nights she would wake up screaming and have Tony immediately wrap his arms around her tight and tell her it was only a dream. Without him, she thought she may be in a mental institute somewhere, because he has been the one to pull her out of the dark tunnel and into the light. After Eli had gone she was a little on edge and depressed for the first week; infact she was also having nightmares, the same nightmare; Somalia, Eli, Tony on the ground. It is something she has to overcome; but the good thing was that she knew Tony was always with her and the dreams were becoming less frequent and less real. She was deep in thought about it all and a smile played her lips.

"What are you thinking about?" She felt his hot breath down her neck as he whispered in her ear and her smile grew as she broke out in Goosebumps.

"You" She looked up at him and he gave her one of his cheesy grins she loved.

"Want to know what I am thinking about?"

"What are you thinking about, Anthony DiNozzo?" He put a hand on the side of her face and leant in closer bring his voice to the quietest of whispers.

"This" and with that he leant down and kissed her tenderly on the lips.

**A.N: TADA! THE END! naww I am sooo sad myself! It was my first fic and it feels good to have it completed but sad at the same time... :( I doooo very much hope you all enjoyed this fic and I hope the ending was ok :) PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! :D :D :D It would mean so much for my last chapter and I want to know how I went to help me with future fics so please review this cht/ or the whole story. Whatever you feel :) Aswell as my other NCIS - Tiva fic 'Foreign' I am thinking about writing a Pride and Prejudice fic I think after my exam block... :) Dw I will always be writing NCIS but.**

**Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou again for everyones support :)**

**Keeely :o) xx**


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